I have started to date a new woman who has informed me that she has oral herpes - she has had it since she was a kid, is in her early thirties now and gets outbreaks infrequently, in fact, she said usually only if she mistakenly gets hit in the the lip hard while playing sports.
I am in my thirties, was tested by my doctor and I do not have oral herpes (or any herpes) - came up negative in my recent blood test.
So, here is the question - I have read much of the information on the site, but realistically, if I do not kiss her when she's having an outbreak, do I have a real concern about getting it if we only kiss when it's not visibly present?
My main concern is with asymptomatic shedding I guess as the information on it seems confusing.
1) Have studies been done showing what the real world risks of getting oral herpes through asymptomatic shedding from adult to adult is through kissing?
2) Since I'm in my 30's and I have not yet gotten it, could I be immune?
3) This woman seems great and I could see us starting a long term relationship - if we do and we keep kissing, are the chances that eventually I will get an HSV1 infection from her?
4) In terms of transmission to the genitals, should a condom be worn at all times, even when no lesions are present?
Basically, what are my real world risks of getting it from her?
Trying to decide how to move forward safely, or if I should "just be friends" with her, despite her being really cool.
Thank you.