800427 tn?1324945719

How close/far apart in age are your kids?

the title pretty much says it all. How close in age are your kids and do you like it or not? what are the pros and cons to kids close together vs kids that are far apart in age? Im really interested in the families that have extremes especially...kids that are super close together and kids that are super far apart in ages.

We just arent sure when we want to have number two and id like to get some perspective..so tell me about your kids!
32 Responses
Sort by: Helpful Oldest Newest
Avatar universal
My boys are
almost 2(October)
Then I am due December 24th 2010

My step sons are 9 and 5
Helpful - 0
1244180 tn?1325899111
My boys are 4 and 6 and then newborn in feb
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
My boys are ethan is 4(will be 5 in Nov) Hunter just turned 2 and Logan is 4m.  ethan and hunter was 2y9m apart and hunter and logan are 20m apart....i thought i wanted my kids close in age ..Ahh but not the 2y9m apart is a lot easier then 20m!! Hunter is still in that "needed" stage
Helpful - 0
317019 tn?1532965586
my son is 6 years old and im due in the next 2 weeks with a little girl....we were thinking about trying again next year but giving the situation we are really not sure right now
Helpful - 0
796506 tn?1370188305
My little boys are 4 years apart (almost to the day) and Marley (youngest) and Richie (middle) will be about 3 years and 7 months apart =) I really have been able to enjoy each of them being in their baby/toddler stages and I feel like I have been able to enjoy and give each of them their special attention =)
Helpful - 0
1276121 tn?1420860600
My boys are 6 and 3 making them 3yrs 2 months apart. I really liked that my oldest was out of the needing me 24/7 stage and potty trained. They do play really well together most of the time but i sometimes wonder what it would be like if they were closer. I am also due in march 2011 which will put my now youngest and baby 4 years apart. im excited to find out how this will work.
Helpful - 0
342647 tn?1291107933
My little girl is 3.10yrs and little boy is 20mths.  They are 2yrs, 2mths apart.  We are going to try for number three around oct/nov so that would make the next gap (if it happens quickly) 2yrs, 9mths.  I think the slightly bigger gap will be great especially with my son as he is very clingy and very used to being the baby.  I think giving him a little more time will really help.  I have friends who have them closer together - 3 girls with about 18mths between them all and she finds it very difficult.  Add to the fact that she breast fed them all until 12mths means that her body has not really had a break from pregnancy or BF for nearly 4 years now - that has to take it out of you.  I guess everyone is different and you have to take lots of factors into consideration from your individual children and there needs/personalities to age of parents, work /money needs and what you think you can cope with (which can change with each additional child.  However somethimes you really don't have much control over when the next comes along as one of my friends found out - she has 2 same age as mine and just had another one 3 months ago which was a little surprise.  Good luck with your choice and hope all works out well.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
My guys are 5 minutes apart.
Helpful - 0
278664 tn?1319840159
My girls are 23 months apart, they are almost 9 and almost 7.  They have their moments but have fun together.  Then I have a little boy who just turned 2 and now ttc for number 4.  I would have them closer together but we were buying a house and wanted to wait a little bit more, that is why there is 5 yrs between the 2 youngest.  My son is a huge handful and I wanted to wait til he was 2 to try again, so he and the next one will hopefully be about 3 yrs apart. You will know what to do, just trust yourself.
Helpful - 0
964234 tn?1331949207
I only have one child, Franky who is 2 weeks old.  But, I grew up the eldest of 3 girls.  We are all 4 years apart.  I love it and think 3-4 years is perfect and loved growing up with my sisters... when I was 8 I had one sister who was 4 and one who was an infant.  We are inseparable now as adults =) (I am 28 one sister is 24 and one is 20).  
Helpful - 0
951898 tn?1296134343
My kids are 4 years apart, and that is how I planned it...Me and my siblings were also 4 years apart..I think that is a great age gap, just because like Nikki said you have time to enjoy each of their stages more...My oldest had started school right after I had my middle child, and now I just had my last baby 6 days ago and my middle child will be starting school in a few weeks...I mean they have their moments, but I really enjoy it this way...
Helpful - 0
800427 tn?1324945719
We were thinking of trying again a couple months after Matthew (my now 3 month old) turns 2...but we might choose to wait until he's potty trained because im not sure if i like the idea of having 2 in diapers and it might be fun if he was old enough to be interested in helping out...like getting things for me or wanting to feed the baby...stuff like that. but i think some of you ladies made a good point about it depending on what his personality turns out to be like..like if he's independent or clingy..i guess i'll have to wait and see! but thanks for the feedback girls this really helps me to think clearly about this and makes it easier to plan our family!
Helpful - 0
1003723 tn?1306252350
My son just turned 3 in April, and I'm due September 26th with another lil boy!!! So they will be almost 3 1/2 years apart when my other lil guy decides to arrive. I'm very happy with the age difference between them, since I knew I wanted another child after my first but wasn't too sure when I would try again since I have a really rough pregnancies and it really takes a toll on my body and myself, also my oldest is potty trained and very independent which is a plus for me =0). On the other hand though I am the oldest and was 8 when my mom decided to have my middle brother, too me that was way too much time between us because I was use to be the only child by then and really was upset when my mom had him, were still not that close to this day but we will talk every know and then, and then my youngest brother was born 3 1/2 years after my middle brother on my b-day (we are 14 years apart), were also not that close, and my brothers seem to fight all the time. I'm really hoping that my two lil guys aren’t like my brothers.
Helpful - 0
1293887 tn?1332702847
My son is 3 and my daughter is 1 and I am 10 weeks pregnant with our third.  I will be honest it is hard work but well worth it.  My kids have started playing with eachother so that makes it a lot easier.  There is no way I could have them further apart for personal reasons and that is why we chose to have them close together.  We tried to have them closer together but ttc made it difficult lol
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Eldest is 10 and then we have a toddler who is 20months. Both boys and the best of buds. Big boy was over the moon to finally get a sibling and would do absolutely anything for him. However the toddler is very very spoilt by all of us. The new baby will be here around christmas so it will be  a totally different dynamic all togeather. I am hoping the new baby will make my toddler realise that not all things revolve around him.
Helpful - 0
971074 tn?1362759766
Thanks for asking this question. I think About this a lot. We are pregnant for our first and I'm getting ready to turn 33. I kind of want them close together but it seems like 2-3 years apart might be best. I keep thinking that I want to just stay in baby mode for a few years instead of having to go back and forth. I know when I take care of my nieces and nephews, I much rather take two of them than one of them because they entertain each other.
Helpful - 0
470885 tn?1326329037
Daniel is 3 years 10 months old and Gil is 6 months old....so they're 3 years, 4 months apart.

Before we had Daniel, we thought we'd start TTC around his first birthday and have them closer together.  But when that time rolled around, we weren't ready:  we wanted time to just enjoy him and being a family of 3 :-)  We started TTC when he was 2.5 years old and were successful pretty much right away.  By then, Daniel was well on his way to being toilet trained (having one in diapers is SO much better than 2, IMO).  Plus Daniel is able to entertain himself (for a certain amount of time) while I breastfeed or tend to Gil....and he's old enough to be able to help with small tasks.  If I had it to do over again, I'd do it the same way.
Helpful - 0
202436 tn?1326474333
Ok lets see if I can get this to make sense:
Alex = 14
Abby = 7
Zach = 5 (6 next month)
Gabe =2

Abby and Alex are 7 years apart and really aren't that close, I think it has a lot to do wtih how high strung abby is tho and how she's a trouble maker
Alex and Zach are 8  and 2 mos apart.  They are a little close than her and abby but not by much.  Don't get me wrong, they love each other but they just don't have that really close bond.  The pro is that alex is older enough to help out and babysit.

Abby and Zach are 14 months apart and are about as close as a brother and sister can be.  They play together, are practically inseperable but there's a lot of fighting and arguing too.  They entertain each other, share toys, argue over toys, etc.  But I love this age difference, even with the fighting they are so close and I love it.  The only "con" I've found to this is that Zach being younger and having 2 older sister, one of whom he is very close to, he tends to do "girly" things like dressing up in abbys dress clothes.  But I Try not to make a big deal out of it, hoping it's a phase.

Abby and Gabe are 5 yrs apart.  Abby loves him to pieces and will play wtih him, but more so she likes to play wtih his toys LOL.  They have a bond just not what her and Zach have.

Zach and Gabe are 3 yrs 11 mos apart, when Gabe was an infant Zach would love all over him, now that he's a toddler they butt heads a lot.  They get jealous of each other and bully each other around (more so Gabe bullying Zach and Zach getting upset), they fight over toys etc.  But they still share a bond, just not as close as Abby and Zach

Alex and Gabe are 12 yrs apart and I think Alex was old enough to really appreciate a new sibling at that point and she really shares a bond with him.  There are many times when he gets hurt he runs to HER instead of me or DH.  Or he wants HER to hold him all the time.

I think it really depends on the child too.  

As far as parenting goes.  I found that I actually liked having my middle two so close together, It meant double the diapers, etc...but really wasn't that hard and they were out of the diapers and potty trained within a few months of each other so it didn't drag it all out.  

Having experienced having kids very close together and several years apart I personally prefer the closer together, I find its easier and the bond between the children is stronger and more special.  Just my experience tho.
Helpful - 0
1278876 tn?1304908319
Riley is 20 months and will be barely two when the baby is born jan.

In my experience i came from a large family (mom and dad split when i was 3) and they each have their own set of kids. My mom and step dad had Jarrod when i was 9 and then had my twin brothers when he was 18 months. My dad's side had oodles of kids (5 in total the biggest gap is 2 years i believe) but i never spent alot of time with that side of my family.

I think there are pros and cons to having kids really close or far apart. My brothers loved being close in age as they got to play with eachother as soon as the littler ones were old enough to play. But my mom liked having me be alot older so i could help out. Also when they are really close it can get overwhelming of course having a toddler and infant at the same time.

I'm kinda worried how overwhelmed i might get with DS being 2 years apart ( praying the terrible twos are over by then as he has started early lol) since I'll be home with them by myself alot of the time as DH works and I've decided to wait until they are a little bit older for me to go back to school and probably start working from home doing my own baking/cake business.

I think either way is good, if they are older they can help out and get to appreciate having a new sibling and if they are younger they will be able to play together and when they are that close in age they are usually closer friends. So it really depends on personal preference i'm looking forward to Riley being able to have a sibling on two years apart but we are going to wait till they are both out of diapers to try for another lol
Helpful - 0
879179 tn?1287503465
Oh man reading these answers scare me- at best mine will be 14 months apart- My oldest turns 1 on August 24th and #2 is due October 29th(ish- they can't decide.)  Jade is becoming more and more independent every day and getting really good at throwing fits- I really hope I survive the next 2 or 3 years, lol.  I know I will because SO many other people have done it, but as of right now, I definalty would NOT have planned it this way.
Helpful - 0
1293887 tn?1332702847
When I look at myself I think of my mum.  My mum had 5kids.  My eldest brother is 37, myeldest sister is 33 my brother  is 28 and my sister and I are 26. My mum was a single mum with 3under 2. Shekicked my dad out when we were 3and then he died when we were 9. I am surprised wearestill alive lol but my mumwas awesome!!!!  When Ithink of the bad days Ithink ofmy mum and my brother, sisterand Ihad an awesome time together.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Well you said you like to hear about the extremes so... I myself only have a 3 yr old little girl. We are planning on trying for another around October of next year. But I am the oldest  of 4. I'm 21, my brother is 14, oldest sister is 12, and just got a new half sister in May so we are 21 years apart. My mom plans on having more with her new husband and my other siblings feel like they are trying to start their own new little family and leaving them out. I just hope they don't resent the babies because of jt
Helpful - 0
1225487 tn?1370363445
mackenzie 10
gage 5
rayden 4

i liked the gap between mackenzie and gage and the boys are 16 months apart and i am due on feb 21st with number 4. gage was really jealous when we brought rayden home but as they have gotten older they dont like to be seperated.
Helpful - 0
1194973 tn?1385503904
I'm still pregnant, so I don't have kids yet, but I do have a decent amount of siblings so I could tell you those. I'm the oldest at 20 years old, and I have 6 younger siblings. (Not all from the same mother though) The next closest is 19, then 14 (deceased), 13, 12, 9, 5 and the youngest just turned 1. I'm closest to my younger sister who is 19, just because we're 18 months apart and did a lot together. I'm not so much with the others just because I've moved out and am now starting my own family. The only advantage to having a lot of younger siblings is that my daughter will be able to have people to hang out around when she's growing up. Personally I'd prefer to have my children close in age versus spacing them out.
Helpful - 0
Have an Answer?

You are reading content posted in the Pregnancy Community

Top Pregnancy Answerers
13167 tn?1327194124
Austin, TX
Learn About Top Answerers
Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
Ask a question
Popular Resources
Get information and tips on how to help you choose the right place to deliver your baby.
Get the facts on how twins and multiples are formed and your chance of carrying more than one baby at a time.
Learn about the risks and benefits of circumcision.
What to expect during the first hours after delivery.
Learn about early screening and test options for your pregnancy.
Learn about testing and treatment for GBS bacterium.