NEEDS INFO ASAP!!!

[Michele2135]

My boyfriend contacted me the other day telling me he was extremely concerned that he was taken advantage of while passed out.  He "supposedly" has a 12 hour blackout period and doesn't remember anything.  he woke up at home, in bed, naked, which is not normal (he doesn't sleep naked).  I find out that someone we know brought him home, she at first told a few people some explicit details of what she thought maybe happened, then hours later she wasn't sure if anything happened.  
I should also mention there was heavy alcohol drinking, some cocaine, and  an excess of prescription drug use (kolonipin) I believe snorting the pills.
Long story short, what are the necessary tests that can be done to figure out if he had sex or anything?  He went to the doctor in fear of loosing me, I was too pissed to go with so I'm not sure exactly what was tested for or what the tests were called.  Can anyone tell me the names of them or give me more information???  He said  hadn't showered and it had been about 36 hours since the possible sexual encounter.
PLEASE I NEED ANSWERS!!!!!!!!!!!

[nursegirl6572]

Oh boy.

I agree 100% with the replies you have gotten from the above posters (hi el!  :0))

You need to run, not walk away from this relationship.

What you describe isn't "partying", it's a suicide mission, and EXTREMELY irresponsible and risky.  God only knows what he did in the 12 hours he has NO recollection.  Think about it...heck, he could have killed someone for all you know!!  I also agree that playing the victim shows his character.  He could have easily been a consenting partner, OR he could have even assaulted someone else.  With that kind of substance abuse, all bets are off.  Too many "what ifs" to be comfortable sticking around IMO.

If you decide to stay with him, don't have any kind of unprotected sex with him until he receives conclusive STD test results.  He can discuss that with the doctor.  An HIV test will be conclusive at 3 months.

I wish you the best.

[el_em_en_oh]

I agree with the poster above me (and everyone else, for that matter).

He cheated on you and is now trying to cover his tracks.

1) don't sleep with him, as he might give you something he picked up when he had sex with whomever he had sex with
2) this probably isn't the first time he's done it
3) dump his a$$ as soon as possible, as he sounds like bad news
4) there are no tests for guys that can test for 'recently had sex'

[unknown_jones]

I don't know your bf but this story sounds highly suspect.  It is more likely that after heavy partying with drugs and alcohol he cheated on you with mutual friend and now that he has sobered up is trying to cove his trcks and save your relationship.  Didn't you say the other girl has been telling people details, perhaps he didn't want you to find out and was just trying to come up with any story you may believe.  Under what circumstances did he tell you about the blackout? Did you hear what the mutual friend was telling people and bring it to his attention or did he just wake up and tell you the story?  I agree with everyone else that this is not a healthy relationship.  Who knows what else goes on while he's "partying" and yes it could endanger you if he gets a disease and passes it along.  Drugs and alcohol seriously lowers your inhibitions and I'm very doubtful that protection would be used.  If your not in to drugs and alcohol then I'd start looking for a new bf.

[TTinKKerBBell]

Maybe He had sex with another girl, maybe He didn't
but what we DO know for sure is that

He had a 12 hour blackout!!
There was HEAVY alcohol drinking,
EXCESS prescription drug use,
cocaine, snorting

so....... what's wrong with a little sex? (sarcasm intended!!)

I agree with Londres70's:  Numbers 1 and 2 !!

[AnnieBrooke]

By all means, don't sleep with him again, he might give you an STD.

[RockRose]

I agree with the others,  the least of your worries is whether he was sexually assaulted (I guess that's what he's trying to allege?)

Who knows if he even went to the doctor.  

For his sake,  he probably should get screened for STDs and hope no one slaps him with a paternity suit in 9 months.

[Londres70]

I am not sure what "answers" you are looking for.  

Are you upset because he had sex with someone else OR are you upset because he could of been sexually assaulted?  Then, how does he know if he wasn't the one who initiated the sex especially if he was high?

"Long story short, what are the necessary tests that can be done to figure out if he had sex or anything?".........He should be addressing these questions to a physician and/or the police if he thinks he was sexually assaulted, although he probably won't look too credible being he was under the influence of alcohol and illicit drugs.  In fact, he could end up be charged if the illicit drugs are found still in his system.  

"He went to the doctor in fear of loosing me, I was too pissed to go with so I'm not sure exactly what was tested for or what the tests were called.  Can anyone tell me the names of them or give me more information???"..........Can't you just ask the bf about what tests were done if he already had them done or doesn't he remember that?  I am sure the physician probably ran a toxicology screen and if he did it won't be good for your bf if the drugs didn't clear his system.

"I should also mention there was heavy alcohol drinking, some cocaine, and  an excess of prescription drug use (kolonipin) I believe snorting the pills."...........Good heavens, that's enough to kill a horse.  

The best thing you can do for yourself and him is:

1.  Give him the name and number of a great therapist who deals with drug abuse and drug addicts.

Then.....

2. Leave him.

[specialmom]

I'd dump your boyfriend for partying like that.  No thank you.  I really don't like people that lose total control and don't find this to be a desirable thing in a 'mature' and real partner.  

so, who knows if he had sex.  If she was way drunk and messed up high too, then it was most likely mutual.  He confessed to it but played a complete victim.  I don't really buy that.  His being out of his mind high and drunk makes him unsure of what happened and he could have even been the instigator.  

so, in all honesty.  I'd not ignore this red flag.  I'd find a boyfriend that you don't have to worry he'll get that out of control.  good luck