Aa
No Sex
I own my own business and I am the bread-winner , she works in the service industry and hates everything about it and is sure to let me know about every single negative part of her day on a nightly basis. I try and listen ever night and tell her that things will get better, and I never complain about my job, even though I have plenty I could complain about but my job truely supports OUR lifestyle. She has hinted about quitting her job and having a child. My only problem is that WE DON'T HAVE SEX!
I buy her gifts, take her on vacations, tell her she's beautiful and when I get angry about our lack of sex I try and discuss it with her rather than yelling . I'm LUCKY to get laid once every two weeks. Usually more like once a month. And I always have to get things started. The sex (when we have it ) usually consists of her laying on her back and telling me to "Hurry Up!". This totally puts me out of the mood.
I try everything to get her aroused. Take her out for drinks = I'm too tired.
Try to stimulate her orally = She thinks it's gross
Buy her a pretty dress= She won't even put it on when we get home.
I've even tried reverse psych and went a month w/o even hinting at sex and I think she was really enjoying it and wished it would have gone on for ever like that.
She says that all she wants is for someone to take care of her. And I completely appreciate this, but I have needs that need taken care of as well. I help around the house, have a cleaning lady come once a week to do the deep cleaning, and I usually end up cooking dinner every night as well.
I am considering ending the relationship because of her lack of sexual desire. If it was up to me we would have sex every other day. I would love to have sex more than once in the same day, but that will never happen.
Is it wrong for me to end a relationship that is perfect in the "friend" department, but a total nightmare in the sexual department? Please help!
I buy her gifts, take her on vacations, tell her she's beautiful and when I get angry about our lack of sex I try and discuss it with her rather than yelling . I'm LUCKY to get laid once every two weeks. Usually more like once a month. And I always have to get things started. The sex (when we have it ) usually consists of her laying on her back and telling me to "Hurry Up!". This totally puts me out of the mood.
I try everything to get her aroused. Take her out for drinks = I'm too tired.
Try to stimulate her orally = She thinks it's gross
Buy her a pretty dress= She won't even put it on when we get home.
I've even tried reverse psych and went a month w/o even hinting at sex and I think she was really enjoying it and wished it would have gone on for ever like that.
She says that all she wants is for someone to take care of her. And I completely appreciate this, but I have needs that need taken care of as well. I help around the house, have a cleaning lady come once a week to do the deep cleaning, and I usually end up cooking dinner every night as well.
I am considering ending the relationship because of her lack of sexual desire. If it was up to me we would have sex every other day. I would love to have sex more than once in the same day, but that will never happen.
Is it wrong for me to end a relationship that is perfect in the "friend" department, but a total nightmare in the sexual department? Please help!
unfortunatly i am in the same position. My husband of 9 years dose not touch me at all. we cuddle and enjoy each other company. I am quite pretty and he always says it is not me it is him. not suer what to do... we have talk about it, tryed any kind of help, he is just not into it and loves his work.. i love him and dont want to leave him as he is the most wonderful husband you can find.. but unfortunatly it is my bad luck
good luck to you
good luck to you
I'm going to try to not be biased here, but she may not be a gold digger. She may just be miserable because she dwells on her job so much...that it just radiates over her entire life....which then trickles down to everything else including your sex life. Some women can really be hell-bent on things. I only say this because I was in a rut like that about 6 months ago, I've been with my boyfriend for 4 years. I got another job and things have completely turned around, sometimes stress just takes over everything with us. I would sit her down and just put everything out there. Tell her that your unhappy, you have suspicions that there isn't love in the relationship...etc. Just be frank that if she doesn't improve her attitude and put in her 50% of the relationship then you'll have to move on. You cant let someone make you miserable just because they are. If she's this unhappy with sex and her job, she's going to be in for a rude awakening with a newborn baby. Let us know how things go, relationships can be tough!
i'm with Gotmoxy on this, but with another perspective. my husband started his own construction business in jan of 07, i worked in health care, but have a degree in construction management, so i hated my job and was envious of my husband. we had just bought a house that needed to be gutted, a contractor's dream, and i quit my job, then the economy crashed.... 3 and 1/2 years later, i haven't been able to find another steady job, we lost our house, struggle to keep the business alive, and guess what, i hate sitting home all day! you wife is lucky to have a job, but she'll probably be just as put out at home. i feel nothing but guilt every minute of every day, but here's the kicker...he still loves me and tells me how lucky he is to have me by his side, i do everything i can to help the business and help him stay sain, even if that means a quicky while the pasta for dinner is cooking or a little oral whan i've got my friend....ANYTHING, why, because i love him! if he gained 40 lbs i would still do it, if he horibly disfigured, i would still do it, if he was in an accident and a quadraphonic i would still try to do it. Gotmoxy's right, she's a gold digger and after child support and alimony, and you should git while the gittin's good. tell her 'put out or git out!'
you sound like a wonderful husband and it sounds like you've done all you can, and it's clear you deserve better!
good luck my friend!
you sound like a wonderful husband and it sounds like you've done all you can, and it's clear you deserve better!
good luck my friend!
Number 1- I am a she, not a he.
Number 2- It's Gotmoxy, not gotmoxi.
Number 3- Being a female, I would know a hell of alot more about the way she is feeling than any other male counterpart. I also have a job that gives me constant grief and stress, and go home venting almost on a daily basis. But, I still enjoy sex and love my man. Also, if she is so unhappy, why would she want to bring a child into the picture? Maybe she thinks it will make her happy, and she can be a stay at home mom, and not feel guilty for not bringing home a paycheck. But honestly, I believe what I said earlier is really what is going on. My best friend just left her fiance of 11 years. She stopped enjoying sex with him long before that. It took her a week after leaving him, to realize that she was no longer in love with him. She now is seeing someone new, and having crazy amounts of sex and ENJOYING it! So, take my word for it, the relationship is probably dead. But, I am only an advisor, not God. I could be wrong. Good luck!
Number 2- It's Gotmoxy, not gotmoxi.
Number 3- Being a female, I would know a hell of alot more about the way she is feeling than any other male counterpart. I also have a job that gives me constant grief and stress, and go home venting almost on a daily basis. But, I still enjoy sex and love my man. Also, if she is so unhappy, why would she want to bring a child into the picture? Maybe she thinks it will make her happy, and she can be a stay at home mom, and not feel guilty for not bringing home a paycheck. But honestly, I believe what I said earlier is really what is going on. My best friend just left her fiance of 11 years. She stopped enjoying sex with him long before that. It took her a week after leaving him, to realize that she was no longer in love with him. She now is seeing someone new, and having crazy amounts of sex and ENJOYING it! So, take my word for it, the relationship is probably dead. But, I am only an advisor, not God. I could be wrong. Good luck!
If she is not happy with her job in the service industry, she is not happy. She probably is too tired and depressed to have sex with you. Have her stop working and look for a new job. See how her mood changes and maybe she will change her libido towards you. After all, it sounds like you are the 'bread earner" in this relationship and you do not need her pay check. what you need is her love. So, maybe she needs to stop working to focus on you and see if she gets a job that she likes better. Do not listen Gotmoxi. He is being to tuff on her. Tell her how you feel, you need her respect and love and give her some freedom to find another job meawhile. After a few months, if she does not change her attitude, listen to Gotmoxi.
There are some serious issues here! The lady...er goldigger you are with, is not in love with you. She is, as you stated, just a friend that wants to be taken care of. I'm suprised she hasn't quit her job yet and just relied on yours. Also, the fact that she wants a child tells you another thing: She can have your child, then end things with you, and rely on your child support payments so that she is always "taken" care of. You need to end things now. If she were into you, she would want to have sex with you. BOTTOM LINE!!!!!!!!!
Take it from me: I am a 28 year old single, hard working, mother of one. My career adds alot of stress to my life, because of the constant pressure for success. I have a wonderful man, with whom I live with. He is an ironworker, and makes good money. He also is a single father of one, with full custody. So, we now have a proper family unit. But, there is also lots of stress involved, with the two of us working, raising two girls ages 6 and 7, one being handicapped, and trying to keep a tidy apartment, while saving for a house. My man enjoys taking care of me, but I also enjoy taking care of him. We even fight over who is going to make dinner sometimes, because we both want to do it! lol
Anyways, enough about my life, oh wait, except for one thing........we have sex! And I enjoy it! Maybe we are just different from other couples, but both of us love sex, and think about it everyday. We also try to do it every night, but sometimes there are issues with girls, etc. The point is, I'm attracted to my man and love him, therefore I want to have sex with him. We always like trying new things and enjoy ourselves. Never do I want him to hurry up and finish.
You need to end this loveless one-sided relationship. You are only hurting yourself by staying. Please do not go and knock her up just so that you can have sex for probably the last time in your relationship, before she leaves you with nothing more than a court order for child support.
Take it from me: I am a 28 year old single, hard working, mother of one. My career adds alot of stress to my life, because of the constant pressure for success. I have a wonderful man, with whom I live with. He is an ironworker, and makes good money. He also is a single father of one, with full custody. So, we now have a proper family unit. But, there is also lots of stress involved, with the two of us working, raising two girls ages 6 and 7, one being handicapped, and trying to keep a tidy apartment, while saving for a house. My man enjoys taking care of me, but I also enjoy taking care of him. We even fight over who is going to make dinner sometimes, because we both want to do it! lol
Anyways, enough about my life, oh wait, except for one thing........we have sex! And I enjoy it! Maybe we are just different from other couples, but both of us love sex, and think about it everyday. We also try to do it every night, but sometimes there are issues with girls, etc. The point is, I'm attracted to my man and love him, therefore I want to have sex with him. We always like trying new things and enjoy ourselves. Never do I want him to hurry up and finish.
You need to end this loveless one-sided relationship. You are only hurting yourself by staying. Please do not go and knock her up just so that you can have sex for probably the last time in your relationship, before she leaves you with nothing more than a court order for child support.
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Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
Discharge often isn't normal, and could mean an infection or an STD.
STDs aren't transmitted through clothing. Fabric is a germ barrier.
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