Welcome to the forum. Thanks for your question.
The bottom line is that almost certainly you do not have genital herpes.
When one person in a relationship has chronic, longstanding HSV-2, the average transmission risk is probably around once for every 1,000 sexual exposures. (In monogamous couples in this situation, after 10 years only about half the partners catch HSV-2.) And that's for unprotected sex; with only several exposures and consistent condom use, your risk was near zero. Although natural membrane condoms in theory might be a little less effective than latex, the difference is small and any barrier is highly effective in STD prevention, including herpes.
Second, your symptoms are not typical for genital herpes. The symptoms themselves (bladder, urethra, etc) are wrong, and so is the duration. Herpes outbreak symptoms never last more than 1-2 weeks, not the several weeks you seem to imply.
It is obvious your urologist suspects prostatitis, which is not an STD. Based on your symptoms, that seems a good bet. However, I would be even more suspicious that you only have genitally focused anxiety and/or the chronic pelvic pain sydrome. I suggest you google that term; there is an excellent Wikipedia article, and I would also direct you to information provided by the Stanford University Dept of Urology (which probably will be near the top of the google hits). As you will see, CPPS and prostatitis overlap with one another. You might speak with your urolgist about it -- and also don't get your hopes up that the doxycycline will help very much. Such antibiotics are often tried in situations like yours, but have no benefit it no infection is present. (Perhaps the Vesicare will help a bit, however.)
Having said all that, as the former partner of a person with HSV-2, it would be reasonable to have a blood test for it. You can expect negative results, which would confirm for sure that your symptoms are not due to herpes.
I hope this has helped. Best wishes-- HHH, MD
Doctor,
Thank you for answering my somewhat delayed follow-up question.
Your explanations are succinct yet very informative.
Welcome back.
As I said above, your symptoms are typical for CPPS -- which are idential to those that can be caused by prostate problems and overactive bladder. "Reaction to bacteria in your partner's mouth" implies nongonococcal urethritis (NGU), but the main symtpom that is discharge, not urethral discomfort of the sort you describe; and you've already been treated with the best drugs for it. And you can continue to ignore your thoughts about herpes, which never does anything like this.
If your symptoms continue, it's something to take up with your urologist. But many men just learn to live with such symptoms. Once you understand (and truly believe) that it's nothing harmful either for you or any future sex partner, they may fade away. In any case, for sure you have no STD, so I can't help further. Best of luck with it.
Dear Doctor,
I am hoping I may follow-up on my question from January. I followed-up with a urologist who conducted a DRL, ordered a bladder ultrasound with voiding test and a cystoscopy. In summary, results of tests were a slightly enlarged prostate and in his opinion, an overactive bladder to be treated with Enablex. He did not seem concerned with my prostate.
Here's my problem. I am still having general urethra discomfort and persistent need to urinate but often without the ability to urinate. This has been going on ever since my initial UTI symptoms in mid-November and it's driving me crazy.
I did suspect HSV but you put that to rest. Could my symptoms be caused by the oral sex I am receiving from the same partner I wrote about in January? I read that some people have reactions to the bacteria found in your partner's mouth. Any other ideas on the diagnosis or what questions I should be asking my general doctor or urologist?
As you can tell, I am frustrated and trying to figure out what could be causing my persistent symptoms and what I can do to help alleviate them.
Thanks again.