I used to be in the same boat as you! It seemed the more we had sex the less painful it was but if you get it in your head its gonna hurt then it is going to hurt. Have you had any children yet? I never had an orgasm till after my first child, I think the reason was I was to shy to tell my hubby what I liked and when not to stop. Try using your voice to tell your hubby what you like and what you want hm to do and see if that works for you. Let me know if it works for you.
A lot of women do not experience a orgasm through sex alone.
As regards the dryness, this too can happen if you are not quite yet ready. Another problem for dryness can be from getting old and from some medications. Do foreplay before having the act of love making so that you are both aroused and become moist. Also buy a good lubricant like KY Jelly, there are other types of lubricant that you can buy from the pharmacist, sex shop, supermarket or online and use this on both yourself and your husband.
If the dryness persists and the lubricants do not help, then do make an appointment to see your doctor to find out if the dryness is due to hormonal changes. The doctor can prescribe a hormone cream to apply to the vagina.