Experiencing very first outbreak and scared

[need_light]

I am going through my first outbreak and I have to wait 1 week before I know if it is HSV 1 or 2. Could anyone provide some insight as to if there is a difference between the outbreaks depending if it's one or the other-- e.g. is it less sever if it is hsv 1?

My doctor has put me on Valtrex. I've been taking it for 2 days and I'm not sure what I am suppose to be noticing because it is still very painful. The pain killers are kind of helping but just making more drowsy if anything. Is there anything I can do to alleviate the discomfort or speed along the outbreak?

I am scared I may have infected my ex-bf but also not sure if he is the one who gave it to me. But if I did give it to hime, is it possible that I may have passed this to him given the below chain of events? When is it most contagious?

Day 1- slept with herpes suspect but used condom
Day 3- slept with ex-bf, no condom and oral
Day 4- slept with ex-bf, with condom
Day 8- outercourse, no penetration
Day 10-  slept with ex-bf, with condom
Day 12- first sign of outbreak

Any answers would really help put my mind at ease.No amount of the codeine is helping with the emotional pain.

Thanks,
Distraught


This discussion is related to New genital HSV-1 questions.

[need_light]

Thanks this was really helpful information. I just can't seem to bring myself to have this conversation especially since he is out of the country.

But you say that woman are protected pretty well when condoms are used. So it could have been him to who gave it to me. The only reason I was betting on the other guy is because he had more partners. My BF only had 2 (me being second).

If he had HSV 1 and gave it to me through oral, what are the chances he will now have it in his genitals?

[webcrawler]

I would do the following:

1. Relax
2. Ask your doctor to help you out with anxiety if you need it
3. Read the Herpes Handbook at westoverheights
4. Get something else to focus on. Buy a TV series on DVD
5. Go out with friends and do something athletic or fun
6. Get your results
7. Get back to the forum here
* Tell your boyfriend at some point. You have to figure out when. Sooner is better ethically. However, you really do not have many facts to give him yet...

[webcrawler]

On emotional support...

Doctors may or may not be a good source of support. Many see Herpes as a very common skin condition that very rarely causes complications. Once they believe that you do not have complications, they may dismiss it as a minor issue. This is actually the TRUTH of the matter. Remember 50%+ of the US has HSV1, 20%+ has HSV2. It is very possible that you have family members and friends with one or both.

Use the various resources on the internet..

- The Original Herpes Homepage which has a forum for young people
- The MedHelp Herpes Community (which focuses more on diagnosis)
- Westover Heights has the Herpes Handbook
- American Social Health Association www.ashastd.org which has a hotline and local support groups

Try to relax. There are millions of people around you with Herpes. The "worry" is much worse in most cases that the skin condition that it causes.

[webcrawler]

1. You are not the worst person in the world. This stuff happens literally everyday. Most of the time Herpes is passed on by people that do not know that they have it.

2. Your boyfriend may be the source.

3. Not much is known about the % of transmission right before an outbreak. However,
    - The viral load is high
    - Condoms tend to protect women better than they do men
    - I wouldn't bet either way that transmission was or was not possible

4. It is really hard to say who gave it to you, but in my opinion:

- On your first partner...
      a. Genital to Genital transmission is possible but uncommon when no outbreak occurs. Women are protected pretty well by condoms if they are used properly.
- The exposure of greatest interest here is your first encounter with your boyfriend
       b. Oral-to-Genital HSV1 transmission is possible
       c. Genital-to-Genital HSV2 transmission is possible
       d. Oral-to-Genital HSV2 transmission is possible but very rare
       e. Genital-to-Genital HSV1 transmission is possible but uncommon

In order of decreasing likelihood, I would rank: (b), (c), (a), (e), (d). This is not an exact ranking. It is just a guess... (a) and (c) are kind of a toss-up.

[need_light]

so if i was approaching an outbreak, could you provide what % possibility is that I passed it onto him? keeping in mind, he did have a condom on when it was near my outbreak. i feel like the worst person in the world.

also, could he have given it to me through oral sex? he's only been with me and 1 other person. i'm finding it hard to continue with my life. is there emotional support i could get somewhere?

[webcrawler]

A bit more direct info...

a. You will not know if he caught it until he shows lesions, tests positive on a test, or negative on a type specific test after 3-4 months.

b. You are most contagious near and during outbreaks

c. You are contagious at other times. However, Genital Type 1 typically is easier to manage: more people have it (over 50% in the US), fewer outbreaks, infrequent shedding in between outbreaks.

Once you know the type, the forum can help you with how to manage it.