Interracial? still Taboo?

[blkness06]

Hi I was married 17 yrs to a wonderful woman and mother of my kids. I am black as she is to. I was divorced this year and am dating. No sexual partner just kissing. I have found myself losing interest in women of the same race. I have had an attraction towards white and Latino women but don't know the first step in meeting and or asking them out without violating some cultural taboo....need help

[sweetpea03]

Very true.. hadn't really thought about it. I live in Calif., so no one really cares and it happens all the time for there to be interracial couples. That isn't the case in other areas of the country...

[RockRose]

My first thought was,  well,  it depends on where you live.  So I clicked in to your profile - UGH,  Tulsa.  Not the best place for Black men to date White women.  In fact,  aside from tiny towns in the deep south or in East Texas,  I can't imagine a worse place for interracial dating.  

If you're interesting in dating white women,  and can move to a more tolerant area,  I'd suggest large cities on either coast,  or Austin Texas,  or Chicago,  where almost everyone is open minded about relationships.

[specialmom]

Ha------------ really love that term anniebrooke---------  attraction package!  Clever way of putting that.  And we all do have that attraction package we seek.  Sometimes we look beyond it and that is probably a good thing but often it starts with the package.  

[AnnieBrooke]

I like the others' advice, though if skin color is that important to you, then you have to just accept that it's part of your attraction package (like "big boobs" or "nice legs" might be to some guys) and live accordingly.  (Heck, some white women would be excited about dating a black guy, too.)  It might also be your way of letting your first wife be a "one and only" without a rival or successor who seems just like her.   But if you want a serious relationship, it's not about the superficial in the end.  (In this context, I'd say the superficial even includes physical attributes that turn you on.)  Long-term relationships come from the inside, and interracial relationships take a lot of talking and understanding, so each person really knows what the other person's experience of the world is.  It can happen, but you both really have to listen and understand.  

That all said, even if all else is falling into place well, if you live in an overtly racist place, I would be cautious.  The first poster implied that racism doesn't come into play any more, but it can be a serious problem for an interracial couple in a smaller town.  In the bigger cities, there is sort of a veneer over it (an African-American friend of mine says that in the bigger cities, it's still there, it's just more subliminal).   So a lot would depend on how sophisticated your town (and your crowd) is.

[sweetpea03]

Race really does not matter and rarely do people care about it. I am in an interracial relationship as well as many of my friends. Though I do want to say that you should not be dating a woman purely based on her race. I hope you will look for a woman you are compatible with and share interests/values with. Just meet people and then see who is attractive to you as a person. good luck

[brice1967]

Not trying to be a jerk dude, but the race thing is on you.  Either a woman digs you or not kid.... that simple.

[teko]

So in other words, curiosity? Is this a sexual fantasy of yours? Otherwise I would think you would be more interested in meeting a great person, but it sounds more like you want to feed a fantasy of sorts.

[TTinKKerBBell]

You are attracted towards "White and Latino women" while "losing interest in Women of the same race".

Your statement is about color - yet compatible Women come in ALL colors.  I question more that you AREN'T attracted to a Black Woman than I do that you ARE attracted to White and Latino?  She's whoever She is FIRST - Her color is SECONDARY.

Good Luck  

[AHP84]

I'm not really seeing how you interpret a cultural taboo for interracial dating between the white and black race? I'm not entirely sure about black and Hispanic, but, being a white female...I guess I've never realized there was a cultural taboo for interracial dating with any race. If I were not married and wanted to date, then I'd date whomever I felt compatible with and to whom I was attracted, no matter what their race.
Then again, I have quite a broad age gap with you and live in a different part of the US (I'm in Alabama), so maybe I find this situation a bit different for my generation and location.
My advice would be to try an online dating site. As far as I know, those give you the option of having a racial preference for dating.
Other than that, I'd say just forget the taboos, and if you find someone who is attractive and interests you, then just start talking to them. Get to know them through some time and conversation, then just ask for a date.
It can't be that bad... ;-)