Age difference Im 25 he's 22

[Supercitygirl]

Hi All

This may get winded with a few tangents. My first love was a man my age. Born 3 days after me. On and off love for 5 years before I had to leave him. No cheating or anything involved. He was just malicious and skipped my college graduation out of anger or disrespected and belittled me in front of our friends a lot. So I left. Fast forward, a few months ago I met a guy from Miami. He's 22, from the country and very similar to me in a lot of ways. I work 3 jobs to support myself and a big issue I had with exes was that I was more independant then them and my working caused a lot of issues. Not with this guy. He is very stable or seemingly so right now Ive only know him since Feb. Hes very kind to me. Culturally we are from very different walks of life. Hes from the country and Im Caribbean. We look strange together but we find it funny when people stare. Im on the darker side of olive tone he's more embrace the paste... lol... sorry.

Ok, my ex has recently made an attempt to come back into my life. I feel like no matter what he did, I still see the good in him. He wants me to move across the country with him, and be this girl that I never really was. He keeps saying things like "I left her to be treated good by you." Cause he was seeing someone. He says nothing about treating me well or making me happy just says he would forgive the past. Ive given up on him changing, and my question isnt really about him just giving back story.

My questions are this, is there anything wrong with this guy being 3 years younger or from a completely different background? and my other question is how do I tell my ex that he is not who I want anymore without hurting him like that past?

[Supercitygirl]

Thank you for answering my craziness. I get so stuck in over analyze mode and I forget to just let things happen. This new guy is a good guy and I'm always stupid for letting my ex back in my head. He's all in he says and Its me thats holding everything back. I have to let go of my past with the ex not nit pick everything about apart this relationship..... ahhh wooosaa

[hero65]

1st about the old guy relationships are a 2 way street u don't just give you also receive and from what you said he only gave you anger and frustration so i don't think you should even talk to him... forget about being civilized for a moment and remember the bad things he's done. he didn't even mention that he was gonna treat you differently because he knows that's a lie so i respect him for not lying at least
2nd about the new guy 3 years is not an age difference that could be a deal breaker as long as he's mature there's no problem :) what worries me is the cultural difference which can lead to a break up in the end but that doesn't mean you shouldn't try to be with him if he's half the man you say he is he's worth a shout :)
good luck :)

[AnnieBrooke]

Even if it does not ultimately work with your new guy (and I don't see why it would not be successful), you don't want the old guy.  Simply tell him (the old guy) that the time has gone by for him and you.  That shouldn't hurt his feelings, people do move on.

[specialmom]

I totally agree with tink.  This age difference is not a big deal.  It is hard to find someone to be compatible with----  if much of what you are looking for can be found in this person, his few years younger than you don't matter.  When  people are in their teen years, that age difference is a huge deal.  In the 20's and 30's, not so much.  good luck and hope it all works out for you!

[TTinKKerBBell]

I see no harm in a three year difference in age since You are both Adults.  If one of You were still a teenager I would have a different view.
The old BoyFriend (I'm glad You left that situation by the way) - You say You still see the good in Him - well, there's good in everyone, no one's A L L bad - but You tried that relationship and it didn't work well - lesson learned. So just tell Him nicely that You have moved on and have another relationship.
Good Luck with the "new" one.  
Regards