Aa
masterbating
hi doctor how r u hope u will b perfect but i have problem from age of 15 now i am 26. i am masturbating from age of 15 and non stop, now there when i see something sexy ma sperm get out of penis and i during masturbation i *** very early, erection problem also very less time of erection and i am still a virgin. i cant b with some girl because of this problem please please help me some and i want to stop masturbation....
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
Hello
Almost everyone feels insecure about masturbation—or self-pleasuring. One of the reasons we’re so uncomfortable with it is because we don’t receive any accurate information, but rather grow up hearing lots of myths which are not supported by factual data. We all want to know that what WE do is OK. From your note, it looks like you feel that it’s somehow harmful or wrong. It sounds like you’re worried that self-pleasuring is some kind of “condition” or illness. Not true. There are no data to indicate that self-pleasuring is in any way harmful.
Please stop worrying and enjoy your life. Accept self-pleasuring as a wonderful gift that keeps on giving.
Here are some facts about self-pleasuring:
It’s the surest way to orgasm and the most effective way to learn about our sexual response cycle, as well as the surest way men to learn orgasmic control. If you feel you come too quickly, the surest way to slow down is to teach yourself a new pattern via self-pleasuring.
Another advantage is self-knowledge: How can you show a partner what you like if you don’t know yourself?
And the #1 reason for self-pleasuring: it’s fun!
Self-pleasuring is a part of who you are sexually—for your whole life, not just when you don’t have a partner. People self-pleasure from birth to death, when they’re alone and when they’re partnered. It’s just one of many options we have as sexual beings. It’s not better or worse than partner sex, just different—like steak is different than chicken.
Remember that all our scientific data show that the people who take responsibility for their OWN pleasure have the best sex lives and rate themselves as happiest about their sexuality.
Regarding lasting longer: Many men find it helpful to change their behavior and attitude, which means examining some of the reasons why you’re not lasting as long as you would like.
During their early self-pleasuring experiments, many men learn a very quick orgasm pattern in order to avoid detection—like in the bathroom (“You’ve been in there for hours! What are you doing?”) Learning to come quickly with a partner can also set up this pattern. Guilt and anxiety about sex may also create a situation where some men just want to get it over with quickly so they won’t have to deal with any of those feelings. And, of course, if you’re focused on “performing,” rather than just enjoying yourself, your penis can become incredibly stubborn and uncooperative. And if being sexual with your wife is new to you, it may take awhile to get over your anxiety. Anything new can be scary.
Once you learn to control your orgasm, realize that each man has an individual orgasmic pattern unique to him. A lot of this anxiety about “premature” ejaculation is based on paranoia, and the idea that it's somehow ideal to have erections last way longer than they tend to realistically for most men, most of the time. Sure, sometimes, a man might last 15 minutes, 30 minutes, even an hour, but 75% of all males have an orgasm within 2 minutes of beginning penis-vagina (p-v) sex. I wonder if you’ve asked your wife how long SHE’d like you to last? Are you thinking that if you last longer, somehow she’ll have an orgasm during p-v sex? The fact is that most women DON’T orgasm during p-v sex. It’s a much more effective way for men to orgasm than women, so please don’t attempt to reach some kind of “orgasmic goal” because you think it will ultimately please her.
That said, here are some techniques for lasting longer:
First, slow down during self-pleasuring and unlearn that old pattern of quick orgasm. Try teasing yourself by stimulating yourself just to the point where you feel you’re about to orgasm, then backing off and relaxing, and then beginning again. This will give you a sense of control as well as teach you to recognize your own point of no return (when you know you're about to have an orgasm, no matter what). Another thing to try is when you feel yourself getting close to orgasm, relax, breathe deeply, and cease movement. Some men also find they last longer if they have an orgasm on their own awhile before beginning partner sex. This tends to take the edge off, if you will.
Once you feel in control of your orgasm, you can also examine whether you have any feelings of discomfort with being sexual—either with yourself or with a partner. These feelings of discomfort can create extreme conflict and cause you to feel the need to get it over with quickly. They can also cause so much anxiety that your penis doesn't want to become erect. If you look at sex as something to finish quickly—get it up, get it in, get it off—you’ll need to let go of that old mentality. And naturally, any relationship conflicts or conflicted feelings about sex can also contribute to discomfort. Best of luck to you. Dr. J
Almost everyone feels insecure about masturbation—or self-pleasuring. One of the reasons we’re so uncomfortable with it is because we don’t receive any accurate information, but rather grow up hearing lots of myths which are not supported by factual data. We all want to know that what WE do is OK. From your note, it looks like you feel that it’s somehow harmful or wrong. It sounds like you’re worried that self-pleasuring is some kind of “condition” or illness. Not true. There are no data to indicate that self-pleasuring is in any way harmful.
Please stop worrying and enjoy your life. Accept self-pleasuring as a wonderful gift that keeps on giving.
Here are some facts about self-pleasuring:
It’s the surest way to orgasm and the most effective way to learn about our sexual response cycle, as well as the surest way men to learn orgasmic control. If you feel you come too quickly, the surest way to slow down is to teach yourself a new pattern via self-pleasuring.
Another advantage is self-knowledge: How can you show a partner what you like if you don’t know yourself?
And the #1 reason for self-pleasuring: it’s fun!
Self-pleasuring is a part of who you are sexually—for your whole life, not just when you don’t have a partner. People self-pleasure from birth to death, when they’re alone and when they’re partnered. It’s just one of many options we have as sexual beings. It’s not better or worse than partner sex, just different—like steak is different than chicken.
Remember that all our scientific data show that the people who take responsibility for their OWN pleasure have the best sex lives and rate themselves as happiest about their sexuality.
Regarding lasting longer: Many men find it helpful to change their behavior and attitude, which means examining some of the reasons why you’re not lasting as long as you would like.
During their early self-pleasuring experiments, many men learn a very quick orgasm pattern in order to avoid detection—like in the bathroom (“You’ve been in there for hours! What are you doing?”) Learning to come quickly with a partner can also set up this pattern. Guilt and anxiety about sex may also create a situation where some men just want to get it over with quickly so they won’t have to deal with any of those feelings. And, of course, if you’re focused on “performing,” rather than just enjoying yourself, your penis can become incredibly stubborn and uncooperative. And if being sexual with your wife is new to you, it may take awhile to get over your anxiety. Anything new can be scary.
Once you learn to control your orgasm, realize that each man has an individual orgasmic pattern unique to him. A lot of this anxiety about “premature” ejaculation is based on paranoia, and the idea that it's somehow ideal to have erections last way longer than they tend to realistically for most men, most of the time. Sure, sometimes, a man might last 15 minutes, 30 minutes, even an hour, but 75% of all males have an orgasm within 2 minutes of beginning penis-vagina (p-v) sex. I wonder if you’ve asked your wife how long SHE’d like you to last? Are you thinking that if you last longer, somehow she’ll have an orgasm during p-v sex? The fact is that most women DON’T orgasm during p-v sex. It’s a much more effective way for men to orgasm than women, so please don’t attempt to reach some kind of “orgasmic goal” because you think it will ultimately please her.
That said, here are some techniques for lasting longer:
First, slow down during self-pleasuring and unlearn that old pattern of quick orgasm. Try teasing yourself by stimulating yourself just to the point where you feel you’re about to orgasm, then backing off and relaxing, and then beginning again. This will give you a sense of control as well as teach you to recognize your own point of no return (when you know you're about to have an orgasm, no matter what). Another thing to try is when you feel yourself getting close to orgasm, relax, breathe deeply, and cease movement. Some men also find they last longer if they have an orgasm on their own awhile before beginning partner sex. This tends to take the edge off, if you will.
Once you feel in control of your orgasm, you can also examine whether you have any feelings of discomfort with being sexual—either with yourself or with a partner. These feelings of discomfort can create extreme conflict and cause you to feel the need to get it over with quickly. They can also cause so much anxiety that your penis doesn't want to become erect. If you look at sex as something to finish quickly—get it up, get it in, get it off—you’ll need to let go of that old mentality. And naturally, any relationship conflicts or conflicted feelings about sex can also contribute to discomfort. Best of luck to you. Dr. J
thanks Doctor but wat i have to i am still unmarried and what about my Siemens leakage...? :-( i cant even pray cause of this Siemens leakage and this low kind of erection....
I`m 42 and having very normal sex life till my second child was born.after that my wife gradually denying me to have intercourse due to tiredness and privacy problem as she said, day by day i`m habituated to master bet and now i feel much pleasure compare to physical intercourses.
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