Sexuality - puberty

[leaoazul]

My son is 12, is a great kid, but sudenly he became obsessed with sex. He masturbates frequently, sometimes in front of othe people. He told us that he masturbated wearing his sister's clothes (lingerie - bra and panties). He said that sometimes he looked at other boys butt's, and that he even looked at his own mother in a lustful way. He is very candid about his actions, and he ends up telling us everything, but he is feeling very ashamed of his actions and thpughts. He even asked rethorically why he is still living, if he is being so bad as a person. I am very worried, specially because all that happened too suddenly, since a few days ago all he thought was cartoons and videogames.
Could you help me understand and deal with that?

[slow_healer]

jml has the right idea. Maybe you need to explain (or rather, get your husband to explain as man-to-man, if possible) that sexuality is another normal part of life. But there's a time and a place for it - in this case, in privacy. Reassure your son that his feelings don't make him a bad person, but he has to learn what is private and not to be discussed in front of other people. Reassure him, that like everyone else, he needs to learn to control his actions and what comes out of his mouth, whether having these feelings or not. Definitely reassure him that he's not a bad person. If he starts acting this way in front of friends and strangers, I'd really start to get worried. But otherwise, good luck!

[jml1986]

While I am sure what your son is doing seems excessive, I think the only thing that makes him different then other 12 year old boys is he is very open about his sexuality. Where most boys would have ideas and thoughts about different ways to masterbate, they would never even consider telling anyone. I think you are very lucky to have a son that trust you enough to talk to you about it, because it gives you a chance to steer him in the right direction as he grows and becomes more sexually active.