Someone please answer my question seriously.

[Denny_Moraga]

Hey there. To start off, I'ma 17 year old guy. I know this might not necessarily be a medical question but hey, it's probably the best forum that will give me a REAL answer. I asked the same question on Yahoo Answers and the responses were repulsive. Hopefully I'll end up with a better one here. So. My question is: Am I seriously the only guy that doesn't look at porn or masturbate? My friends tell me I am weird, that I am gay or just a huge fag but I AM not into guys or any of that sort of thing. I am not gay. Is it normal not to do these things? Are there any guys out there like me in this way? I feel very left out. Like an outcast. I feel as if I'm the only strange one at my school that isn't into pornography or masturbation. The people on Yahoo Answers just ended up telling me the same thing "Dude you are crazy! There's no such thing as a male who doesn't look up porn or whack off and yes, you are a weirdo, get a life you fag." That really irritated me. That just made me aggravated. Really? Am I just the only guy in this world that doesn't do that stuff? Even my girlfriend is assured that all guys do it. It upsets her that the vast majority of males are porn watchers or masturbators. I want her to know that I don't do that. I wish she understood that I was different. Another thing, she thinks I fantasize about girls and lust over wanting other females. No. No I do not and that really hurts me for her to think that I do that. It's like her mind is programmed to think every guy is the same. Well I am not like all the guys at school or in the world. Man, I care for her so much, she is my world. I am happy with her. I couldn't ask for anything better than her. Why? Because she's different. She's not like all the other follower, barbie wannabes. She's smart, she has a great heart, she loves writing and going to museums and watching operas, she loves the Fine Arts. Doesn't sound like the average teenage gal much but that's what I LOVE about her, man.She's so different. In so many ways I could go on and on about all those good qualities she has. The only "bad" quality she has is how she believes that I do the things that all the other guys do. How do I convince her that I'm not like them? I hate how people say I fantasize about girls. Why do they say this? I am satisfied with who I have.  Someone please answer this question seriously.

[teko]

I think it sad when we consider it normal to masterbate and watch porn and then call someone who doesnt get into it a fag. I mean, How sad is that? And for young girls to think that ALL guys are like this and accept it as being part of being male? Now that is sad... I seriously think we have regressed with all this sex stuff of late. I agree with the poster who said it sounds like you have standards, morals, and character. I would take a guy like that any day of the week over a popeyed guy staring at a computer screen and whackin it all the time. I mean really? I say ignore it all and be who you are, and apologize to absolutely no one for it either!.

[TTinKKerBBell]

I think You are perfect!!

Who determines what is "normal"??   Is it the person who thinks YOU are doing something different from what HE"S doing so, therefore, he tells You that YOU are the one who's not "normal"??!!  Maybe, just maybe,  it's your CHARACTER that is above the norm!!

I DON'T THINK YOU HAVE A LOWER TESTOSTERONE LEVEL THAN OTHER GUYS!!

I THINK YOU HAVE STANDARDS!!

AND MORALS!!

AND CHARACTER!!  

and I REALLY want to go on record here as saying I admire Your conviction not to do/be what everyone else "thinks" is the norm in order to look/feel/act "normal".  Who the heck has defined "normal"??  -- Is it the person who wants to believe HE is "normal" and thinks everyone else should behave as HE does??

Our society has become VERY permissive/promiscuous -  It's all about ME, ME, ME - satisfy ME - gratify ME - often at the expense of others.

I would say to You - that EVERYONE can F*CK and S*CK - what "feels" good in the moment is momentary and even pointless - Your standards are obviously above and beyond that - and I admire that You possess the standard to stand up to Your conviction even in the face of others who say You are not "normal" to want to "get down and get dirty"

THE REWARDS WILL BE YOURS.......WITHOUT THE REGRETS!!

Regards,
Tink

[el_em_en_oh]

Yahoo Answers isn't the best place to go for serious answers to serious questions.

Here you'll get honesty, brutal at times, but honesty none the less (but respect and politeness at the same time).

You are who you are, and if you don't adhere to the social norms of how one SHOULD or SHOULDN'T act, so be it.

Be true to yourself, my friend.

(Sounds cheesy, I know, but there you go!)

[brice1967]

Denny, be true to yourself.  If you don't watch porn or masturbate, then you just don't do it.  You owe nobody an apology and this doesn't make you weird.

I'd think your girlfriend would be far more concerned with how you treat her and your character rather than if you masturbate or not.  Be a gentleman, keep treating the young lady right and don't pass judgement yourself.  Be true to you!

[AnnieBrooke]

Maybe you can't (or should not bother to) convince your girlfriend that you don't masturbate, but you can certainly focus on showing her what a great guy you are, and she'll just think how lucky she is and sooner or later will relax her suspicions that you are looking at other girls and all.  It's really nothing to fly off the handle about if she does think you do, since you don't.  If you want to be a great boyfriend, listen to what she cares about and stay interested in her concerns, be there for her and watch her back in all situations (especially emotionally).  You'll be a great boyfriend and she'll think she's way better off than other girls who have self-centered horndogs for boyfriends.  The question of masturbation will not bother her or even come up.

[cheshchesh819]

If you are happy with who you are then ignore all these people who calls you names and says these things about you,if they choose to do these things then so do it if people choose not to do it then thats ok too,as for your girlfriend if she truly knows you she will trust you no matter what,just ignore them all your life your choice

[Ashelen]

Yes, it can be completely normal. You may simply have a lower testosterone level than other guys, OR you may simply have a mind that works a different way. Most men have sexual desires because their body reactions to stimuli (or sometimes nothing) and they react to THAT. However, women generally react to sex mentally first and physically second. Some men do the same thing. That doesn't make you gay, or a freak, and in fact to be honest I think that any girl would be lucky to have you as a boyfriend because most women don't want their husbands masturbating or looking at porn if they're not ok with it.

i think that this girl will just have to come around on her own. i have dated guys before who SWORE they were different...who SWORE they didn't like porn or need to masturbate, but they did...so as a result, I've become wary of believing any guy about that. My husband swore those things when we were dating, but I knew he did. And he does. So the truth is, it's going ot be hard to convince her that you're different and mere words are probably not going to do it. SO just give her time and hopefully she'll come around. Be sensitive, be thoughtful, tell her the things about her that you treasure and hopefully by pointing out the things you value in a woman she'll begin to realize that you think differently.

No, you're not a freak. yes, you're normal.