Avatar universal

I'm scared.

I live with my husband in a foriegn country and I don't have any relatives/friends who can take care of me. I'm scared of how I will take care of my newborn and myself after the delivery. It will be my first child so I don't have any experience. My husband won't get many days off. Anyone who went through a similar situation?
4 Responses
13167 tn?1327194124
I see you're about 10 weeks along from your other posts - that's PLENTY of time to make friends!  I don't know where you are living,  but it's highly likely there are other women in your area who are also newly pregnant and looking for friends who are expecting too.  Can you talk to your doctor or midwife about support or exercise type groups for expectant moms?

On the other hand,  if you have a fairly routine delivery (vaginal or c-section) and a healthy baby,  you really won't need help after the baby is born.  Grandmas do like to come and help out because it's fun,  but you can do it by yourself especially with your husband coming home in the evening.  

Best wishes.

973741 tn?1342342773
Yes, I was in a similar situation.  My mom is passed away and when I had our first son, it seemed everyone I knew was busy.  It was a little bittersweet.  I'd baby sat a lot in my younger years and had nieces and nephews I'd cared for, but it's not quite like 24/7 as a mama!  

Here's what I realized.  MUCH of it comes naturally.  And if you have someone to run questions by, that is important.  If you can call or text your mom or a relative----  just to reassure you or tell you things, you'll be fine.  My sister did take all of my phone calls and gave me advice.  I had a good baby care book too which I read cover to cover.  

My husband was off work for one week. I was terrified when he went back to work and it was all ME!  But you know what, you kind of just handle it when you are in charge.  Newborns are not complicated.  feed, change, swaddle, cuddle, sleep, feeed, change, swaddle, cuddle, sleep, etc.  :>)  Throw in loads of laundry when you can, rest when baby does.

Now, this is a biggie.  My husband might have been tired after work . . .  BUT, I needed a break.  So after dinner---  HE was in charge of baby for a while and I went to our room on my own to shower, rest, read, veg, etc.  Demand your husband get involved if it doesn't come naturally.  My husband was a bit timid with baby (called them soft shells and was afraid he'd break them, ha ha)---  so I had to force it in the beginning a bit.  But ultimately, this was special bonding time for baby and daddy.

Making friends while pregnant is great.  I wouldn't expect that they'll be of too much help when you deliver just because they'll either be A. moms themselves trying to figure it out too or B. not moms who are clueless.  ha ha.  But they are good to talk to and have in your corner.  So, try to get out and meet some other ladies around you.  

And of course, we're here to answer any questions and offer support too.  Med Help has a parenting newborns and pediatrics forum which might be helpful!  good luck hon.  It will be okay, I promise!
Avatar universal
Thank youu so much♥
973741 tn?1342342773
no problem ---  we're all happy to talk to you here.  :)
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13167 tn?1327194124
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