Frustrated

[surabhi23393]

Hello.
I dont know how to put things. My bf and I love each other a lot n hez a really good guy but its been almost a year and he has never praised or complimented me to make me feel special. Its torturing now because whenever we talk about movies,he goes on praising the actresses'beauty and figure and everything, i know I know of course actresses are b'ful. And one time he was telling me about his ex and altho he hates his ex but he was complimenting her beauty a lot. And sometimes whenever I ask him about his female friends,he says 'they are amazing,awesome,wonderful' and stuff like that. Hearing all this I feel like **** bcuz he has never complimented me or said anything of that sort. I know m not that pretty. M average looking with an avg. Height and an avg. Figure but still I wud like that the person I love,would atleast make me feel that m beautiful to him. I see my friends boyfriends n how those guys praise them n show their love and seeing that its been over a year and he never does that to me,makes me feel so low n sad. I dont think I can tell this to my bf directly bcuz it seems selfish if I tell him that he never makes me feel b'ful. So please help me with this situation. Its really frustrating. And yes we are in a long distance relationship. So we get to meet only 2-3times a year so u can see how frustrated I am. First I dont get to see him so much and above all that I sometimes feel like **** in relationship.

[Nighthawk61]

Take the time that you have now to become more in tune with your inner self and develop yourself. Learn to have fun and laugh, hone your intelligence with challenges, have fun with hobbies, join a gym or a yoga class, always make friends and learn how to support others, develop your career in it's next stage. Understand assertiveness. See a psychologist and talk about your self esteem. Learn how to lover yourself. Absolutely, learn to give out what you want to come to you. Great point.

The fact is that your boyfriend has chosen you. He speaks highly of other women, and I doubt that he would choose a woman that was inferior to others that he appreciates. Why would he?

I like what the doctor has said, don't be a drag by expecting someone else to define you. You must define yourself. I'm sure that you are lovely. We all are in our own way. What is wrong with average height and figure, you say that like there's something wrong with it, but it is exactly the perfect statistics. I think that you should take this time that you have to yourself and talk to a therapist, make sure that you don't suffer from any mood disorders and read read read about overcoming an inferiority complex.

Take it easy and learn to laugh more, there is nothing in the whole world that is as much of an elixer of life than is a good sense of humor. You'll be guaranteed a find partner if you define yourself well and live life happily.
Best of luck sweetheart. Get excited and have fun, enjoy your life!!!

[Shelly Bullard]

Hi. I have one question for you: do you praise him? What is missing in relationships is often the very thing we are not giving. If you praise him (without the expectation to get anythign in return from him--just praise him because you love him) then it is likely he will treat you the same way, or you will find someone who will treat you the same way.

Also, you cannot rely on him to make you feel good about yourself. Feeling good about yourself--your self worth--is your responsibility. He will not make you feel beautiful if you don't already feel beautiful yourself. And as you said above, you don't. You have to start feeling beautiful, and then the compliments will come. It is not his job to make you feel worthy--in fact, to be completely honest, that will just turn him off.

Know that you are beautiful, shower him with your love, and then watch it return to you.