i like my cousin, but its wrong

[kiki338]

Im 26 going on 27, I am married and have a 15mnth old daughter. My husband is a good person although sometimes I feel like we don't do anything new and that maybe he is bored with me. Anyways, Lately I have been thinking about someone else and I even have dreams that I am making out with this person. And when I am awake I would like him to contact me so we could get closer. The worst part is that this is my cousin that I have been thinking about and although he has never said he likes me. When I was younger he called me and we would just stay on the phone every night. I hate this. I don't want to feel like this. Any thoughts?

[specialmom]

You're welcome.  As you can see, it sounds like a really bad idea from unbiased folks.  Stick to your guns and don't let thoughts that are destructive lead to actions that are even more so.  peace and luck

[kiki338]

Thanks for your advice, maybe I needed it to just get it off my chest.

[specialmom]

Is this post for real?  Your heading says it all---  it is wrong.  On several levels.  

I will never condone cheating in any way.  If someone is unhappy in their marriage, they don't have to stay married.  Then they sererate, divorce and when that is final, can date.

Date. That does not mean going for people that are around us and easy.  Like a cousin.  If you live in the US, dating your cousin would not be the norm and would most likely cause a bunch of family drama.

Focus on your marriage.  Understand that you have to give to get.  The nicer you are to him, the nicer he may be to you.  The more you try to spend time with him and liven things up between you, the more he may do the same back.  Compliment him.  Think about him and how you two can be happy.  

Because obsessive thoughts of your cousin undermines that.  

I agree that the cousin is a bad idea and you know it and you need to stop that line of thinking immediately.  

good luck

[BluCrystal]

Yes, concentrate very hard on making your marriage work.  Do something every day that is good for your marriage, like preparing a nice dinner, leaving him a love note, putting the baby to bed a bit early so you can be alone with the man you married.  Think alot about why you married him and all of the wonderful things about him.  Your cousin is a bad idea, and you know it.  Stop that train of thinking right now.  You are married.  Keep it that way. :-)  Blessings for you and your family - Blu

[Life360_Dave]

Hi and welcome. There is nothing wrong with fanticies as are healthy. Also marriages do go through stages like your experiencing. Alot of it has to do with being comfortable in ones own home. Most of the excitement in relationships is in the begining as are trying to win the other over. Dont be to concerned about this down time in your marriage but try to increase your financial wealth.
With  your cousin, fanticies are healthy but it would be best to not think of him in this way. Dont dwell on these thoughts as nothing good will come out of it.