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Need help

Hello my name is Rebecca, and I have just had 2 kids in the past two years and now I can't feel anything during sex like at all even when I use my toy I can't feel anything and if I do by chance get off it is not nearly as much as it used to be and it's just been making me mad and then it makes him mad because I'm mad and then we just want to quit. Is there anything I can do to make it better or anything I can use to feel anything
3 Responses
139792 tn?1498585650
There can be multiple causes, requiring thorough discussions with therapist an you and your partner. You and your partner should have cordial relation to solve sexual problem.If medical causes are ruled out you can try exercises.May Google male and female deer exercises, kegel exercises, and Sat kriya. In yoga there is one branch called kundalini yoga. You may Google this phrase and learn the method. Anal peripheral prostate massage is of powerful technique to correct sexual health. This exercise can be done by female as well for sexual health purpose. You will have to keep patience as it will take time to get the results.
139792 tn?1498585650
Both of you should consult a therapist.
1029273 tn?1472231494

There could be a few things going on which are having a negative effect on your sex life.  A lot of women (who have become mom's) complain about this very subject: lack of feeling during intimacy.  You may have noticed, that once you have had children, your sex life has changed.  This is something almost every parent has experienced, especially the mommies: sex just isn't the same anymore.  The good news here is that you can turn things around by making a few changes in your routine...

Stress, lack of sleep, lack of personal time, and dull routine can really affect our mood and ability to relax.  There's also hormonal changes (estrogen levels) which fluctuate after having babies, putting a damper on our mood and sex drive. Speak with your doctor about this, if you believe that there may be a problem. Get as much sleep as possible, when you can...

Vaginal deliveries can stretch (loosen) vaginal walls that can lead to lack of certain sensitivity.  It's always a good idea to practice Kegel exercises daily, once you start having children. Kegels can make a big difference when it comes to vaginal sensitivity and keeping your vaginal muscles toned...

Once you accept the fact that your sex life has changed forever, you can move on to figuring out how to make it more fulfilling :)

I suggest that you try to reconnect with each other by trying to schedule some 'alone time', definitely without the kids.  Find someone, close trusted friend or family member, to watch your children for a couple of hours ~ maybe once a week.  This is when you can start reconnecting intimately; go out on a date, or stay in; remember to cuddle, hold hands, laugh, and kiss before you move on to foreplay/sex. One more thing, ditch the toy for awhile.  Toys can desensitize and make us more dependent on them for orgasms. Try different positions and sexual techniques to spice up your sex life.  There are manuals (books) and videos that you can research online, to give you some different ideas...

Hang in there, & Good Luck!
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139792 tn?1498585650
Indore, India
Avatar universal
st. louis, MO
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Southwest , MI
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