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381551 tn?1208754043

Age Differences!

I have a general question actually... are there a lot of couples with rather large age differences?  My fiance and I are ten years apart, almost to the day. We get along so well though.  We have a lot in common and enjoy doing a lot of the same things. I have always been more mature than the people my age.  But is this more common these days?  
8 Responses
Avatar universal
my best friend married a man 32 years diff. he was as old as her dad, and had 2 kids her age at the time, till this day i still dont know why she would marry a man that old, and she told me, he treats her like a queen and she feels sur, around him, like a father fig. to me it was strange, but they have 2 children and he is now72 and she is41 they are very happy and have a good life, i dont think age matters after 20, if he makes you happy good for you, after all it is hard to find a good man your luckylllllllll
173939 tn?1333217850
I don`t know what the statistics say about age difference but here are a few thoughts:
- if you marry a person for their inner value and compatibility, they could be any age in theory. You never know where love takes you.
- quite possible that there are more couples with much younger females than used to be
because in a materialistic world men like to add youth and beauty to their lives like another accessory. Sometimes mutual love is involved, often though people just assemble their lives like a checklist. Got a great job, a nice car, a huge house, well, what`s missing? A wife. Check.
- if the man is a lot older and you are still in your late teens, the man`s motivation can sometimes be to impress or control and take advantage of her naivite.
- if he is a lot older and you are past 20, security may be appealing or the wisdom of
"old age"
- sometimes the female is a lot older. Not talking about the cougar type here but serious relationships. Some tend to be calmer at an older age and that is what some men like or she shares more interests of the younger generation and naturally becomes part of that crowd.

Many ways to be happy....
What always touches me to see is when very very old couples are holding hands, enjoying each other`s conversation and energy.
Avatar universal
Im 25 and my boyfirend is 52. We get along great and have good life together. I still often worry about what happens when he gets older but I have to remind myslef that I get older too with each year that comes, and will no doubt change as I get older.
I would love to have a family and think that it should happen in the next few years if its going to have a better chance of working and being fair on the baby but time wil tell.

i have had a lot of problem with my family who have almost disowned me sometimes, but I have percevered and we still have a good relationship but they wont have anything to do with my partner. Everything is a compromise and its tough at times but we have been together for 5 years now and remain stronger by the day.
684030 tn?1415612323
The love of my life was 26 years older than me. The age factor came into play as it pertained to health issues... primarily, his. Plus, there were distinct generational differences (ie. taste in music). In social settings, people who didn't know us thought that we were father and daughter which, led to a few embarassing moments. And, his 3 sons had a problem with us, as they were all older than me. Sadly, this wonderful man died suddenly of a massive heart attack. But, I can say with certainty that I'd be with him, today, had he not died. Now, my previous boyfriend (we broke up 4 months ago) is the same exact age as myself (I'm 53). No generational difference there... but, our temperaments and personalities clashed. Interestingly, the 75 year old was far superior to the 53 year old, when it came to sexual performance. Currently, I'm seeing a man who's 5 years younger than me. So, age difference really isn't all that big a deal. The age difference is more socially accepted today than ever before... but, I think that some people are still having a hard time accepting... when the woman is the older one in the relationship.
740456 tn?1260449809
I'm 21 and my guy is almost 33. I get along with him better then i do with anyone else in my life. The age difference was a HUGE concern of mine when we started dating... but now it's something that doesnt even cross my mind.

I truly believe age is just a number, as long as he makes you happy and treats you well, go for it =)

479581 tn?1317757488
Hi....I'm new to this community but wanted to comment.

I'm 52, my husband is 61....we've been married 24 years; mostly happy

The truth is....it's been like losing 10 years of my life and living 10 years older which never seemed like a big deal until he turned 60.  In some ways I feel like I'm married to an old man.  Sometimes I resent the loss of my 50's.

If I was at the beginning....and didn't have my kids.....I'm not sure I would have married someone so much older.
362249 tn?1441315018
I think it just depends on the people and how you get along! I have to say i dont agree with a 20 something yr old marrying a 50 yr old man though at 20 you will want kids to go out have fun etc. but if it were like you were 40 and he was 50 you would have had time to grow up better and have kids! Its like when i see Adrienne Curry and her husband  they are like this almost 51 and shes 25 she wants to pursue her career he has no kids and wants some which i can see why so why did she not marry some1 her own age to have time for that!! Me personally i have dated guys older and younger and when it came to marriage both my X and my new husband are very close to my age almost exact! and i get along great my with husband we hardly ever fight! i only divorced my X because he had a drug addiction and after 4 yrs i could no longer deal as i wanted stabililty and life!! Again every1 is different in this situation!
Avatar universal
My husband and I have been married almost nine years.  I am 42 years old and he will be 62 years shortly.  We got along really well at first.  Many aspects of our relationship felt comfortable.  However, I have recently begun to resent the generational differences, probably in part because he is settled and I am ready to go and live life.  I think he sometimes internalizes our differences as something hurtful.  It's difficult.  There are also differences in music, as another poster mentioned, and taste for movies, television, etc.  I worry about being 65 years and nearing retirement and being married to someone who is 85 years and possibly not wanting to go far from home.  (In fact, he's kind of like that now.)  I love the guy.  Sadly, I'm just not sure it was was to marry him.  The spark just isn't really there for me.  And it's really, really difficult now that I'm married to think about divorcing this sweet man.  Please take time to really consider the issues at hand when you are in a relationship with a major age difference.  
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