Friends or more

[she90]

Do I ike him as more than a friend and does he like me?
I started liking a guy last year thru mutual friends after my ex and I broke up.In many ways I thought he liked me too because he gave me a nick name and was always really nice to me, gave me attention and felt like he was always looking at me. In the end i had had enough and i asked him if he like me. He said no and apologized if he had made me think so, when he asked how i thought it, i said I was joking and not to worry. He became distant for a while and recently we have gone back to being friends again.
Last week he moved in as we have a spare room in our home and he needed somewhere to live. I thought it would be fine as I only used to like him. then this evening we were out with a group of mates and i saw him pay one of my female friends more attention, i even caught him smiling at her from a distance. It hurt like crazy and made me realize im stuck in this place all over again.
We stayed up last night watching a dvd till 1am, a romantic comedy. I told my other guy mate in the morning and he joked about the guy liking me.
I hate feeling like this, and I find it even harder now that he is staying in my house. He texted me this evening saying he won't be home tonight and to pass it onto the person who needed to know even though he has their number.
I know i am being parinoid and reading into pretty much everything but please help. I caught him looking at me this evening with the other girl around and he looked away really fast when I looked at him. I don't know what to think. Is he keeping his distance now because he thinks i like him or because he doesn't like me, or because he does and thinks its better not to be around me so much when we live together too as it could be awkward?
any advice would be great because im sick of over thinking, jumping to conclusion and looking like a hopeless teenager when im in my 20s.

[she90]

Cool thanks for feedback :) I'm not too upset that it doesn't mean anything,just curious so all good :)

[Ashelen]

yes this reminds me exactly of my grade school crushes. some led to relationships... most didnt. a guy who says he doesnt like you like that....doesnt like you like that. eye contact means zip. i have a male friend who i hold eye contact with a lot because im usually indicating silently that hes being weird. it ends with us both laughing, but its just a way that we communicate... we have noooo romantic attachment. im far too pregnant, married, and old for his tastes.. and hes too much of a sleazy playboy for mine. point being... eye contact is just another communication method.no more, no less. i advise letting go... you are setting yourself up for heartache.

[specialmom]

Sweatie, he could have been saying "that girl keeps staring at me" to his friend.  It is easy to make eye contact with someone we keep looking at.  They sense it and look and then notice you staring and you "lock" eyes.  Then you are left to interpret it however you want.  You think you are having a 'moment' and he may be thinking 'what the heck'.  His actions of saying nothing to you are telling.  If he changes his mind and wants to have more with you, he'll let you know by actually approaching you.  He sounds like the honest sort who said he wasn't interested once . . . so I'm sure he'd be comfortable telling you if he changed his mind.  

My opinion is that you have a crush and you should move for now.  goodluck!

[Londres70]

I am sorry dear, in my opinion you reading still way too much into this situation.  Who knows what he said, however, it was something he didn't want you to hear (not sure whether what he said was good or bad).  

I think you are obsessing over this too much and I would recommend not "torturing" yourself.  

[she90]

I saw this friend again on the weekend, there was a big group of us around a bonfire just singing and chilling. He was on the other side of the fire and we made eye contact and we held it for what seemed like forever before I looked away.We kept exchanging glances and every time id look away and smile incase anyone noticed. He didnt come closer to be near to me coz it was all guys on one side and all girls on the other so would have been too obvious.We were at a camp with a bunch of people and the guys were making lots of noise when we were all heading to sleep, I texted him asking if they could be a bit quieter. In the morning he asked me if I heard him talking to his friend, as in worried I heard him. I know i am probably jumping the gun, but if he was talking about me and was worried I heard, would that be why he asked if I heard him? Or just something he didn't want me to know in general?

[Londres70]

Agree with Specialmom; this is a Classic "crush"  

"I know i am being parinoid and reading into pretty much everything but please help. I caught him looking at me this evening with the other girl around and he looked away really fast when I looked at him. I don't know what to think."  Dear,  I will agree you are reading too much into this and I don't get any thing more than friendship at this time.  This could change, however, unless he VERBALLY tells you different cherish the friendship.  

[specialmom]

Hi dear.  Hey, I think you took the big leap and asked him his feelings and he was honest with you.  That hurts, but he likes you as a good friend.  

We can sense, usually, when someone is into us.  And he probably knew that all along and likes the way it feels.  We all do.  It is often the 'secondary gain' component in a friendly male female relationship.  I have a friend that is gorgous and always had these guy friends that she didn't like in a romantic way but enjoyed their attention.  

It stinks to have him living in your house as watching your crush go about life is hard.  It will take his hooking up one time in front of you to get over it.  (I hope so anyway).  

I think I would do your best to stay busy and see him as a friend.  If his feelings change, he'll let you know through his words and actions that are very obvious rather than just the friendly gestures he makes now.  

I'm sorry hon.  I've had crushes in my day too.  They are fun until they hit too close to home and feel like rejection.  Peace