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Avatar universal

Did I put myself at risk


Last week, March 19 I went to a strip club in Northern New Jersey.  Before I left I went in the back with one of the dancers and had protected vaginal penetration with this dancer.  I sat on the couch as she went into her purse I assume and took out a condom and put it on me.  She sat on me with her back facing me.  The sex lasted no more than 5 minutes.  I ejaculated in the condom within the first minute and I continuted to allow her to sit on me for the remainder of the time, approximately 3-4 minutes.  I do remeber about a minute after I ejaculated I place my finger on my penis to confirm the condom was still on me, which it was.  When she got off of me, I was about to take the condom off, but she told me to wait that she would take it off.  I am pretty positive the condom was still intact.  I cant remember what it looked like when it was on my penis (pretty sure it was not broken) after she got off, but I do remember watching her hold it as she walked to the garbage and it did not appear to be broken or have any leaks.  The sex was rather gentle as she was really just slowly moving back and forth.

8 Days after exposure I have not experienced any discharge or pain in my urethra.  I have been checking myself quite often since the exposure and I think I may have irritated myself.  The right part of my scrotum felt a little inflammed, but was not the actual testicle.  I am not sure if this is something I caused or not.

I went to the doctor last Tuesday, The 3rd day after exposure.  He said no worries, I didn't even need to test.  However, I did not tell him the girl was a dancer and that I ejaculated in the condom and continued for a few more minutes.  I only told him it was with a complete stranger.What are your thoughts?  Did I risk my health and is catching an STD from this single experience a real concern.  I know this isn't the HIV forum, but should that even be a thought in my mind?

6 Responses
300980 tn?1194933000
Welcome to the forum.  The exposure you describe did not put you at risk for STDs, including HIV. Condom protected sex is safe sex and an intact condom indicates that  your exposure was safe.  

In general, most commercial sex workers do not have STDs or HIV. those who regularly use condoms are doing so to protect themselves, not their partners.  Further. even in the unlikely circumstance that your partner was infected. most exposures do not result in infection.  

I would have tested for STDs ha I seen you but I would have done so for completeness sake, not because of concern for STDs.

Finally, it sounds as though you have been examining yourself rather frequently an perhaps vigorously.  I would urge you to stop this. If you wish to have the assurance of testing, feel free to do so but please do not repeatedly self examine yourself.  If is of little good and may irritate you.

I hope these comments help.  The activities you describe did not put you at risk for STDs, including HIV.  EWH
Avatar universal
Thank you very much for your reply.  You have decreased my anxiety.

I do have one last concern and I will be finished asking questions.  My concern is that I continued sex with the dancer for a few minutes after I ejaculated into the condom rather quickly.  Was this a big mistake?  I understand you should change condoms after ejaculation if continuing sex, but what is the reasoning.  Does the condom become weak and fragile and is there a greater chance the condom could break or is it because the condom could slip off easier (Which it never did in my case, but I fear this could have caused a break on the top)?  

I am concerened I may of allowed a breakage in the condom by continuing sex after I ejaculated.  I have never seen a broken condom before so I do not know what to look for.  I am assuming there would have been a rather big mess to clean up if it did break - is that a fair statement?

I am sorry for the second concern but I would love to clear this concern up with you so I could move past it.  

I am assuming I would have known right away and very clearly if the condom had a break in it, especially since I did ejaculate in it?  Could this be a possibility or am I letting my anxiety and fear get the best of me?

Thank you so much
300980 tn?1194933000
Your condom did not slip off so that is not an issue.  As long as the codnom is in place, covering the head of the penis, you are protected.  

When condoms fail they do not "leak", they break wide open leaving no doubt that they have failed.  

Hope this clears things up.  EWH
Avatar universal
I really appreciate your help.  You have made me feel much better.  Thank you.
Avatar universal
Hi Doctors,

I have a quick follow up.  I went to Planned Parenthood this morning to have a Chylmydia and Gonnerhea urine test done.  They advised if positive they would call withing 10 days.  I have had not symptoms so not concerned about that really.  I have had no sores or lesions in the last 27 days since my exposure - If I were to be infected with herpes would I have had a sore by now?

Over the last few weeks I have become quite afraid of HIV from my exposure.  I know this is the wrong board so if needed I will post a new thread there, but I wanted to keep everything together.

I broke down on a day of guilt, anxiety, and depression and I ordered a HIV PCR DNA from an online testing service.  (I know very expensive and high risk of false positive).  I took the test exactly 21 days post exposure.  These tests were performed by LabCorp.

HIV-1 Antibody, Confirmation Western Blot        <1.00    <1.00      Negative
HIV 1/O/2 Abs, Qual HIV 1/O/2 Abs, Qual         Nonreactive
HIV-1 DNA by PCR With HIV Antibodies by ICMA         Negative

I was told by the testing center after 3 weeks these results are 90% reliable.  How confident can I be in these results.

I have grown very worried - My girlfriend has a bad cold for 2 days now - sorethroat, headache, slight fever, and running nose - now all congested.

This adds to my anxiety that I may have caught HIV and gave it to her.

Please help and advise, thank you so much
300980 tn?1194933000
This thread needs to end. It appears that my efforts to relieve your anxieties only feed them.  This will be my final respnse.

The money you spent for HIV testing proved what I told you .  You did not get HIV from what I told you was a no risk exposure.  You certainly do not need further testing. I urge you to believe you test results.  

Sorry your GF has a cold. It is not HIV that you gave to her.  EWH
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