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Intercourse and Chemotherapy

I recently tried to have intercourse after nearly a year.  I had a complete abdominal hysterectomy and removal of the right ovary along with an appedectomy during a colon resection in July of 2008.  I was going through chemo (colorectal CA) last year when I had intercourse and then went through radiation in the winter.  During this time, my long-time boyfriend and I had decided to take time from each other.  I have started chemo again after a relapse.  This time with intercourse (we are working on our relationship and my illness) there was a lot of pain and bleeding.  Full penetration did not occur as the pain was too intense.  I did go to a CNP to check for vaginal tearing, which I do have.

Would chemo cause me to be more tender?  When I last saw my GYN in Feb, we joked about a vaginal dialator but I insisted I would be fine as I had a healthy sexual lifestyle prior to the treatments.  I am not able to see my GYN for a couple more weeks.  What exactly would a vaginal dialator do?  Would it help with the pain and discomfort I feel?  We used a lot of lubrication as I now experience a lot of dryness do to the surgery.  What can I do to help with the dryness?

Are there any other questions I should ask my GYN when I see him?  I am very embarrassed by this so I want to make sure I have accurate information about treatment so that all parts of my relationship can be worked on.

Thank you for your help with this delicate situation.  
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