Avatar universal

Does life give second chances?

Hello everyone...top forum, good advises... keep the good work!

I wanted to share my story. I am trying to cope with myself whilst I am writing. Also I must say that English is not my first language so bear with me should I make any mistakes.

To make it short and easy to understand to anyone: there are two girls. Girl A has been a long-time girlfriend (6 years +). We have been having a long distance relationship, for at least the last year, due to the fact I am working abroad in another country.  During the last months things have started to get complicated: argues over the phone, being bored to talk to each other, threats to end the relationship, “this is not working like this”, etc. I guess I was afraid to loose her, but it did not affect me much due to the fact that I knew she would never leave me because she loves me so much...

Girl B is a girl that I met where I am now. When things with girl A started to get complicated I started to date B and we have been having fun, in every sense. She likes me very much I would say and she is nice to be honest. Physically attractive and is doing medicine as a career within university.

I have slept with B a couple of times without telling A about what was going on. It was, obviously, using condoms. I can tell that nothing seem wrong during intercourse. What I am basically afraid of is that B could be pregnant, (maybe is just guiltiness, shame, fear...or real concerns perhaps) and I must be obliged to be with her for the rest of my life, as I have realised that I love A so much (I mean it) and I am having this extra-heavy strong feeling now that I know there is a chance to loose her forever...

If nothing goes wrong I will tell B to end dating and I will definitely marry A. She is the love of my life. I hope I could get a second chance here. I am so scared and afraid; I have not been able to sleep, eat nor to perform well at work due to this. Thank you very much for reading this, I will look forward to read replies,

Thanks once again
4 Responses
Sort by: Helpful Oldest Newest
Avatar universal
Ok....like the song said, "Guilty feet have got no rythm". That is what happens when you think you can have your cake and eat it too with 2 girls.  You are overly confident that A will not leave you, because she loves you too much, well, you don't know women too well and hell has no fury as a scorned woman. Be vary careful that your overly confident opinion of these too women will not back firing on you.

If you truly loved "A", you would have appreciated and respected her, not take advantage that you know she will not leave you, because she loves you too much (that seems very arrogant of you). Never take advantage of a woman just because she has show you emotions and are emotions of love.

If "B" is pregnant, it is because you took a risk and this is the price you pay for unprotected sex. If she is pregnant you must do the right thing and for once in a relationship, be responsible (which, you have not shown in your relationship with the woman you realized you loved "A"). You love her now, because you are scared of the choice you made and finally realizing that she will leave you. The only thing to do at this point is wait and see if B is pregrant, if she is and decides to keep the baby, make sure to have a DNA test to prove it is yours.

I hope this experience will teach you that you should never play with peoples emotions and when being unfaithful, someone is going to lose and be hurt by your actions. Be very careful that the person that will get hurt, might be you....good luck.  Judy
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hi Judy,

Thanks for replying. I really appreciate it. I am in Europe and still awake...:(

I am not an arrogant person. Maybe the way I expressed myself was a bit direct and dry. I wanted to summarise all the info as much as i can and put the facts on the table. Perhaps it wasn't the best thing to call girls A and B

I did use condoms when sleeping with B. Still I believe I made a great mistake. I'm not a player, i've just slept with two girls in my whole life. I'm young, recently graduated from uni. Whatever happens I will do the right thing...

Thanks once again for your comments...
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hi SpaCat. It's 7:54 pm (Chicago time USA). I visited Paris and Lourdes, France this past August. Beautiful country and I hope to visit Israel soon. You are still young and as  human we all make mistakes and I apologize that I am pretty straight forward at times, but harmless.  I'm happy to hear that whatever happends you will do the right thing and if "B" is not pregnant, I hope you will try to work things out with "A" and be faithful. You are still young and have alot ahead of you. Seek stability in life and a career and everything else will fall in to place.  Good Luck, Judy
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
If there is nothing more between the accidental conception of a child, a long term relationship will not work, no matter what the best intentions are. Hopefully, the feared event will not have happened and all will be well.  You may be young but you know right from wrong.  For all you know, the gal A, has already founds someone else also? Long term relationships rarely work longterm either. Best of luck.
Helpful - 0
Have an Answer?

You are reading content posted in the Relationships Community

Top Relationships Answerers
13167 tn?1327194124
Austin, TX
3060903 tn?1398565123
Learn About Top Answerers
Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
Ask a question
Popular Resources
How do you keep things safer between the sheets? We explore your options.
Can HIV be transmitted through this sexual activity? Dr. Jose Gonzalez-Garcia answers this commonly-asked question.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Condoms are the most effective way to prevent HIV and STDs.