Aa
Any idea why it hurts?
I've had pain during sex since I was 22. I'm now 27. I've had a normal vaginal ultrasound and I have no STD or Infection. I've been to 2 gynecologists they dont know what the issue is. There isnt another one for many miles too far.. I had an laparoscopy done and they removed my endometriosis. Severity was minimal. I never felt any relief from the surgury. During sex it shoots up my stomach feels like an ice pick going through my cervix. I use lubrication everytime. The pain steadily gets worse. Now it feels like sandpaper on my cervix as well as the abdominal stabbing and shooting pains. I suffer abdominal pain and vaginal discomfort for hours after sex. The worse the pain the worse the aftermath. I've been on so many different birth controls none have touched my pain. I am thinking about a hysterectomy seriously as a last ditch effort to rid this pain. No I dont want kids no I won't change my mind. I hate kids. I've been in a steady relationship for several years we both do not want kids. Your opinion on whats going on with my pain would be appreciated
I'm so sorry this is happening to you.
How long ago did you have the lap done where they removed the endo?
I had severe endo and ovarian cysts for years, and sex was always painful for me, much like you describe. The birth control pill helped me some, but never really alleviated it fully, and it could hurt for hours post-orgasm, even if the orgasm was achieved without penetration.
I had a hysterectomy and for me, it was the best decision. It may be for you, as well, but it won't be as simple as you requesting it and getting it. For insurance, they may want you to try certain treatments first before they approve the hysterectomy. There are new treatments for endo since I've had my hysterectomy that they may want you to try, if you haven't already.
Your doctor may hesitate, based on your age and that you don't have kids, even if you've emphatically stated that you don't want them.
My advice is to continue to see your doctor, even if you think it's pointless. Go on record, over and over, about your pain. Let them know how it's impacting your life.
It may be frustrating - it will be - but try what they suggest. You may find relief in a new treatment. Be open to their suggestions. If they can't find a cause, ask what they suggest to do next.
A hysterectomy should be your last resort. It's not without risk, and in ways both good and bad, it's life altering. There are definitely aspects that are freeing, but it does change so much.
And again, I'm sorry. It shouldn't be this hard, but it is.
How long ago did you have the lap done where they removed the endo?
I had severe endo and ovarian cysts for years, and sex was always painful for me, much like you describe. The birth control pill helped me some, but never really alleviated it fully, and it could hurt for hours post-orgasm, even if the orgasm was achieved without penetration.
I had a hysterectomy and for me, it was the best decision. It may be for you, as well, but it won't be as simple as you requesting it and getting it. For insurance, they may want you to try certain treatments first before they approve the hysterectomy. There are new treatments for endo since I've had my hysterectomy that they may want you to try, if you haven't already.
Your doctor may hesitate, based on your age and that you don't have kids, even if you've emphatically stated that you don't want them.
My advice is to continue to see your doctor, even if you think it's pointless. Go on record, over and over, about your pain. Let them know how it's impacting your life.
It may be frustrating - it will be - but try what they suggest. You may find relief in a new treatment. Be open to their suggestions. If they can't find a cause, ask what they suggest to do next.
A hysterectomy should be your last resort. It's not without risk, and in ways both good and bad, it's life altering. There are definitely aspects that are freeing, but it does change so much.
And again, I'm sorry. It shouldn't be this hard, but it is.
6 Comments
I’m no expert on this, but I’ve heard hysterectomies can cause many changes that you may not want. My sister underwent one after years of prblms, but then immediately went into menopause, hot flashes, etc. She wasn’t too happy about it but on the other hand, it did help with the prblms she was having, so it was kind of a trade-off. My advice is to make sure you arm yourself w/ as much info (pros, cons, side effects, etc.) before you decide to go thru with it so you know exactly what you’re facing & what to expect. Do some online research yourself - often Dr’s have a tendency to minimize the side effects you may face...
Absolutely!
If you have your ovaries taken, you will go right into menopause. This is not easy. You can try hormone replacement, but that's definitely a trial and error process to get to the dose that works for you, and delivery method (patches, pills, etc.).
Sex changed for me, too - orgasms aren't as strong as they used to be, but since I'm not writhing in pain from them anymore, and actual sex doesn't hurt anymore, I consider that a decent trade off. :)
Your skin may change, your hair may change, you may gain weight. Your libido may change, though for me, because sex didn't hurt anymore, it was like a whole new world had opened up. Your mileage may vary.
Hot flashes are not fun. They can be managed though, and really, you'll either get them now, or later going through menopause.
But definitely research it. There are loads of pros and cons, and only you can decide if it's a good decision for you.
If you have your ovaries taken, you will go right into menopause. This is not easy. You can try hormone replacement, but that's definitely a trial and error process to get to the dose that works for you, and delivery method (patches, pills, etc.).
Sex changed for me, too - orgasms aren't as strong as they used to be, but since I'm not writhing in pain from them anymore, and actual sex doesn't hurt anymore, I consider that a decent trade off. :)
Your skin may change, your hair may change, you may gain weight. Your libido may change, though for me, because sex didn't hurt anymore, it was like a whole new world had opened up. Your mileage may vary.
Hot flashes are not fun. They can be managed though, and really, you'll either get them now, or later going through menopause.
But definitely research it. There are loads of pros and cons, and only you can decide if it's a good decision for you.
Thx for your input, auntiejessi - I’m sure many readers appreciate your advice...
And yours :)
I have enough trial and error with pills and tests to get a hysterectomy. The doctor already agreed to do it. I have tried treatment for it and I had the laparoscopy done 1 year ago. I know about the hysterectomy and its risks how u go right into menopause. At this point it beats broken glass during sex and stabbing icepick pain
If the doctor has agreed to do it, congrats :)
Hystersisters is a great resource for info about this. They have tons of articles, from what to expect, what to do to prepare for the hospital, anesthesia, different types of hysterectomy. They even have a site just for your partner, and what he can expect from everything.
https://www.hystersisters.com/vb2/articlelist_170.htm
https://www.misterhystersisters.com/faq.php?threadid=152196
I'm almost 20 years out from mine, and even with all the challenges, I don't have a single regret. Feel free to PM me with any questions you may have (click on my name to get to my profile and you can send me a message from there), and let us know how you are.
Hystersisters is a great resource for info about this. They have tons of articles, from what to expect, what to do to prepare for the hospital, anesthesia, different types of hysterectomy. They even have a site just for your partner, and what he can expect from everything.
https://www.hystersisters.com/vb2/articlelist_170.htm
https://www.misterhystersisters.com/faq.php?threadid=152196
I'm almost 20 years out from mine, and even with all the challenges, I don't have a single regret. Feel free to PM me with any questions you may have (click on my name to get to my profile and you can send me a message from there), and let us know how you are.
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Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
Discharge often isn't normal, and could mean an infection or an STD.
STDs aren't transmitted through clothing. Fabric is a germ barrier.
Normal vaginal discharge varies in color, smell, texture and amount.
