There is zero risk for HIV, chlamydia, gonorrhea and NGU - you need to have penetration for those.
You could get syphilis, herpes, and HPV from the rubbing. To get syphilis, your partner would have to have a sore. To get the others, your partner wouldn't have to have symptoms.
Syphilis isn't all that common, but is still possible. You can test for it at 6 weeks, and you wouldn't get symptoms for about 3 weeks at a minimum.
Herpes type 2, or hsv2, is pretty common, and you might get symptoms any time between 2 days and 2 days, with an average of 4 days. You can test for that at 12 weeks, though most test positive by 6 weeks. Ask for a type specific IgG blood test.
There is no test for HPV for men, and you might not get any symptoms. If you do, they could take a few weeks to several months to appear. There are several different strains, and many don't give symptoms.
I can't make the decision about abstaining with your wife for you, but there's enough of a risk that you might want to at least wait until the symptom periods have passed.