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Avatar universal

Is my ex pregnant?

Hello doctor,

I've been seeing this girl off and on for about 6 months. We recently stopped seeing each other. I'm 22 and she is 24. She has been on the pill for 8 years now and says she takes it perfectly all the time. We were having unprotected sex but I always pulled out - i know i know. Early last month she came down with symptoms of throwing up and feeling dizzy for a couple of days so she went to the doc. They told her it was probably food poisoning or stomach flu. She didn't feel great for a couple more days but it went away. I got worried about pregnancy so she took a pregnancy test - first response - a few days before her period was due at night and it came back negative. She said she started her period 2 days later. A week later she said she still wasn't feeling well - couldn't sleep, no appetite, back hurt, etc. Chalked this up to stress. Recently, about a week ago, she went in for her "yearly check up" with gyno and they took her blood etc and said she's anemic and she says she had another period recently which makes 2 since last time we had sex about a month and a half ago. She also said they did a urine pregnancy test as it's standard and it too came back negative. She insists she's NOT pregnant and gets really upset when i bring it up because she says i don't trust her. I wonder why they would test her for anemia though. Is that standard or is that only something they would do at a first pregnancy appointment? it's iron deficient anemia by the way. Something doesn't feel right to me here...either she is saying this because we broke up or maybe she is actually pregnant? She still parties and i've seen her drink and smoke 1 cigarette so i don't know. Do you think she could actually be pregnant or is this all just a coincidence? what about the anemia doc? that sounds a little fishy to me...is this usually pregnancy related? it's not like she's a vegetarian or something. do you think she actually pregnant? she says there is no way.

please help

thanks.
22 Responses
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425962 tn?1285086458
good grief, move on already!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Wether your ex is pregnant or not a child is a gift and many people out there cannot have children,at 22 your a man so if she was pregnant it would be down to you both to pull together for the littleone.

HOWEVER!!!
I DO NOT think she is pregnant and you must be driving her and yourself insane!!!
I am 6 1/2 weeks pregnant and i have had no back ache and little nausea....
These are common things anyone can get in everyday life,she doesnt have to be pregnant!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I also did a first response test 1 WEEK BEFORE my period was due and it shown positve.
I think by 8-9 weeks you would have had a positive by now wether she drunk a tone of water or not.
The poor girl doesnt want to do a blood test so leave her.....!!!!
Several negatives is enough to tell you she isnt.
You really do need to leave her alone now and get on with your life.

But i agree with above comments...maybe this will make you think twice about doing the deed without a condom if your so obsessed about not being a father!!!!!!!!!!!

Helpful - 0
865924 tn?1240327536
Just because someone is sick doesn't mean they are pregnant!!!!!! I have been anemic several times in my life and I have NEVER been pregnant. She says she isn't....take her word for it and move on! You don't want her to be, so even if she is.......she obviously doesn't want you involved at all so this takes care of your not wanting that responsibility! SHE IS NOT PREGNANT!!!     GET OVER IT!!!!!   GET A LIFE AND MOVE ON!!!!!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
as you must have read, she may not be pregnant. that or she just dose not want to be. im a young mother myself. 22. and i didnt know i was pregnant till i was 12 weeks. First Responce is the best test to take. i have a feeling your worried about her being pregnant. what do you think your supposed to feel? good? no, your young and scared and worried. your best bet is to sit down with her and find out if she wants a baby first off... then if she is she can deal with that then. by what you said i honestly couldnt tell you if she is or isnt. either way its a big step. i would have her go to clinic once she is about 17 weeks... no tests at home she may not take it. and you should be there also. you will have your results...

  good luck
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
If she is pregnant, which she isnt, then its the outcome of your own actions and you will have to live with it. You are 22 grow up and start acting like it. Let her alone to live her life and move on with hers. I am barely 6 wks and took first responce the day I was due for my period and it showed up. The girl is not pregnant, plus if the last time you had sex was as long ago as you say it was then she will start showing in some form or fashion soon enough. Grow up and move on.
Helpful - 0
851147 tn?1247616389
she is NOT pregnant!  First response is the most sensitive test you can buy on the market (the lines early result) It caught my prgnancy asap i mean early! Move on you are making yourself nuts for no reason. She does not need a blood test.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I'm sorry I really feel you need to drop it!! Like others have said, if she is pregnant she wont be able to hide it for long. Also the First Response tests detect the HCG hormone at 25 while others detect at 50!! So First Response is a MORE sensative than others!!
In my opinion it seems like you may still have feelings for this woman!! You are obsessing way too much!! You need to just relax and let time tell. You are going to end up pushing her completly out of your life. Does her current boyfriend know that you think she's prego. by you?  This cant be helping you or thier relationship!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
So,

she tells me the reason her last test looked clear or whatever is because she drinks water...well, i keep reading how drinking a lot of water or whatever can dilute the test. on top of that she thinks a blood test is a waist of time because she knows she is not pregnant...i don't get how she can say this...this was a first response digital which i've heard are not as sensitive...do you think drinking a lot of water would have affected this test even if it was done at like 8-9 weeks? that's if she even took the test and didnt just dunk it in the toilet water...anybody??? either she's lying to me or she just doesn't care
Helpful - 0
822733 tn?1258143726
You need to calm down.  As all the others have said, she's not pregnant!  Many, many women know their body, including myself.  I knew within 2 days before my period was to come that I was pregnant......that's how good some of us know our bodies.  You need to have trust in her and believe when she tells you she isn't pregnant.  Unless she's crazy and has spewed you lies throughout your relationship with her should you really have concern.  A urine test is just as accurate as a blood test, just as tuktuki stated above, the HCG levels will rise.  So just sit back and relax with your new girlfriend.  One other thing, and I don't mean to come off as a *itch, but next time you decide to become sexually active with someone, wear a condom rather then take the girls word as far as her being on birth control so you don't find yourself in this situation again.  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
In all seriousness.... she's not pregnant. I have been pregnant 7 times (3 miscarriages) and am currently pregnant. She's not pregnant... you're in the clear... don't even worry about, move on with your new girl and be happy, but be more careful so you don't do this to yourself next time....
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
anybody?
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
i forgot to mention...she went through the entire list of early pregnancy symptoms and she said the only one's she maybe has had are fatigue and sore back...and she doesn't think the stomach cramping is a system...she also said she's had 2 periods and doesn't care about women who have had periods or repeat negative urine tests but were actually pregnant...because she says she knows her body and she knows that she is not pregnant...anybody???
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Dr Brown/anybody,

I definitely DON'T want her to be pregnant and I sure as he.ll don't wanna get back together with her...I want to move on with my new girlfriend and know for sure that she IS NOT pregnant. She tells me she knows she's not because she hasn't been having symptoms over and over and that she has had fatigue for about 3-4 months now which she blames on the anemia, she said she's had cramps that doctors can't figure out for like 2-3 years now and her back has been bothering her for about 5 years now. She refuses to get a blood test because she says it's a waste of time and that she doesn't need it. She said she doesn't wanna take time out of her day to go get a blood test and that she's afraid of needles. She also lied and said she had to go to the er a few days ago but wouldn't tell me why...she said it wasn't related to this...she told me they always test women for pregnancy when they go to the ER which I know is a lie because i've taken an ex to the ER and they didn't just automatically test her...so with her...I don't know what to believe anymore. She said if she was pregnant she wouldn't be drinking and partying...which I would hope not. I just want to make sure I can trust these results. As far as the last test she took not looking like it was peed on...she said she drinks a lot of water which i'm pretty sure she actually does...but it was in the morning so that doesn't really make sense to me. With 4 negative urine tests and 2 "periods" can I finally put this behind me doc or does she need a blood test because of the symptoms/anemia???
Helpful - 0
603463 tn?1220626855
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
Hi!
I'm having  a little trouble figuring out your agenda--do you wish she was pregnant so the two of you could get back together? I often check my patients for anemia both pregnant and non-pregnant. A lot of them have anemia, both pregnant, and non-pregnant.  Most of the time when women lie, the say they are pregnant when they are not, not the other way round. I think you two should have a heart to heart, and you should figure out why this is bothering you so much!

Good luck!
Dr B
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
No she is definitely not pregnant! I am one of the cases where my pregnancy test at home was negative but I missed my period and later on found out to be positive. I think she is anaemic..feeling dizzy and throwing up due to nausea is common for anaemia. By the way, anemia is not a symptom of pregnancy...and pregnancy does not envoke anaemia either!!! In some cases, in 2nd semester of pregnancy (thats 4th to 6th months), you may have haemoglobin deficiency and doctors prescribe iron tablets (I am having those now). So nothing in your repeated posts show anything that relates to her being pregnant!! Plus you say her urine test showed negative! If she was pregnant, at this stage, it the hcg level in her urine should be high enough to be captured in urine test. So plz stop the panic, have faith. This is not something she can lie about for long..its gonna eventually show up! so why should she???
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
i keep reading about girls who have their period throughout their pregnancies and it's real common...not to mention that they repeatedly test negative on urine tests...she refuses to do a blood test because she "knows" that she is not pregnant and that she isn't having symptoms - she just has anemia and her back has always bothered her...what if she is pregnant and just doesnt know it???
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
shes not pregnant.
Helpful - 0
212161 tn?1599427282
i think you need to STOP  , your driving your self crazy and her out of your life. shes not pg from all the testshe has done.    you need to leave it alone and start back living, before you end up with bad anxiety.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
well...she pretty much hates me now but upon some serious persuading she has agreed to take another test but she doesn't want me to talk to her anymore after that...i just get worried because i keep reading about women who still have their period or get multiple negative test results but later find out that they are pregnant...how often does that realistically happen?
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Anemia is not pregnancy related.  While it's important for pregnant women to consume a certain amount of iron, her being anemic is not a sign of pregnancy.  I don't think she's pregnant, either.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
What about the anemia? I'm tearing my hair out over this!!! does it sound pregnancy related?
Helpful - 0
603463 tn?1220626855
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
Hi!
I don't think she's pregnant!
I think you're stuck believing her.  If her stomach starts to grow--you'll know something is up!

Good luck!
Dr B
Helpful - 0

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