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Do I Need to See a Sexologist?
- Male
- 105lbs, 5'7" (generic, perfectly healthy)
- 30 year old
- Complaint duration: since January 2016
- Medication: only 1.25mg of finasteride daily (since August 2017)
Up until January 2016, I had a perfectly normal libido. Strong morning wood, all good. All of a sudden, it just vanished, and I also stopped getting morning wood. NOT a gradual process, but really, from one day to another, it was gone. I won't go into details, but I will mention that the day before this happened, I had a "traumatic" experience that lasted only one day.
However, I did not dwell on it and was mentally fine a few days later. I haven't even thought about it since then. In fact, when I think about it now, I just laugh at myself for being so concerned and feeling "traumatized." Nothing too serious, but an incident combined with other personal issues probably made it one of the worst (if not the worst) day of my life. That's how it felt... at that time!
Ever since that day, libido has been very low. I went to different doctors (2016, 2017 and 2018). All blood tests (testo, estrogen, etc, everything) are fine. I can post the results. Also, no STDs.
Another thing, I might have suffered from a (very) mild depression in 2016, I might have had some anxiety. At night when I would wake up, my mind would be very active and I would be stressed out for nothing (not related to the incidence, just felt that I wasn't making any process in life, no job, can't find work, etc). 2017 and until now, I (strongly) believe that mentally, I'm almost perfectly fine!
My doctor referred me to an urologist (on a waiting list), and says I should see a sexologist. I know he thinks it's a psychological issue, but I'm not unhappy, sad, suicidal or any of these things. Is it possible that that the incident I experienced back 2016 somehow "rewired" me or did something to me that needs to be fixed? Would sexologist be able to fix it (again, I'm not depressed).
*** Sexually, this is only a very low libido issue (no desire). Barely any desire thoughout the day and night. Barely any morning wood. No ED, no ejaculation issues, etc (just requires a lot of stimulation since there's barely any desire).
I've also been on finasteride since August 2017. I know low libido is a side effect, but I will tell you, I haven't noticed any difference. Libido was temporary high only the first week when I started finasteride (normal side effect of finasteride, T levels go back to normal). Temporary high... Suggests that it's not psychological?
- 105lbs, 5'7" (generic, perfectly healthy)
- 30 year old
- Complaint duration: since January 2016
- Medication: only 1.25mg of finasteride daily (since August 2017)
Up until January 2016, I had a perfectly normal libido. Strong morning wood, all good. All of a sudden, it just vanished, and I also stopped getting morning wood. NOT a gradual process, but really, from one day to another, it was gone. I won't go into details, but I will mention that the day before this happened, I had a "traumatic" experience that lasted only one day.
However, I did not dwell on it and was mentally fine a few days later. I haven't even thought about it since then. In fact, when I think about it now, I just laugh at myself for being so concerned and feeling "traumatized." Nothing too serious, but an incident combined with other personal issues probably made it one of the worst (if not the worst) day of my life. That's how it felt... at that time!
Ever since that day, libido has been very low. I went to different doctors (2016, 2017 and 2018). All blood tests (testo, estrogen, etc, everything) are fine. I can post the results. Also, no STDs.
Another thing, I might have suffered from a (very) mild depression in 2016, I might have had some anxiety. At night when I would wake up, my mind would be very active and I would be stressed out for nothing (not related to the incidence, just felt that I wasn't making any process in life, no job, can't find work, etc). 2017 and until now, I (strongly) believe that mentally, I'm almost perfectly fine!
My doctor referred me to an urologist (on a waiting list), and says I should see a sexologist. I know he thinks it's a psychological issue, but I'm not unhappy, sad, suicidal or any of these things. Is it possible that that the incident I experienced back 2016 somehow "rewired" me or did something to me that needs to be fixed? Would sexologist be able to fix it (again, I'm not depressed).
*** Sexually, this is only a very low libido issue (no desire). Barely any desire thoughout the day and night. Barely any morning wood. No ED, no ejaculation issues, etc (just requires a lot of stimulation since there's barely any desire).
I've also been on finasteride since August 2017. I know low libido is a side effect, but I will tell you, I haven't noticed any difference. Libido was temporary high only the first week when I started finasteride (normal side effect of finasteride, T levels go back to normal). Temporary high... Suggests that it's not psychological?
It sounds psychological, and I think a mental health counselor or psychiatrist would be more beneficial than a sexologist. mental health issues aren't always plain as day, so to say you're happy doesn't mean there isn't something blocking you subliminally. I think also the added stress of trying to figure this out might not be helping either. If you haven't tried therapy, I'd suggest that be your next move. Hope this helps!
1 Comments
Thanks for the reply. To be honest, whatever issues I have in my life, I recognize them and try to solve them as best as I can. I was a bad situation back in 2016. Total lost career wise, disconnected from my friends and couldn't find a job. But I made a lot of process in 2017. I volunteered and passed a certificate exam. I'm able to laugh and have a good time. Now, I'm about to start a new job. So I've made progress, but my libido is still the same.
The situation I'm in now is much better than how it was back in 2015 when I had a perfectly normal libido.
Unless if my brain need to be rewired (or if past experiences damaged me somehow and left lasting effects) and therapy can help me with that (not sure how), then I'd say it's worth it. But if it's just to solve some minor issues or issues that I'm already working on, I just absolutely don't see how that's going to get back my libido. I could be completely wrong, but I just don't see how it's going to help.
Is it normal for someone suffering psychologically to lose his libido from one day to another? Isn't a gradual process?
The situation I'm in now is much better than how it was back in 2015 when I had a perfectly normal libido.
Unless if my brain need to be rewired (or if past experiences damaged me somehow and left lasting effects) and therapy can help me with that (not sure how), then I'd say it's worth it. But if it's just to solve some minor issues or issues that I'm already working on, I just absolutely don't see how that's going to get back my libido. I could be completely wrong, but I just don't see how it's going to help.
Is it normal for someone suffering psychologically to lose his libido from one day to another? Isn't a gradual process?
So, the term sexologist is not used around me much. Sex therapist? This is a therapist that focuses on sex? guess it would help you. But if the underlying issue is some self esteem issues or anxiety/depression that you are not really aware of, not sure a regular psychologist wouldn't help as well. But you say you aren't having those issues. Did they specifically check your thyroid? Men of your age aren't always checked for these issues. But really, if you've had a complete physical and no medical reason can be determined for the low libido, psychological is about all it could be other than a symptom of your medication. BUT, are you in a relationship where this is causing issues? Because otherwise, just go on about things and see if this resolves on its own. So, you aren't horny often. If you aren't causing a woman you are with to notice or be upset about it, then let it be to see if you can stop focusing on it. You are almost creating anxiety for yourself in trying to figure it out, if that makes sense.
1 Comments
Yes, it's probably a sex therapist and focuses entirely on sex. Here in Quebec, they call it a sexologist. Yes, thyroid (TSH) was checked back in 21016 and 2018, all values are within range and perfectly normal.
I'm not in a relationship. Psychologically, I'd say I'm in a much better position since I found a job and will start soon. Besides that, not much different than how I was before the libido suddenly dropped.
That's precisely the issue. I'm almost never horny, morning and night. Libido is completely dead. However, I don't have any erection or ejaculation issues (just requires more stimulation to maintain it, but works fine). No spontaneous erections like before. No morning wood also. It was NOT like this before the sudden drop. AT ALL.. It was sudden from one day to another, which I find very strange.
Say it's not physical, but psychological, shouldn't I at least get a morning wood the moment I wake up? Or is there something messed up in my brain? I'm also on a wait list for an urologist, what would he be able to do to help me?
It bothers me a lot and I can't understand why I feel this way. I'm starting my new job next week, so I'm hoping that the new change will somehow improve things, but I doubt it.
I'm not in a relationship. Psychologically, I'd say I'm in a much better position since I found a job and will start soon. Besides that, not much different than how I was before the libido suddenly dropped.
That's precisely the issue. I'm almost never horny, morning and night. Libido is completely dead. However, I don't have any erection or ejaculation issues (just requires more stimulation to maintain it, but works fine). No spontaneous erections like before. No morning wood also. It was NOT like this before the sudden drop. AT ALL.. It was sudden from one day to another, which I find very strange.
Say it's not physical, but psychological, shouldn't I at least get a morning wood the moment I wake up? Or is there something messed up in my brain? I'm also on a wait list for an urologist, what would he be able to do to help me?
It bothers me a lot and I can't understand why I feel this way. I'm starting my new job next week, so I'm hoping that the new change will somehow improve things, but I doubt it.
A sexologist referral! You don't hear of that every day! So, often a drop in libido is hormonal for a man. If your testosterone is lower right now for some reason. That can be caused by various things. It's a natural part of aging but you are a young man. But things that can impact testosterone level are injury or trauma to the testicles, infection, being over weight, especially if you have belly fat,. Other things to test for are your thyroid function especially since you had low grade depression at one point. If you have a slow thyroid, testosterone can be impacted. Get a check for diabetes as well as that can be an underlying cause. In fact, a medical doctor should run blood work on you and check all of these things. They could be balanced out if it is a testosterone issue with replacement therapy. Other things are lack of sleep and too much or too little exercise.
There are a whole host of psychological reasons for onset of low libido that you know about and sometimes they are going on more than we want including low self esteem. Also, how is your alcohol intake? That can drive libido low if it is too much.
Anyway, you realize you've taken a medication that lowers libido and maybe going off will help. Lots of drugs do interfere with libido. Let us know what the doctor says. good luck
There are a whole host of psychological reasons for onset of low libido that you know about and sometimes they are going on more than we want including low self esteem. Also, how is your alcohol intake? That can drive libido low if it is too much.
Anyway, you realize you've taken a medication that lowers libido and maybe going off will help. Lots of drugs do interfere with libido. Let us know what the doctor says. good luck
1 Comments
Thanks for the reply,specialmom.
I want to mention blood tests have been done many times. Everything is perfectly fine. I don't have a belly. I'm a skinny type. Alcohol is once every 2 or 3 months with friends (social, no alcohol problem).
Finasteride could be the reason, but keep in mind, that I started having the libido issue long before starting finasteride. I personally haven't noticed any changes. Yes, I will eventually temporary stop to see if it will help.
It's either finasteride or psychological. My question to you, if I'm telling you that I'm not depressed, unhappy, and that in general, I'm someone who can laugh and be happy (even if everything in my life is not perfect, most like people), how can it still be a psychological issue? What exactly can a sexologist do to help me?
I'm just very confused about this issue, and I find that no one can help or provide a concrete answer.
I want to mention blood tests have been done many times. Everything is perfectly fine. I don't have a belly. I'm a skinny type. Alcohol is once every 2 or 3 months with friends (social, no alcohol problem).
Finasteride could be the reason, but keep in mind, that I started having the libido issue long before starting finasteride. I personally haven't noticed any changes. Yes, I will eventually temporary stop to see if it will help.
It's either finasteride or psychological. My question to you, if I'm telling you that I'm not depressed, unhappy, and that in general, I'm someone who can laugh and be happy (even if everything in my life is not perfect, most like people), how can it still be a psychological issue? What exactly can a sexologist do to help me?
I'm just very confused about this issue, and I find that no one can help or provide a concrete answer.
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