When having a bad day, want to be cheered up or left alone?

[specialmom]

When things aren't going right in general or something 'bad' happens, how do you like to deal with it?  Do you like someone to try to cheer you up or do you like to be left alone?  

[Jade59]

I would like for someone to pay attention and listen to me whine for as long as possible...until I'm all whined out, THEN depending on who it is, and how close we are and their ability to understand where I'm coming from and  listening to them understand me instead of saying things like 'things will be better tomorrow', etc, does not cheer me up, but ends up irritating me.    

Music though, music works, too.  Rock, Metal or Grunge and as loud as possible so all I'm able to think about is the music in the moment.  I've been using that coping skill since I was very young.  

[dominosarah]

Nirvana, Alice in Chains grunge?

[specialmom]

Love it.  I'm also touched by music.  My teen son is going through a rough day and I just took him my phone and headphones to listen to a song.  He was like "no".  lol  He doesn't feel like my music soothes his soul.  I think he's missing out.  I loved my hair bands of the 80's but these days I tend to turn on hip hop and rap.  SO weird.  But if I feel like dancing and imagine myself skinny doing it, I feel better.  

I like the grunge age of music too but when I hear grunge, I think of dirt I need to clean.

I am not helpful here, am I?

[dominosarah]

I like to be left alone, with music, loud

[mombojombo]

I like to be distracted for as long as possible.  Helps me cope.

[specialmom]

When people try to cheer me up, I almost feel like I have to act cheered up in order to please them.  Sigh. Act is the key word there. And in reality, I'm just waiting until I'm alone to lick my wounds.  My husband wants to be cheered up.  I do it for him and then he tries to reciprocate and I'm like, sorry but no thank you.  

[Pink5622]

Hi specialmom! I would like some company not to cheer me up but for somebody to listen. I don't mean to be mean but I especially do not like optimistic and overly- enthusiastic-about-life-people around me when I am down. That annoys me more.

[specialmom]

Hey, I understand completely!  I feel like I am 'faking it' when people try to cheer me up and I'm legit upset.  If someone just will put up with my sadness, anger or distress and be there in a kind way to support me without the expectation that "I cheer up", then I can appreciate them.  Otherwise, ya, no thanks.  I hear you!  

[Emily_MHManager]

LEFT. ALONE.

I want to vent about it for a few to get it out of my system, and then I need to be by myself to recharge from it.

The exception may be is if someone wants to plant me at the beach. Then I can be with other people, but really, still don't talk to me.