Welcome to the Forum. I’ll try to address your concerns. The symptoms you describe do not suggest oral herpes to me. While oral HSV can cause sores within the mouth, there are typically sores on the lips and outside of the mouth at the same time as well. In addition, initial HSV would typically last longer than five days. it is far more likely that what you are experiencing is some other, community acquired, self-limited, non-STD virus which could be from the women you each kissed or which could be something that one of you picked up elsewhere and gave to the other. In answer to your questions:
1. See above - no.
2. if you have HSV-1 in the mouth (this is unlikely), your chances of recurrences at this time are greater than 50/50.
3. No. If this is HSV it is oral and therefore no concern about genital sex. More likely however is that it is not HSV and therefore no risk. Finally, if you both turned out to have HSV-1 you would not give it to each other because you already have it. No matter how you slice it, there is no need for condoms.
4. See 3 above.
Regarding other sources of information, much information about herpes can be obtained by accessing excellent informational web sites such as the one run by the American Social Health Association (disclosure, Dr. Handsfield and I are both on the Board of Directors of ASHA).
Hope this helps. EWH
Thank you for your quick reply. I am just trying to make sure that there is no way we could make a bad decision worse. If this is a primary infection of Oral HSV 1 or 2, wouldn't it still be possible for us to pass it to other areas of our bodies since we wouldn't have many antibodies built up? Wouldn't this take months? I just don't want to be hasty, resume our normal sex lives, and have regrets that now we have the problem genitally as well. We do want to have kids at some point (probably soon given our ages!) Also it did go beyond kissing (oral sex) I don't want to leave that out. I was trimming the original post to fit the 2000 character limit and inadvertantly trimmed that information out.
I realize HSV is a common thing and am prepared to live with it due to our own actions, however what would be worse it to contract it genitally, in our eyes, or fingers due to us being reckless with each other (our ourselves, auto inoculation) when we could possible wait a few months.
What caused me to start suspecting HSV was this web page: http://www.herpesdiagnosis.com/labialis.html where it talks about primary oral infection.
Also, my tongue has groups of red swollen papillae surrounded by a white border that "look" like a healing HSV infection. (Again, no room on the original post).
Thank you again.
Oh - and by the way, Her symptoms were closer to 8 days total (tongue burning, red swollen taste buds, and lesions on hard pallet) and mine is just clearing up finally today which puts me at around 8 days as well. Lots of sites I have looked at have mentioned that many primary infections in adults can be intra-oral only, but maybe that is really not common for a primary in an adult? I know it's somewhat rare in and of itself for mid-thirties people to pick up a primary infection.
Still unlikely. But, if you have HSV at one site, the infection is not liable to be spread to other parts of the body once the initial infection starts to heal. EWH
Thank you doctor for your information. The several lesions on the roof of my wifes mouth certainly looked like intra-oral herpes (white sores with red borders on the hard palette) sores, but I'll be happy to know that they weren't.
We have both completely healed now - but every indication on line that I have found is that this indeed was very probably a primary HSV infection. My tongue had very swollen fungiform papillae and was very painful for 3 or 4 days, and then it was coated for a few days after (which has now resolved). My tongue looked just like some pics I have found of a HSV infection of the tongue, although it never progressed to canker sore looking lesions like I have seen on some.