Aa
Am I a lesbian?
I'm 16 years old, when I was 14 I thought I started to like one of my friends which is a lesbian. I've kissed girls before and I liked it. I have a boyfriend now who I love to pieces but I strongly refuse to give head or toss him off. I don't know why I just am not comfortable at all doing that I have never tried it and I don't want to try it. So I just let him do stuff to me. But i feel like I would be more comfortable licking a girl out and fingering a girl (making love with a girl) than I would with a boyfriend but I love my boyfriend I am just really confused. Can someone help!?
There is PLENTY time for You to figure this out!!
There is NO rush!! The 16, 17 year old guy who has an erection just needs (wants) to get his rocks off!! and will say WHATEVER He thinks will enable Him to achieve that!!
You're 16!! I TRUELY don't understand why You are thinking about "giving head" or "tossing him off"!! or "licking or fingering a girl"!!!!! WE ARE NOT DEFINED BY WHAT KIND OF SEX WE HAVE!!! OR WHO WE HAVE IT WITH!!!
Call me "old fashioned" if You want HoneyGirl, but I assure You - You have a better chance of cementing a meaningful relationship (Boy OR Girl) if You exercise morals and standards and expect the same from ANY relationship You might decide to engage in. It is NOT about sex - I mean, EVERYONE/ANYONE can "have" sex - each and every one of us can
s*ck and f*ck - it's really, really not about that. It truely should be more meaningful than JUST "sex". "SEX" is even something You can do by YourSelf!! You don't need a partner for "sex". SEX is only meaningful in a deep, committed relationship - otherwise, it's only "meeting a need" as in we eat when we are hungry - we go to the bathroom when we need to relieve ourselves, we brush our teeth when they are unclean. What ever happened to holding sex "sacred" between 2 loving, committed people?? LET'S BRING MORALITY BACK!!
There is NO rush!! The 16, 17 year old guy who has an erection just needs (wants) to get his rocks off!! and will say WHATEVER He thinks will enable Him to achieve that!!
You're 16!! I TRUELY don't understand why You are thinking about "giving head" or "tossing him off"!! or "licking or fingering a girl"!!!!! WE ARE NOT DEFINED BY WHAT KIND OF SEX WE HAVE!!! OR WHO WE HAVE IT WITH!!!
Call me "old fashioned" if You want HoneyGirl, but I assure You - You have a better chance of cementing a meaningful relationship (Boy OR Girl) if You exercise morals and standards and expect the same from ANY relationship You might decide to engage in. It is NOT about sex - I mean, EVERYONE/ANYONE can "have" sex - each and every one of us can
s*ck and f*ck - it's really, really not about that. It truely should be more meaningful than JUST "sex". "SEX" is even something You can do by YourSelf!! You don't need a partner for "sex". SEX is only meaningful in a deep, committed relationship - otherwise, it's only "meeting a need" as in we eat when we are hungry - we go to the bathroom when we need to relieve ourselves, we brush our teeth when they are unclean. What ever happened to holding sex "sacred" between 2 loving, committed people?? LET'S BRING MORALITY BACK!!
The only thing I can add to any of the above is, it really doesn't matter what your sexuality is.... gay, bi, hetero.... it is yours and will one day be clearer than the air you breathe. There is a lot more acceptance these days in regards to being gay, and it is growing. One thing that I'd think you'd regret is trying to be something that you are not....
Take some time for yourself. Make some room with this boyfriend. Perhaps even give the relationship a break if you are questioning anything about that relationship.
Take some time for yourself. Make some room with this boyfriend. Perhaps even give the relationship a break if you are questioning anything about that relationship.
COMMUNITY LEADER
Hi. Okay, but you are still young and shouldn't have to do things with any boyfriend (or anyone) sexually that you don't want to. I'm sure that even in the UK they can say no.
It seems like a growing trend for girls to be 'into' other girls. It was taboo when I was in college and now it is like a cool thing to do --- make out with a girl and especially in pubic. For most, it doesn't really mean they want to spend their whole life with a woman. Some do though. If you are struggling with your sexuality, then as anniebrooke says, go online to some sites set up for this to try to help you get some clarity. Or you could speak to a counselor.
Or you could really relax about being sexual period and see where your mind is at after a break from it. Too much too soon can mess with ya. But again, I'm older and that is just my mindset on it. I do think some space of not being sexual at all will help you see things a little differently.
Because maybe the guy you are with just pushes you too much and you aren't 'that' into him and you aren't ready or willing to do what he wants. That is reasonable and shouldn't then make you think that this would apply for your entire life and to all men. good luck
It seems like a growing trend for girls to be 'into' other girls. It was taboo when I was in college and now it is like a cool thing to do --- make out with a girl and especially in pubic. For most, it doesn't really mean they want to spend their whole life with a woman. Some do though. If you are struggling with your sexuality, then as anniebrooke says, go online to some sites set up for this to try to help you get some clarity. Or you could speak to a counselor.
Or you could really relax about being sexual period and see where your mind is at after a break from it. Too much too soon can mess with ya. But again, I'm older and that is just my mindset on it. I do think some space of not being sexual at all will help you see things a little differently.
Because maybe the guy you are with just pushes you too much and you aren't 'that' into him and you aren't ready or willing to do what he wants. That is reasonable and shouldn't then make you think that this would apply for your entire life and to all men. good luck
I didn't reilize this was a American site as I'm british leagual age is 16 and I've finished school 'highschool' and now at collage I'm nearly 17 so yeh thanks for the help but I'm from the uk :)
There is absolutely no reason that a 16-year-old should be expected to give head or toss off her boyfriend.
Not wanting to do something that is pretty demeaning might just mean you have some dignity, not that you aren't interested in men.
That said, if you are interested in women sexually, I think there are some pretty good websites geared to gay and lesbian teenagers who are trying to figure this out. In other words, not porno or hook-up sites, but educational site designed for teenagers trying to make sense of this confusing issue. You might do some googling.
Not wanting to do something that is pretty demeaning might just mean you have some dignity, not that you aren't interested in men.
That said, if you are interested in women sexually, I think there are some pretty good websites geared to gay and lesbian teenagers who are trying to figure this out. In other words, not porno or hook-up sites, but educational site designed for teenagers trying to make sense of this confusing issue. You might do some googling.
COMMUNITY LEADER
I'm a bad one to talk to about this because at 16, I think you should be focusing on your school work.
Your not wanting to do something sexual may mean that you just aren't ready for it rather than you are homosexual. good luck
Your not wanting to do something sexual may mean that you just aren't ready for it rather than you are homosexual. good luck
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