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NGU? trich? other urethritis? received oral
I need emergency advice to try to save my marriage.
Happily married, worst mistake of my life...
First week of January 2011, after being out of the singles scene for 20 years, I let a situation get out of hand ended up performing a minute or two of oral on a woman, some kissing, and then she performed about a minute or less of oral on me. I didn't even ejaculate before putting a stop to it.
A week later, urethral discomfort, no discharge. Went to an expensive discreet private clinic. The battery of standard tests came back negative. I do not recall if he detected any white blood cells from his same-day in-house lab. He said my discomfort was probably due to ordinary bacteria from the woman's mouth, (something I've read on here many times). He treated me with 2g of azithromycin on the spot, and a week of cipro. There seemed to be some relief, but it was never that bad, so it was hard to tell. I DID NOT HAVE SEX WITH MY WIFE UNTIL A FEW DAYS AFTER THE CIPRO WAS DONE. The intermittent mild discomfort, (so mild, I don't always feel it), and redness persists to this day, 7 months. Never was any discharge or underwear stains. Never any pain urinating. Month later found 2g azithro + cipro in the house, no effect at all.
TWO DAYS AGO WIFE THINKS SHE HAS YEAST INF. TODAY SHE REPORTS PAINFUL URINATION + INCOMPLETE VOIDING
Reasons I fear it's trich
-performed oral sex on the woman, then kissing, then her performing oral on me, and I wonder if it could have been transported to my penis that way?
-My discomfort/urethritis is mild, and has been completely unresponsive to cipro and azithromycin, as you might expect trich to be
Reason I think it might NOT be
-In one of my old posts Dr. HHH said it could not be transmitted that way
I am convinced I gave this to her. If it is not gon or chlam, do I have a leg to stand on in terms of plausible deniability? Trying to save 3 happy lives here.
HELP?
Happily married, worst mistake of my life...
First week of January 2011, after being out of the singles scene for 20 years, I let a situation get out of hand ended up performing a minute or two of oral on a woman, some kissing, and then she performed about a minute or less of oral on me. I didn't even ejaculate before putting a stop to it.
A week later, urethral discomfort, no discharge. Went to an expensive discreet private clinic. The battery of standard tests came back negative. I do not recall if he detected any white blood cells from his same-day in-house lab. He said my discomfort was probably due to ordinary bacteria from the woman's mouth, (something I've read on here many times). He treated me with 2g of azithromycin on the spot, and a week of cipro. There seemed to be some relief, but it was never that bad, so it was hard to tell. I DID NOT HAVE SEX WITH MY WIFE UNTIL A FEW DAYS AFTER THE CIPRO WAS DONE. The intermittent mild discomfort, (so mild, I don't always feel it), and redness persists to this day, 7 months. Never was any discharge or underwear stains. Never any pain urinating. Month later found 2g azithro + cipro in the house, no effect at all.
TWO DAYS AGO WIFE THINKS SHE HAS YEAST INF. TODAY SHE REPORTS PAINFUL URINATION + INCOMPLETE VOIDING
Reasons I fear it's trich
-performed oral sex on the woman, then kissing, then her performing oral on me, and I wonder if it could have been transported to my penis that way?
-My discomfort/urethritis is mild, and has been completely unresponsive to cipro and azithromycin, as you might expect trich to be
Reason I think it might NOT be
-In one of my old posts Dr. HHH said it could not be transmitted that way
I am convinced I gave this to her. If it is not gon or chlam, do I have a leg to stand on in terms of plausible deniability? Trying to save 3 happy lives here.
HELP?
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
UTIs are common in women; almost all women suffer one or more of them at one time or another. They are not sexually acquired, although sex can trigger them. This happens because certain bacteria can normally colonize the vagina, and they are then "massaged" into the urethra during sex. However, sex is not required; UTIs also are common in virgins and sexually inactive women.
In other words, your wife's UTI has absolutely nothing to do with your sexual indiscretion or your mild urethral symptoms. Your plan to discuss your symptoms with your PCP makes sense. I am quite confident that nothing abnormal will be found, certainly no STD.
That will end this thread. No more comments of any kind, please.
In other words, your wife's UTI has absolutely nothing to do with your sexual indiscretion or your mild urethral symptoms. Your plan to discuss your symptoms with your PCP makes sense. I am quite confident that nothing abnormal will be found, certainly no STD.
That will end this thread. No more comments of any kind, please.
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
The purpose of the character limit is to require the entire question to appear in the initial window. You could have compressed into the limit without difficulty. In any case, I saw this information before responding above.
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
That test result is exactly what was espected; E. coli is the most common cause of UTI. The "mixed gram positive flora" result is meaningless, i.e. normal bacteria.
"That will end this thread. No more comments of any kind, please" meant what is said. Accept the reassurance and move on. DO NOT POST ANYTHING MORE.
"That will end this thread. No more comments of any kind, please" meant what is said. Accept the reassurance and move on. DO NOT POST ANYTHING MORE.
The lab has asked that my wife call back. They called 3 times, and left messages on the home phone, which my wife never answers, so I got them. I also found the sheet from the lab. There was indeed a large e.coli infection, (>100,00 col/ml) but there was, also, "mixed gram positive flora, 2 colony types".
Do I have to worry about that? I haven't told her she needs to call back yet.
Do I have to worry about that? I haven't told her she needs to call back yet.
Ok doc, taking your reassurance and going forward with it, I am due for a routine annual physical from my PCP.
1] Keeping in mind she, (our doctor is a woman), is also my wife's doctor, do I dare tell her of my ongoing and *variable meatitis + balanitis symptoms, or will that raise unneccessary suspicion?
As I said before, I can live with these ongoing symptoms, but my male psyche is driven to "fix" it. But I will not seek any treatment, if it will draw unneccessary suspicion.
*I say meatitis because I have no detectable discomfort in the tubular part of the urethra itself. Balanitis, because the skin of the glans gets inflammed and rashy looking with any blood flow or engorgement. I say variable, because some days, the meatus looks 90% normal. And the pain varies between 0 and 1 on a scale of 10. For review, no detectable discharge/underwear stains, and I sleep in my underwear and inspect every morning.
Regards
1] Keeping in mind she, (our doctor is a woman), is also my wife's doctor, do I dare tell her of my ongoing and *variable meatitis + balanitis symptoms, or will that raise unneccessary suspicion?
As I said before, I can live with these ongoing symptoms, but my male psyche is driven to "fix" it. But I will not seek any treatment, if it will draw unneccessary suspicion.
*I say meatitis because I have no detectable discomfort in the tubular part of the urethra itself. Balanitis, because the skin of the glans gets inflammed and rashy looking with any blood flow or engorgement. I say variable, because some days, the meatus looks 90% normal. And the pain varies between 0 and 1 on a scale of 10. For review, no detectable discharge/underwear stains, and I sleep in my underwear and inspect every morning.
Regards
second update today:
Wife told me a few minutes ago that the urgent care doctor told her the bacteria was e-coli. probably from the diarrhea we both had in mid-july from a trip to mexico. that would explain the positive response to cipro.
hopefully her other PID symptoms were either just coincidences or harmless reactions to the oral bacteria that is casing my chronic meatitis.
Wife told me a few minutes ago that the urgent care doctor told her the bacteria was e-coli. probably from the diarrhea we both had in mid-july from a trip to mexico. that would explain the positive response to cipro.
hopefully her other PID symptoms were either just coincidences or harmless reactions to the oral bacteria that is casing my chronic meatitis.
Re the lab tests on my wife who was suffering very bad pain while urinating: they had her pee in cup, and returned 10 or 15 minutes later saying she had a "very bad" UTI, and gave her 5 days of cipro x2/day. She reports major improvement in pain. Since she is responding to it, it's yet another reassurance that it's not trich.
I read up on PID last night, not sure why. It's kind of freaky. In the last 6 months wife has complained of:
-lower back pain
-at least one MASSIVELY bloody period, where she bled through a tampon in a short time
-the urinary pain we already know about
-the itching and discharge that she thought was a yeast infection
-a few months back, a sensation of fetal movement in the abdominal area
-some cramping
The final thing I'm worried about is recurrences. If the cipro works no better on her than it did on me, she will be back for more treatment. I wonder how long it will be before they start to suspect me? And then when they do, how would I explain my red meatus that looks like urethritis? I'm fairly confident I/we would test negative for chlamidya and gonorrhea. So our infection would be non-specific.
SO, KEY question:
Could we have a non-specific co-infection, (wife and me) that was not brought in by my brief receipt of oral sex. Remember, I had cipro and 2g Azithromycin 7 months ago after my exposure, and before having sex with my wife.
I read up on PID last night, not sure why. It's kind of freaky. In the last 6 months wife has complained of:
-lower back pain
-at least one MASSIVELY bloody period, where she bled through a tampon in a short time
-the urinary pain we already know about
-the itching and discharge that she thought was a yeast infection
-a few months back, a sensation of fetal movement in the abdominal area
-some cramping
The final thing I'm worried about is recurrences. If the cipro works no better on her than it did on me, she will be back for more treatment. I wonder how long it will be before they start to suspect me? And then when they do, how would I explain my red meatus that looks like urethritis? I'm fairly confident I/we would test negative for chlamidya and gonorrhea. So our infection would be non-specific.
SO, KEY question:
Could we have a non-specific co-infection, (wife and me) that was not brought in by my brief receipt of oral sex. Remember, I had cipro and 2g Azithromycin 7 months ago after my exposure, and before having sex with my wife.
Anyway you can ask her what they found, specifically? It would be great to know if it was e-coli or some other run of the mill UTI bacteria.
Wife's painful urination got intolerable. She went to urgent care today. They diagnosed her with a "bad" UTI. I'm out of town, but I asked her if they were sending a specimen out to a lab before giving her antibiotics. She said they tested on the spot in a lab on the premises, and gave her cipro. I assume that since there was a lab, and they diagnosed UTI, and prescribed cipro, that they identified a known-common UTI bug.
My ongoing variably sensitive, and variably red meatus situation is completely unaffected by cipro. If cipro works for her, I'm going to assume whatever she has, didn't come from me.
Again, no response solicited unless unless you feel it's neccessary.
With regards...
My ongoing variably sensitive, and variably red meatus situation is completely unaffected by cipro. If cipro works for her, I'm going to assume whatever she has, didn't come from me.
Again, no response solicited unless unless you feel it's neccessary.
With regards...
Ok doc. Loud and clear. No conditionals or further questions. And no response requested after your very thorough reassurance above. The reason I posted at all this time is twofold:
First, my previous three threads expressed concern with three different possible STD's and having to process three different threads, I was never clear about which ones I needed to worry about. This new thread consolidated all my worries into one.
Second, my wife is reporting vaginal itching, symptoms of yeast infection, painful urination, and sensation of bladder not emptying. I realize these may be symptoms of non-STD's as well. But in light of my ongoing symptoms, I hope you can understand at least why I was concerned.
As for my ongoing meatus irritation? It's mild enough that I could live with it forever. Happily. As long as I know it's not harming my wife or the cause of the dissolution of my family.
Kindest regards, deepest thanks for this final reassurance. Again, no response solicited.
wurried1
First, my previous three threads expressed concern with three different possible STD's and having to process three different threads, I was never clear about which ones I needed to worry about. This new thread consolidated all my worries into one.
Second, my wife is reporting vaginal itching, symptoms of yeast infection, painful urination, and sensation of bladder not emptying. I realize these may be symptoms of non-STD's as well. But in light of my ongoing symptoms, I hope you can understand at least why I was concerned.
As for my ongoing meatus irritation? It's mild enough that I could live with it forever. Happily. As long as I know it's not harming my wife or the cause of the dissolution of my family.
Kindest regards, deepest thanks for this final reassurance. Again, no response solicited.
wurried1
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
This is a repeat of your question from last March. I'm sorry to hear your concerns have persisted. However, as we discussed last time, you provide no clear evidence that you caught any STD or any other infection from the oral sex exposure last January, nor any evidence your wife has an STD, nor any reason to suspect her symptoms have anything to do with yours or with your very low risk sexual encounter. You correctly state my comments about transmission of trichomonas, which is not a realistic concern here. The odds of catching trich by the exposure described are zero.
As for "plausible deniability" and a "marriage saving stragegy", I see no problem at all. Assuming this is your only extramarital dalliance, and that she hasn't had other partners, you can be confident your wife will not turn up with any STD. Should your wife in fact turn up with trichomonas someday, or any other STD, you can be 100% honest in saying you have had no extramarital exposures that could possibly epxlain it. Period, full stop. You need not ever mention that event to her. And since women can carry trich for years without symptoms, it would logical to assume she had been infected before your marriage, no matter how long ago that was.
So my advice is for both you and your wife to believe and follow the advice of your respected PCP, and try to stop worrying about the sexual event that you obviously regret. Whatever emotional impact it is having, you can be sure there is no STD or other infection that resulted.
Unlike your previous thread, there won't be a strong of "yes but" or "did you really mean" sorts of questions. There is no information you can add that could possibly change my opinion or advice. The
Regards-- HHH, MD
As for "plausible deniability" and a "marriage saving stragegy", I see no problem at all. Assuming this is your only extramarital dalliance, and that she hasn't had other partners, you can be confident your wife will not turn up with any STD. Should your wife in fact turn up with trichomonas someday, or any other STD, you can be 100% honest in saying you have had no extramarital exposures that could possibly epxlain it. Period, full stop. You need not ever mention that event to her. And since women can carry trich for years without symptoms, it would logical to assume she had been infected before your marriage, no matter how long ago that was.
So my advice is for both you and your wife to believe and follow the advice of your respected PCP, and try to stop worrying about the sexual event that you obviously regret. Whatever emotional impact it is having, you can be sure there is no STD or other infection that resulted.
Unlike your previous thread, there won't be a strong of "yes but" or "did you really mean" sorts of questions. There is no information you can add that could possibly change my opinion or advice. The
Regards-- HHH, MD
Wife is going to seek treatment from our PCP, (we have completely bonded, accountable lives, and share the same PCP doctor). So I am looking for a marriage-saving strategy on how to handle this.
For clarification, Dr. HHH opined that _trich_ could not be transported to a man by first performing oral on the infected woman, then kissing, then receiving oral from her. I was going to ask for the doctor's opinion of the odds of a man catching trich that way. 0-100%? But I ran out of allowable characters.
All the best,
wurried
For clarification, Dr. HHH opined that _trich_ could not be transported to a man by first performing oral on the infected woman, then kissing, then receiving oral from her. I was going to ask for the doctor's opinion of the odds of a man catching trich that way. 0-100%? But I ran out of allowable characters.
All the best,
wurried
You are reading content posted in the STDs Forum
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
