This is not a question... just some advice :)

[andreab19]

I have only lived on this earth for 19 years but have learned many important things over the last few months.
If you are needing more from your relationship, like more affection, more attention, more whatever...
YOU HAVE TO ASK FOR IT!!! ESPECIALLY if you are a female dating a male! Guys are dumb when it comes to figuring out what a girl wants. All girls are different and his previous girlfriend may have trained him to do something you absolutely hate! I have had two relationships where I was not satisfied in the affection department. I told both guys that I needed more, they promised to change, but nothing changed. Know what I did? I dumped them.
If they can't or won't give you what you need, get rid of them! Life is too short and there are TOO MANY guys out there that can what you want and need!

Oh yeah, one more thing. If there is something specific you want for your birthday, Christmas, V-day, etc...
TELL HIM ABOUT IT!!! Don't just say, "It doesn't matter" unless it truly does not matter. Most girls want some pretty jewelry on holidays... tell him what kind, tell him where he can find it. Guys are dumb about gift buying too! They don't know what you want! That is why they ask :)

[VicUser]

You are so right we are dumb about girls. After 50 years on this Earth and 29 yrs of marriage I am still clueless, the rules keep changing but I think that is in the female playbook somewhere. "If he figures out what makes you happy, change it"

[iam1butterfly]

You offer interesting insights... and, I think that what you outlined has a measure of practical application. However, what changes the dynamics of all that you mentioned
is when you "fall in love."  When you fall in love, it's not so easy to demand then "dump" the guy because he's clumsy, awkward and seemingly "dumb" about gifts and measuring up to one's expectations.
Yes, your advice will work... as long as you're not in love.

[lovemykids465]

I think when you hit a certain age or even level in your relationship material things do not matter. Faithfulness, attention and affection are way more important. Don't get me wrong gifts are great but a card, a letter a poem are way better if they truly express their feelings.

[mami1323]

Lol I didn't mean to sound harsh at all I just know how different my views on relationship were at 19 to now at 32 with a child.

[Judy246]

LOL...your cute!  I guess I'm old enough to be your mom and as the years past and you hit our age, you live, learn, mature and earn life experience to know what to accept in a man and what not to accept .Gift giving should be from the heart and appreciated no what how bad (lol) it can be, because a lot of guys that age don't know what to give, so, communication is key in all relationships and telling him in advance is not a bad idea  and I totally agree with you that you can't expect or assume a guy will automatically know what you want or need. They are clue less until with life experience they will get better and be more sensitive to our needs, but go ahead and tell him what you like, want, but remember, gift giving is something free will and if he doesn't give you anything, they he is either broke and can't afford it, cheap and doesn't want to spend or is not into you that much....good luck and don't worry, there is soooo much ahead at that age, so just enjoy life and have fun. Judy

[raquelplus2]

lol mami your too funny!!

[mami1323]

I guess at 19 we all think we know so much...lol.  Please don't take offense to that but like Ashelen says, it's easier to say just walk away when you are not married or have kids.  Relationships are hard but a lot harder when you factor in real commitment.  At 19 you haven't live enough to be able to really say much about how to behave in a relationship.  You haven't had enough experience yet.  Not that I'm saying what you said isn't correct, people should walk away if their needs aren't being met but there is a lot more to it than that.  Communication is essential in every relationship, all relationships have ups and downs and are a lot of work.  You can't just walk away when things get tough.  

As far as telling what gifts you want, well, we should only hope that the man we are with knows us well enough to know what we want or what we like.  At my age, I would settle for a nice card with a sweet note over a material object.  But in my relationship, what gift I'm getting is the least of my worries.  

[Ashelen]

Hi...I agree with you for the most part (I'm 24) but unfortunately the first bit of advice is a big oversimplification. A lot of times, relationships or situations are too complicated to just "ask for it" or "tell him you need it", and you can't just "break up with him" if you're married, and especially if you have children. So while the advice is good in a general sense, it doesn't apply to a lot of situations. Also, the older you get the more pressure you feel to not remain alone in a lot of cases, and the less likely you are to press your desires and needs, in the fear that you'll end up alone. Like I said, I'm young too so none of what I've said has ever really been a problem of mine, but sadly that's the truth in a lot of relationships...it's just not that simple. But a good general rule :).

As for your second bit of advice: absolutely!!!! If you don't get what you want because you "expected him to know or guess" you're a fool and deserve socks or ear-muffs! I couldn't agree more about that, hehe :).