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Avatar universal

is it too young for a engagement, marriage or a baby?

I'm almost 18 and my boyfriend is going to be 21. we've been dating for a long while now, and I would like to know if getting engaged or married young is good or bad? he wants to wait at least 2 more years and then have a baby before being engaged/married. and I told him I at least wanted to be engaged. what are your feelings on this?
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Avatar universal
I don't understand why women give men babies prior to a "real commitment" i.e. marriage.  Plus, why would he ask you to do this?  Strange.  

Pregnancy, delivery and then the rearing of children is not easy or cheap. If you are going to do all this it should be with a husband, not a bf or a fiance.  

Figure yourself out first, get your lives sorted out SEPARTELY, and then think about a husband/marriage.  

RockRose has a point about your generation and kids/marriage.  I mean, why would you bring a baby into this world when being so young because you don't have anything to really offer the child?

You are too young in my opinion.  
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Avatar universal
I'd say it's too early to be engaged, let alone married. You will learn a lot and experience a lot in the next few coming years, which may change your thoughts on what you thought you wanted in a  future spouse. What I wanted in a future husband at 18 changed after I went to college. I had some realizations about what was truly important and what worked and what didn't in relationships. Before I would not have thought that having the same religion was that important, but changed my ideal on that after being in college. I had previously dated guys of other religions and while those relationships weren't bad or horrible, they were nothing like the relationship I have now with my fiance. You never want to rush into a huge commitment such as marriage, so take it slow. The relationships where people do rush into them, typically fail down the line. Enjoy the next few years of your life as you go to college(if you are) and really mature and grow as a person. College years are a lot of fun and a big eye opener for many as you learn so much about the world and yourself. Also, in regards to him wanting a baby prior to marriage, I would stay far away from that event. Please don't get pregnant before marriage, as most of the time the guy will leave and you'll end up a single mother. The statistics on it are that 20% of guys will marry the mother of their first child, if I remember that correctly and that is a very low percentage. Not something you want for yourself.  
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Avatar universal
I'd wait to get engaged, married or have kids. My husband and I have known each other for 20 years. We dated for 2 and got engaged when we were 22. Married at 23 and have been married for 3 1/2. There are times when I think we should have waited until 30 for everything.
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Avatar universal
all I wanted to know was- is it too early to want to get engaged now and get married in two years and then start my family.
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Avatar universal
I thought the same thing, to be honest. I saw my sister ruin her life twice with having children before marriage
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13167 tn?1327194124
I think it's a good idea to wait a couple years,  but why does he purposely want to have a baby before marriage?  

This is the only generation in the history of time who purposely has children before getting married,  and then intends to consider marriage down the road.

I'm truly baffled.  Why is that?  Why would you actually PLAN to have a baby and then get married maybe a little later?  That's like running up a huge credit card bill and then consider maybe getting a job sometime later in the future.
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