Have I put myself at risk?

[Rainydayzz]

A couple a days ago I had an unprotected blowjob with an escort. I didn't do anything else. Have I put myself at risk for HIV or other deadly deceases? Or other deceases? I was also wondering is this forum is a real medical kind of forum? I'm really concerned about my own safety and that of potentiel partners I could encounter know. It was the first time I ever did such a thing and It will be my last time to. But I'm still very concerned.

Thanks for the help.

[auntiejessi]

I can't transfer the whole thread to the HIV forum, and wouldn't anyway.

Just remember that you can't have HIV from oral sex.  Its not a risk.  Go over and read the HIV forum, and you'll see the same thing there.

Anxiety is a powerful thing, and if you can't let go of it, you need to seek some help.

AJ

[kranky]

I have been having the same issues as you and i even used a condom, But my penis is red and itchy and feels constantly uncomfortable and my gland in my throat is swollen. I went for al tests 3 days ago and I am panicking now. My results are due 2moro. I am so afraid. I think our minds are too powerful. I must relax. u 2.

[Rainydayzz]

Ok Aj, I'm not going to transfer the threath to the HIV prevention board yet. (or if somebody could just place it in the HIV prevention forum that would be great to) I just want to say that my doctor said the red rash on my tighs was just from sweating and his is worse... He also said I have perfectly normal armpits and he didn't see or feel swollen lymph nodes. Offcourse he still and also thinks I wont have HIV, but he thinks I won't be sure untill I have done the test. I will try not to post here anymore. (I know I have said this before.) But when I have taken the test in two months, I'll update everybody. I hope I'm allright so I can start helping other people from that point on in stead of myself. Thank you very much for your patience and advice Aj.

[auntiejessi]

Oh and remember, oral sex is NOT going to transmit HIV.

I think after you go to the doctor you need to start posting in the HIV forum.  Its my fault, but its gone on too long here, and we don't even cover HIV here.  When this started, we were talking about other stds as well, but now that its all HIV, you should be posting in the HIV prevention forum if you have follow up questions.

Aj

[auntiejessi]

I'm not reacting against you - I am concerned for you.  

And I think that site might be among the scariest I've ever seen.  Not only is there NO medical affiliation listed, there are typos, and half-truths.

If you click on "Our Partners" at the bottom, they have things about tattoos, college courses, song lyrics, etc.  Not one medical affiliation at all.  Also, they have a link at the bottom to learn how to give a massage.

A reputable medical information site will not have song lyrics associated with it, and will clearly cite sources, will cite who developed the site, etc.

Perhaps you have a mild fungal infection under your arms.  Your doctor should be able to tell you.

Aj

[Rainydayzz]

There's one more thing that's bothering me though and that's the feeling I have in my armpits. It's like it's burning a little and some areas are red but very lightly. In case you are wondering where I get information about HIV symptoms it's from sites like these: http://www.hivsymptomsonline.com/

[Rainydayzz]

Ok, AJ you're not the only or first person that's reacting so strongly against me. I know you're doing it to help me. I will try to let it rest but it's hard everytime I feel something on my body I link it to HIV wich is probably totally wrong of me. I do hope you don't mind that I keep everybody updated in this threath, in the long run I hope I won't have HIV offcourse but his thread will provide a very clear answer for people who have done the same thing like me. I know it's totally wrong of myself to think the worst but maybe until I have a 100% sure proof I'll keep doubting wich is probably a very human reaction. I also have to say that i'm going to my doctor thursday morning and he'll examine and explain everything to me again. I really think he'll give me a lot of information and a pretty clear answor on those "symptoms" I'm feeling. After that I'll try to let the time pas by. Nevertheless I still have to thank you very much for the advice you give me.

[auntiejessi]

Dr. HHH has told you, I've told you, your own doctor has told you - you aren't at risk for HIV.  

I don't know where you are reading that these are HIV symptoms - they aren't.

If you must test - and I see no reason for you to - you can test now.  At 6 weeks, an HIV test is between 90 and 95% accurate.  If this is negative, you can relax.

Its time to see a counselor.  I know you are resistant to it, but your reaction suggests strong anxiety to me, which is something that Dr. H also mentioned.

Aj

[Rainydayzz]

Ok,  I don't really now what I'm going threw now, but I'm very scared the last couple of days. I've been to the doctors forum and asked the same question like I did here.
You can watch it here: http://www.medhelp.org/posts/show/699949. I have done a lot of research about HIV and I'm still in doubt, I'm very worried about the safety of my girlfriend and ofcourse myself. The last couple of weeks this is what I'm going through.

Week 1: Made a big mistake and felt tired that week.
Week 2: I was very scared, and felt a little flu like.
Totaly in panick I went to my normal doctor and a specialist and told them my story. They said I shouldn't fear but should do a test. My normal doctor said in three months and the specialist said I should let them take blood right away and then again in three months. Wich I did, Stil felt a little flu like, and had some musclepain.
Week 3: The bloodtest came back negative, but I developed some kind of rash. I went to the doctor who said it was a fungal infection. I got something against it and started to use it. (I was a little bit more comforted.)
Week 4: I still used the product and my rash got less, but it's still not gone.
Week 5: I'd started totally to panic. I have red dots on my thighs wich I think I have had in the past before week 1 and is just a form of acne, But I'm not so sure. I'm also feeling a little bit irritated under my armpits but that could be due to my clothes or me sweating. The problam is, I read on the internet about HIV and I think these are symptoms of HIV infection. Now everything I wrote in those two stories you can find here are exactly the thruth. Now Am I making myself sick? By poundering to much? Or is it good, I'm so watchfull? Could I have HIV? According to AJ and some others like my own doctors not from the activity I did. (I really want to believe you guys.) If I have read the doctors comment on the forum right: He thinks I shouldn't even test for HIV and can have regular sex with my girlfriend, therefore he probably doesn't think I'm in danger of getting HIV, am I right with that part? Fact is today and yesterday I was/am panicking a lot more because of the red dots and iritation under my armpits. I must say the red dots apear on my right and left thigh and like I mentioned before it's probably a form of acne. I had red dots on my thigh in the past wich was acne. As far as my armpits go, I don't see anything visible on them, nothing red or big like that. It's just feels irritated. In case you are wondering I do wash myself everyday offcourse but since I know I have to wait three months, I'm checking my whole body a couple times a day. Today I was so scared I wanted to visit my doctor but I couldn't reach him. These three months are really very hard to go threw. Hopefully other persons will read this story and don't do something as stupid as I did. It's totally not worth it. Can somebody please give me some more advice?  

[auntiejessi]

Just keep remembering that you are at NO RISK for HIV.

AJ

[Rainydayzz]

I think and also hope you are totally right AJ, I do have a flu or cold coming up now. I guess the only thing I can or should do is keep away from sites with information, live my life and work as good as possible and do that second test to put my mind in peace.
Thank you for all the help AJ, I do hope it's going to be february soon.

[auntiejessi]

That link I gave you explains why there is no risk for HIV from oral sex.

I don't see anything to worry about here at all, and I'm glad you are starting to see that.  You were never at risk for anything that would last a lifetime.

I think what you are feeling mostly is guilt and anxiety, and that's what is causing this fear.

Aj

[Rainydayzz]

AJ thanks for all you're help I really apreciate this. I know this isn't a therapy board but for me it's some form of reassurance. If I am correct I shoudn't fear HIV at all, it's even not a possibelity in my case? And the second test I will do know is just to put my mind at ease and to see If there aren't any other STD's. (But except for the Rash (wich is almost cured now) I haven't had any other symptoms or unexpleinable things. As long as I don't do this again and return to my happy normal life I should be fine? I do have a girlfriend she's my one and only person I had real intercourse with ever and I did the above thing only once. I just don't want it to ruin my life. I made a terrible mistake and I will make up to it but nevertheless there's was or is still some concern about that rest of my life part in sickness or healt? Is this a realistic and clear analyse of the situation I'm in? Or is that to optimistic by me?

[auntiejessi]

I can assure you that our responses are science-based, and to the best of our abilities, the answers are correct.

I'm glad you are finding help here, but remember that nothing substitutes for therapy if you need it.

Aj

[Rainydayzz]

Yes I have, but I find this messageboard very good. With a lot of good advice and honoust and correct information on it. At least that's what I hope. It's the most convincing one on the internet I think.

[auntiejessi]

They say that because they are misinformed.  Here is an article for you - http://www.aidsmap.com/en/news/2AF5DF5C-ECEF-4854-80BA-09F86B483A02.asp

Science says there is no risk.

Since you are having such a hard time with this, have you considered talking to someone about it?

Aj

[Rainydayzz]

I must say this waiting "game" is very hard. The rash was just a fungal infection and I have had something to cure it. I used it almost a week now and it's starting to totally disapear. I must say i often have some flu like symptoms lately but just very minor. I don't throw up or anything like that, I also don't have sweats or a sore throat.  It's probably just the brain tricking me or because it's pretty cold by now where I live and the season of flu's. Nevertheless this waiting game makes me very anxious at times. Especially when I see a little spot or don't feel so well. Not that that happens that much. All the people I contacted here on the board said I shouldn't be worried about HIV at all. I didn't have a cut, I didn't see blood with that person I did this mistake on me. I do remember I briefly rubbed her and had a minor amount of vaginal fluid on my finger but I immediatly washed it off, I also didn't really dare to touch her there because I was scared in the first place and immediatly washed my hands afterwards and took a shower a couple hours later. It's probably total anxiety but can somebody please explain why on the internet they al say you can have HIV from the above activity if the person has a small wound in her mouth like bleeding gum, or a little wound. Is this wrong or right? My doctor said the saim thing like you guys. You should have a pretty big wound on you're penis and her mouth should have been full with blood. So can I really really rule out the HIV question that's still troubling my mind? I might have posted this in the wrong board (STD) and therefore my appolegy. I really need to put my mind at rest. I'm getting very tired of poundering over it again and again. Something that's also not pretty clear to me. Am I going to be 100% sure that I don't have HIV after three months? When I take that second test? Or are all these worries I'm having totally unescesary? I t's just incredebly hard to find relieble information on this subject, it's like nobody knows 100% sure. Offcourse I do think you guys all know what's the real answer is and this forum is bringing a lot of relief to me. It really helps me. I know I have made one big mistake in my life but I really hope this one big mistake isn't going to ruin the rest of my life. I hope that somebody will please reply on this message once more some comfort and reassurance or a very clear comment would be very appreciated. To all the people that have allready replied, thank you very much for your opinion, I do believe what you said but there's doubt in my mind. Wich is probably due to the anxiety proces I'm going through now.  

[Rainydayzz]

Thank you AJ, I got the result from my test and everything is negative, I also had a conversation with the doctor about that red rash. He sais I shouldn't be worried it probably has nothing to do with an STD. They still want me to take a test again in three or 4 months. Offcourse this get's me worried every single day untill I can do that test for some closure. So a the end of january early februari I'll take the test. I just hope nothing will come out of it. I'll keep you updated. Thanks for all the help and information. This board brought some relief and help to me.

[auntiejessi]

Sounds like a fungal infection to me, like jock itch.

I still don't see any reason to worry.

Aj

[Rainydayzz]

I have to say it's a red rash on my groin. I mistranslated it. Just a small reddish rash that is parrallel with my groin. It gives me a burning sensation when I rub it. It is worse on my left groin than on my right groin. I just did the above thing once in my whole life and I only have one steady partner in my life with whom I had intercourse with. She was my first and only until I did the above mistake. How worried should I be now?

[Rainydayzz]

Nom I'm even panicking more. Since a day or three I developed a red rash on my thighs. I still haven't seen the doctor about my bloodtest. But this is getting awfully scary by now. Wath could this red rash be? I feel so ashamed.

[auntiejessi]

Oh don't waste money on a test you don't need.  There is no risk for HIV from this.

AJ

[Rainydayzz]

Thank you very much for you're quick responses. I will have the test anyway in three months. I just feel I have to do it (it's my fault and I somehow have to pay for it) and It will put my mind at rest.

[auntiejessi]

I agree, and you don't need to apologize for the spelling.  If anyone should apologize, its Tommy.

AJ