vasectomy vs. tubal

[blueeyedtabbycat]

The title pretty much says it all.I posted this on the 35+ forum as well.  I need some advise from my MH friends here. I cant take much more of this mirena. DH say absolutly no more kids but I keep saying that you never know what the future holds. What one is more easily reversed?? Cost of either, what is better?? Experiance with either of them??? I really dont want to go the tubal route but if DH wont get the vasectomy I might have to. I dont want to do any other type of BC as I am sick of the hormones and headaches and weight gain. We have tried a bunch of diffrent bc's over the last 13 years but have mainly relied on the pullout method. That has worked very well for us but I think DH might be suffering because of it. He always gets pains in his balls after wards and on other occations from holding it off.  I am not ready to say Im done have kids forever. But I need to get this damn mirena out.
I supoose we could go without BC since we havent had sex in months (sorry tmi) but......................
Any advise would be great!!
Thanks,
Tabitha

[blueeyedtabbycat]

thank you ladies. Yeah I guess im not even considering tubal any more. DH deffintly said he is getting fixed so in the mean time I guess we will just be careful. We have never gotten pregnant unless we were ttc in the past so..........
As for the paragaurd I have heard of this.  But again I am afraid of a forieng object in my body. And thats only if I would have went through with a tubal. I am 100% sure I am not done, even if DH is. You never know what the future holds:~)

Cassandra- There is a diffence. The proformance of a woman isnt going to be an issue. I have heard that a reversl is harder for a tubal also.

[Cassandrajane]

I dont know ANYTHING about it. BUT, would having your tubes tied be the same as having a man having the snip. I ask because...
My step brothers dad had the snip and then got a new wife and she wanted kids although he already has 4 she wanted kids of her own, so he got it reversed... And after the reversal he couldnt ermm shall we say 'Deliever' properly. And so they had to go through IVF she is pregnant with twins. I only asked because as he couldnt erm 'deliever' properly wouldnt it kinda be the same but with Eggs? I duno. I am only asking... I am new to all the tube and stuff I never knew there were so many ways they can be closed. Like Snipped, Burned and stuff its all confusing to me.

x

[WifeofAnt]

Vasectomies are easier done, easier undone if you change your mind, more effective, and cheaper.  You can also check if they're working (unlike a tubal ligation).

[LosingMyMindInGA]

The best advice *I* can give you is this:

If YOU are not 100% sure you dont' want any more kids.  DO NOT get a tubal.  

If he is so deadseat against more kids right now, then let him get the procedure done.  

There ARE other forms of permanent birth control for women besides tubals.  I think it's called Paragaurd.  Basically they put these little implants inside the tubes and it causes scar tissue to grow around them and block the tubes off.  I don't know much about it but I saw it at my docs office.

I've already told DH I don't want any form of permanent birth control nor do I want anything hormonal that is going to screw up my system.  So basically this time around we are going with FAM.  If it works, it works, if not, well oops.  

[blueeyedtabbycat]

Thank you ladies! I just dont know what to do. DH and I talked tonight and he is soooooooo set on being done. He says absolutly no more kids. He is so stressed about money right now. We cant pay the bills as it is and I swear I wouldnt want to get pregnant right now and give him an ulcer.
I have to wait to do anything untill I get insurance so I guess I still have time to think ...................
Thank you ladies!

[Brittny27]

I know I do not want a tubal I want BF to get a vesectamy for many of the reasons already said. I know two people that have ended up pregnant 4 years after their husband had one done. It's very important to keep getting sperm counts done.

[Limonada]

I was watching a TV show that's on here in Canada called The Mom Show, and they had a doctor on one day talking about this.  Apparently - at least according to what he saiid - tubals are more easily reversed....as long as the tubes are just clipped and no ablation or burning is done.  

My husband is going to be calling the doctor soon (I hope) to get a referral for a vasectomy.  It's an outpatient procedure, much less invasive than if I were to get my tubes tied.  Around here, they do them on Fridays - the men can recover all weekend are usually fine by Monday.  

With a vasectomy , it's important that the patient go back for a follow up appointment where they check to make sure there are no stray sperm kicking around.  Otherwise, well, I've heard of a few couples having "surprises" down the line ;-)

Good luck with your decision!

[mom2ariana]

i know this really doesn't answer your question, but whenever you DO decide you don't want kids i think if me and DH can afford it we are BOTH getting it done. i think thats fair and very effective..with just one method alone i would still worry.. just my two cents. :)

[BTS1022]

Vasectomies are 100% cheaper, and a lot safer. They just get a local numbing shot below the scrotum and base of penis. The whole thing takes less than an hour, depending on how fast the doctor can find the seminal veins that need to be cut. They can do it one of 2 ways...1 incision or 2 incisions. I watched my ex husband get his done, took 30 minutes 1 incision and no stitches. The pain wasn't that bad, he barely needed ice or pain meds.

A tubal ligation is a surgery...you go under general anastesia(sp), which is dangerous all in itself. You do have to stay in the hospital(not sure how long). I do believe they can do it laparoscopically, where they don't need to make huge incisions anymore, but it is still considered a major surgery, and you will obviously have the risks that follow any major surgery.

I vote that the man should go get a vasectomy....let them prove how MANLY they are by not making their wives go through major surgery!

[Clysta]

I've always heard a vasectomy is easier to reverse than a tubal, just because if your tubes are damaged or cut there's the chance that nothing will be able to be reversed which would result in IVF for future children.

[LosingMyMindInGA]

I don't have experience but I can tell you what i learned from researching and talking to my doctor.  

A vasectomy can be done as an outpatient procedure right in the doctors office so would therefore be cheaper

A tubal is considered outpatien surgery at the hospital, which of course costs more, it is also considered a higher risk procedure than a vasectomy.

I dont' know about reversals but according to my doctor a vasectomy has a better rate of being effective.

I'm in Georgia and when I called about the costs of a vasectomy it was about $1200, a tubal was over $2000.  

I told DH that I will not have a tubal done for several reasons a) I'm not 100% sure I don't want any more kids b) I don't want to undergo surgery and c) it costs more and is riskier

He was scared of having a vasectomy but I finally convinced him that it does NOT affect his ability to perform that it is very simple and he will only need about 2-3 days recoop time at home then maybe a months time on light duty at work.  

He's never made an appt though, I don't think he really knows if he's done having kids or not either.  

[Raerae336]

If you're not absolutely sure you don't want kids.. don't get the tubal.. if he gets fixed you can freeze his sperm in case you change your mind.. that'd be my choice:)