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202436 tn?1326474333

Big decision to make...what would you do?

Let me try to give a little background for those who don't remember/know. I'll try to make it short.  In Nov 09 I quit my job to stay home with my kids. We'd had some behavior issues with DD7, plus I felt I ddidn't really know my DS2 (just turned 1 at the time).  We only lost about $200 a month after accounting for the extra gas, daycare etc.  I'm really enjoying my time being home with my kids.  I have 3 that are in school and 2 that are at home all day (ages 15, 7, 6, 2, 5 mos)

Here's the thing.  I got a call from my old boss this morning, asking if I wanted to come back..either full or part time.  I'm considering it but I just don't know.  I'd definaetly have to make more than what I was when I left.  Otherwise it wouldn't be worth it.  We don't NEED the extra money but it would be nice...especially since DH is working 50 hour weeks He is also going to be starting school in the spring to get a technical diploma.  I want to go back to work for a few reasons:  the extra money, the social interaction (I get NONE right now except wtih my kids), getting out of the house.  I DON'T want to go back for these reasons:  I'll miss spending the extra time with my kids, I don't relish the idea of someone ELSE raising my kids (even part time), I already have a hard time keeping up with laundry/housework-but perhaps without us being here during the day to mess things up it might be easier.  

I've considered going back part time-approx 30 hours per week so I can still pick my older kids up from school and would only have to put the younger 2 in daycare.  

I LOVED my job when I was working.  I did property management and helped out as an assistant for the construction company. Part of the prop mgmt was going to court for evictions/judgments and I saw the judge a few months ago...even HE said he missed me and would rather *I* be back than the girl they had at the time.  

The girl who took over for me when I left quit for a better paying job.  The girl that replaced her was "let go" this morning for "other reasons"  I'm flattered that they called me and want me back and I'd love to go back...but there are so many things to weigh out.

What would you do based on the info I gave....be honest, I want opinion sto help me think this through.  Ask questions if you need more info.  Thanks Ladies!!
11 Responses
187316 tn?1386356682
I work my part time job solely for the reason of getting away from the kids and a little adult interaction. When I stayed home with them I seriously felt stir crazy. I also feel like I appreciate them more when I don't see them for a couple hours. Gives me a chance to miss them.
280369 tn?1316702041
Personally, the only time I worked was when I was pregnant with my first son. I worked until I was about 8 months preggo (My husband has a flooring business, and at the time we had a store that had to be run from 9-5 Mon-Sat) I gave birth and then actually went back to help out for a little while, but I brought my son with me. (one of the perks of running your own business) I never felt comfortable just leaving him anywhere. Even if it was with family. But after a few more months, I stopped completely to stay home with him and I have ever since. I love it and don't think I could ever go work anywhere unless my husband couldn't work for some reason.
This is just my opinion, but if you don't need the extra money, I would just stay home with your kids. They are only little but for so long and they need their mommy to be there. I have decided when my kids are grown or out of the house, that's when I can go out and maybe get a job and do things that I didn't get to do when they were little, but for now, they need me.
But I also understand you wanting adult interaction as well. I don't have many friends that live near me, and even some of my family is far away, but I have gotten used to it now. Occasionally we will have people over on the weekend and that's my interaction. But motherhood comes with sacrifices I suppose, and if not getting a lot of adult interaction means I get to be there for my child 24/7, then I am okay with that. :) Do I sound crazy!?!? lol
Avatar universal
Only u can make the choice, if u feel u are happier when u interact with other adults then this happiness will pass to your children, if u are back home when the older ones are back from school I would go back part time. As I say if you feel better going to work and like the company I would go with my inner feelings x
1271927 tn?1310580362
You certainly have to do what feels right for you. But there are options here that all seem to benefit you. Staying at home is certianly nice - I wish I could be able to do that, but I know it's not feasible as I provide a great deal of income for our family. But your situation seems different than mine.

Typically when you go back to an old job (especially when they call you back), you will get more money than before. They have been through other people that didn't work out, they realize your value, and you are cheaper overall than training a new person that might not work out again.

I would have a preliminary meeting with your potential employer and get answers to your questions. I would be frank and honest with your employer. Let them know that your family is your first priority and you do not have intentions of working full time. If they expect you to work full time, then you might not be the best choice. Next, I would let them know that you have 2 children to put in daycare if you return to work and the pay you get must outweigh the cost of decent daycare.

I would also ask about the potentail of working from home for some of those hours. I am sure they want you in the office for most of them, but if you can work 20 hours in the office and 10 hours at home, you might end up with a nice balance. Work an hour or two each day after the kids go to bed, but leave early each day from work to spend time with the kids and take off each friday all together. You would get adult interaction, job saitisfaction, the feeling of sucess, knowing that you are still mothering your own kids, and some extra income.

If the conditions are right and on your terms, this could be a great opportunity. But if things don't go the way you want (pay, hours, time with family) you may to consider declining the offer. A meeting with your "boss" might prove useful in helping to make your decision.
Avatar universal
Stay at home - you can always work later. ;-)

In all seriousness I would rather be the one raising my kids these younger years before they head off to school. I can always go back to work when they're in school. To me they are more important than an little extra income.

I think the only way I'd do it is if I was able to do it from home, on my own terms and hours.
456039 tn?1302660148
I think your husband is spreading himself thin working 50 hours a week and then trying school. I think it would be nice, and hugely helpful for your husband if you worked part time and took some stress off of him.

Avatar universal
I totally agree with Crisy, I would take a part time job If I could (I work full time :( ....)
Avatar universal
I would go back part-time... It gives you a much needed break from the kids and some adult interaction.
1346146 tn?1299360497
If you dont need the money, I personally wouldnt go back.  I would rather my younger kids get their foundation from me than someone else.  Thats the biggest reason I quit my career.  I miss it but I know I am teaching and raising my kids with my values and belief system not someone elses.  Either way only you can decide whats right for you, good luck.
202436 tn?1326474333
Thanks Ladies. I realy appreciate the opinions. DH and I talked about it and we seriously considered it.  We have decided that for now I am going to decline.  I would have to make close to $8 more an hour to make it really worth while.  By that I mean making enough so that DH doesn't have to work so many extra hours plus the extra time/gas to drive out there (they have moved further out since I worked there last) Plus I already have a hard time keeping up the house and laundry for 7 people now when I have all day to do it.. I can't imagine working even part time and having that to do as well.  Plus there are several things my kids are in that would require me taking a lot of time off work to drive them, especially during the summer.  MY biggest reason is like Joy said...I would much rather raise my kids during these early years.  We had to put DS2 in daycare starting at 6 weeks.  That was one major reason I left my job.  I missed most of his firsts and I felt I hardly knew him.  Plus DD7 tends to have worse behavior problems when she doesn't get enough sleep and Mom time.  

So, as much as I would LIKE to go back to this job, I think for now the best thing is going to be for me to stay home.  I would like to find something I could do from here though.  I just haven't figured out what that could be.  (I don't do Avon or Mary Kay or Pampered Chef-just not into that)

Thanks again for the help!
1346146 tn?1299360497
When you find a legit work from home job let me know, I would love to find something too, I am not into all that avon pampered chef either....Good luck!
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