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Female Orgasam
I know this is going to sound odd but I don't think I have ever had an orgasm. I have asked a lot of people and done a lot of reading on the subject and I am just not sure. I get excited and it feels good during foreplay and sex, and I feel very sensitive after a while, but I just don't get this rush like you hear people talking about. It just never happens. I have tried relaxing, toys and masturbation to see if any of those things would work. I have a very capable lover that I have been with for 3 yrs. and have had several other sexual relationships in the past. I really enjoy sex, but I feel like I am faking it, though I don't really know if I am or not. I usually get too sensitive to touch and we move on. Is this rush just a myth or is there something wrong with me?
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
Hi Carmen.
As odd as it sounds, having orgasms has nothing to do with a capable lover or relaxation. Instead, your most effective tools are knowing how your body responds and being comfortable with that response. Physiologically, during orgasm, you will experience a series of contractions in your clitoris and around your entire crotch. You state that you usually get too sensitive to touch; that tells me that you're very close to orgasm and are removing the stimulation early. You need to continue on, even if it feels too intense. Here's some basic information for you.
In women, the clitoris must be stimulated—either directly or indirectly—in order for orgasm to happen. The clitoris is our primary sex organ--not the vagina--and consists of the glans (or head), the hood which covers the glans, and the shaft. For most women, orgasm results from a constant circular motion around the shaft and glans. Also important is that once a woman’s orgasm begins, if the stimulation is removed, the orgasm will end. Orgasm is characterized by a series of pleasurable, involuntary contractions in and around the vulva (clitoris, vagina and inner/outer lips). Most women have between 5 and 8 contractions per orgasm. Most women don't orgasm from penis-vagina sex alone because it's difficult for the clitoris to receive enough stimulation. So please don't put pressure on yourself that you have to orgasm that way. There are lots of ways to share pleasure and enjoy sex--and lots of ways to orgasm.
It takes time and practice to learn about your own orgasms before you share them with a partner. The best way to find out what you like is to experiment when you’re alone. Check out the area around your clitoris first. Be sure to use some lubrication and gently touch around the top and sides to find out what feels good. You may need to do this many times before you get comfortable and used to the intensity. Find the sensitive spots that feel good. The best part of this learning experience is that it’s fun!
Once you understand your own body’s responses, then you can begin to share them with a partner—even more fun! Be patient. It takes time to learn and to build up trust, but if you do this now, you’ll be setting yourself up for yummy sex for the rest of your life. I highly recommend the book, "For Yourself: The Fulfillment of Female Sexuality," by Lonnie Barbach. It's widely available in paperback, and is a step-by-step program for learning about your own sexual response. In addition, it contains lots of sharing by women about their own personal journeys of sexual self-discovery. I think it will help you immensely.
And if you find that your thoughts are intruding or getting in the way of letting yourself go over the top, employ your favorite hot fantasy to help intensify your feelings. Good luck! Dr. J
As odd as it sounds, having orgasms has nothing to do with a capable lover or relaxation. Instead, your most effective tools are knowing how your body responds and being comfortable with that response. Physiologically, during orgasm, you will experience a series of contractions in your clitoris and around your entire crotch. You state that you usually get too sensitive to touch; that tells me that you're very close to orgasm and are removing the stimulation early. You need to continue on, even if it feels too intense. Here's some basic information for you.
In women, the clitoris must be stimulated—either directly or indirectly—in order for orgasm to happen. The clitoris is our primary sex organ--not the vagina--and consists of the glans (or head), the hood which covers the glans, and the shaft. For most women, orgasm results from a constant circular motion around the shaft and glans. Also important is that once a woman’s orgasm begins, if the stimulation is removed, the orgasm will end. Orgasm is characterized by a series of pleasurable, involuntary contractions in and around the vulva (clitoris, vagina and inner/outer lips). Most women have between 5 and 8 contractions per orgasm. Most women don't orgasm from penis-vagina sex alone because it's difficult for the clitoris to receive enough stimulation. So please don't put pressure on yourself that you have to orgasm that way. There are lots of ways to share pleasure and enjoy sex--and lots of ways to orgasm.
It takes time and practice to learn about your own orgasms before you share them with a partner. The best way to find out what you like is to experiment when you’re alone. Check out the area around your clitoris first. Be sure to use some lubrication and gently touch around the top and sides to find out what feels good. You may need to do this many times before you get comfortable and used to the intensity. Find the sensitive spots that feel good. The best part of this learning experience is that it’s fun!
Once you understand your own body’s responses, then you can begin to share them with a partner—even more fun! Be patient. It takes time to learn and to build up trust, but if you do this now, you’ll be setting yourself up for yummy sex for the rest of your life. I highly recommend the book, "For Yourself: The Fulfillment of Female Sexuality," by Lonnie Barbach. It's widely available in paperback, and is a step-by-step program for learning about your own sexual response. In addition, it contains lots of sharing by women about their own personal journeys of sexual self-discovery. I think it will help you immensely.
And if you find that your thoughts are intruding or getting in the way of letting yourself go over the top, employ your favorite hot fantasy to help intensify your feelings. Good luck! Dr. J
In my opinion:
When it comes to women, all of you are different when it comes to reaching an orgasm. Some of you just get a burst of wetness during sex, or body may shake, or thighs start to quiver, or body freezes up, etc. You have to figure out which one is you. But the main key to knowing you had an orgasm is after having sex you feel SATISFIED. When men ejaculate from sex, they immediately feel satisfied. So the question is, after you finish having sex, do you feel satisfied within? Do you feel like you relieved all your sexual tension? If after its all over and you still feel like you can't sleep like a baby, most likely you didn't reach an orgasm.
When it comes to women, all of you are different when it comes to reaching an orgasm. Some of you just get a burst of wetness during sex, or body may shake, or thighs start to quiver, or body freezes up, etc. You have to figure out which one is you. But the main key to knowing you had an orgasm is after having sex you feel SATISFIED. When men ejaculate from sex, they immediately feel satisfied. So the question is, after you finish having sex, do you feel satisfied within? Do you feel like you relieved all your sexual tension? If after its all over and you still feel like you can't sleep like a baby, most likely you didn't reach an orgasm.
anatomically, the anterior wall of an adult vagina is 8-9 centimeters.....the posterior wall is longer n is about 10 centimeters...so the vagina gets filled up wid a 11 centimeter ****, a 12 cm one or even a 15 cm one.....so why is it said that women get more pleasure from longer sizes??is it bcuz in the case of a 15 centimeter penis, once it enters 10 cm deep n fills up the vagina, it can stretch the vagina by a further 5 centimeters....n the 11 cm penis can stretch the vagina by a further 1-2 cm?? (im talking abt pleasure women experience during intercourse, not necessarily orgasm)
I think you cant make your partner do this if you dont know ur body, I once tried to masturbate and it was a very good feeling, I will advise you not to go inside when you do it, just play with you clitoris and you reach your climax. then once u know how u get it and then it will be easy to tell ur man,
And when your man is in, u must drive him to your G spot, try to hold his waist like u r pushing him down then he will hit the spot.
And when your man is in, u must drive him to your G spot, try to hold his waist like u r pushing him down then he will hit the spot.
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