husband indecision about getting pregnant

[cashew529]

My husband and I decided a year ago that we would start trying to get pregnant this summer. (I wanted to try last year and he wanted to wait so we waited). Now that I am off the pill he is very apathetic about it. After saying in the past that he wanted kids now he acts like he doesn't and says that kids are just an inevitable part of being married. I am really excited about getting to be a mom but I am worried about him being happy. Anyone (guys especially) go though a similar time and how did dad react after that baby was born?

[Autistic4Life]

There was a similar situation like this in my household.  I was born Higher Functioning Autistic, it is a neurological disorder that often follows genetics of families.  You can just imagine my fears about fathering children, and what if they aren't born "normal"?!  Here is what my wife did.  She got together with some friends and setup a picnick at a park.  While we were there she brought over a friend's baby and in her nudging way she made me hold the baby.  She snuggled up to me.  And as I held the baby she reminded me of how wonderful it would be to hold a baby that had my own dna in it; my own son or daughter that I could hold and cherish all the time, not just at the park!  By the way she specifically picked out a very friendly, outgoing, and smiling baby boy!  Having that tiny person in my arms instantly reminded me of why we have babies!  To bring a new human into the world and to nurture them and provide for them!  You think life is everything when you can have all the latest stuff.... but you really find out what it means to "provide" when you father a child!  Your husband is probably easily distracted by work and sports and friends and especially bills!  So you might try what my wife did.  Remind him why we become fathers!  My children were born with severe Autism Disorder and they need alot of care and alot of attention.  But trust me; seeing those beautiful little people, whether healthy or not, just having them in my life makes everything so much more worth living for!  I was very upset when I found out my daughter was severely Autistic when they diagnosed her.  But a father's heart can learn to adapt to anything!  If I am deployed for six months I find myself longing to hear that awful shrilling of my daughter!  Because she's mine all mine!  I have grown to love that awful sound, because that is my daughter, no other sounds like her.  She's my Autistic Princess!

You see, all you have to do is bring out the Father's heart in your husband.  You let a vulnerable man be around a happy smiling baby and he'll suddenly remember what it means to be Daddy, and how much every man does want to be father and have that legacy to raise up a new generation after himself, planting all of his wisdom and know-how into that child!  You just need to awaken the Father's heart within him. ;)

[margypops]

You know this isnt unusual , men do get a bit scared when the issue is upon them so to speak , carry on with your plans I think you will find he will warm to the idea .It is an exciting time, let him come round you it in his own time, when he sees you so happy it will brush off on him ..hey Congrats for the future baby

[cashew529]

We are 26-27 and have been married 3 years.