sleep apnea and other medical conditions

[dene1966]

I have sleep apnea I guess I stop breathing about 22 times an hr all night long. I know that I HAVE had this since childhood there is no doubt about it. I was a little hyper butt, I could never consentrate at all as a little girl. I was held back in the middle of my 5th yr (embarassing) I wasnt treated right as a child at all. I think they thought I had other things wrong with me. Thank goodness  I had lots of therapy as my mother has mental illness. (they said it was DPD). I know it was very difficult for me.
My son Trevor has the same thing. He has the beginning stages of it they call it "upper respitory resistance syndrome". He also has pain, fatigue, neuro problems. My question is how the heck do raise a child that doesnt feel well? How high do you set the bar?  how understanding should I be? right now he is almost 16 and in treatment for pot addiction. Its very sad. He also has a serious anger problem. He is coming home this sat. He has been gone for two months. I really do miss him.

Deanne

[KatEyes]

Hi again. When you say cpap "didn't work" does that mean it didn't correct his nighttime breathing issues or that he had trouble using it? If I had not happened upon a cpap support group at cpaptalk I would never have been able to use the equipment. It may not fix his other issues, but if he corrects this one, that's a step in the right direction.

There are some college age people in that support group who deal with these issues. And there are some people who really aren't totally "fixed" by cpap, like those have been shown to have an inset jawbone partially narrowing the airway. Or those who were given a nasal mask but their septum is deviated and they can't breathe thru their nose.  People's situations are so varied, and sometimes complex enough that one sleep study could have been just a piece of the puzzle. Please encourage your son that what he's done so far is a beginning in finding solutions, but to please not stop without answers and solutions.

[Suri123]

Hi dene1966, how are you? Thanks again for your thoughts. Hope you might be able to get some rest and comforting yourself for some time. It is good to hear Trevor is doing well as I said change in place and people will be helpful. Now since he is enjoying his stay, may be he would not think about going for drugs and also he would be doing great in helping your mom. Hope he understands his responsibilities better and does even good at his part-time. Take care and share your thoughts.

[dene1966]

He is very good with my mom. There is a father figure there so he doesnt dare act up. I dont know about speciality Drs there.
He only has 30 days for school. He is going to do school on-line this summer.
My mom lives on a small farm so there is alot for him to do to help. He is sixteen on the 12th so he can get a job. He has already found one (my mom helped) he has been fishing and having a blast.

Dene

[dene1966]

Yes, he does have a documented sleep problem (he was tested through children’s hospital in Seattle). His sleep stages are messed up. The poor child is trying to treat himself with drugs I have always thought that. He has chronic pain and fatigue daily. They did give a c-pap but that didn’t work.

I think the nerve problems might have something to do with the sleep problem too. His arms and legs change color. They also said he has a thing called RSD reflex neurovascular syndrome, and fibromyalgia. It could be some kind of arthritis. I don’t know.

[KatEyes]

Hi. I do hope you are able to take good care of yourself so as to better withstand the stress. Are you using a cpap machine to treat your sleep apnea?

If your son has long standing sleep issues such as UARS and his sleep stages have been disrupted for a long time, it may be that his sleep problems have caused his mood swings and played a role in his feeling the need to self medicate thru drugs. Did his sleep study show much disruption? If you can show him there's a medical cause for some of his torment as well as medical solutions, it may help him in dealing with his drug use, and the sooner the better. Some insurances cover a machine for UARS, others do not. Hope this info helps.

[Suri123]

HI dene1966, how are you and how is Trevor doing? I do agree, it is very difficult to make them understand the consequences once a person gets addicted to drug and how life turns out to be hell thereafter. Indeed it was a good idea to have Trevor see real sufferers of drug addiction, but will he keep his cool and try to keep away as your mom might find little difficulty in controlling him. Are there good specialty hospitals if he requires medical care? How is he doing with his studies now? Take care and share your thoughts.

[dene1966]

Wow life is hard. I had to let/made my son live with my mom in Idaho. Trevor spent 42 days in inpatient drug treatment only to come home for a day and do cocaine. He went out in the night for three hours in the night without permission. I had appt already scheduled to have a check up, so I asked for a UA

The good thing is he is on top of a mountain, so it will take him a bit to find the user kids again.
The night he left we brought him to a real drug addict that started just like Trevor. This man was 28 and had been a professional snow boarder sponcered by VOLCOM now, he is barely alive. The man had tried to kill himself 3 days before Trevor saw him, he had his wrists all stitched up. They sat and told Trevor stories that put my son in tears. (trevor never crys) It was very powerful. He said he is never going to drugs again. We will see! If he was here it wouldnt have worked, as every single friend is on drugs.
Dene

[Suri123]

Hi dene1966, how are you? I appreciate your thoughts and concerns for your son. You need to be cautious in avoiding him to go with his friends and i understand the reason behind. You can speak to him freely and let him know how he can make use of his time in a better way and still keep touch with his studies. A change in place and people around will certainly have some impact so hope at your mom's place he may do well. It is good to know he does not have any testis problems and so be happy about it. You need to take some rest and not to exert too much. I feel it may be good to get a behavioral therapist counseling. Take care and share your thoughts.

[dene1966]

I have to say its not easy with Trevor back at home. Im very tired and stressed, his mood is all over the place. He is very angry all the time

The growth  around his testicle turned out to be nothing, So that is good, he doesnt have to worry about that.

I think his health is okay. He does have a lot of anxiety. I have let his friends come around and let him out for a few hours at a time then I pick him up.

My 20 yr old daughter went and bought him a cell phone today. Not good, now he has all his druggie friends at his finger tips.
He is going to see my mom on wednesday for a week then coming back for a court appt. He could live there but I dont want to give up yet, It breaks my heart.

I am starting to not feel well again. (joint pain) not sleeping well etc... I have to stay well so that I can take care of my younger son and continue my schooling and the classes that I teach.

If anyone needs to talk about their teens, feel free to write.

Deanne

[Suri123]

Hi dene 1966, how are you and how is Trevor? Thanks for your reply. Relax, giving his age, normal overall health, time and slow growth, it might not be a cancer however you can get him examined by a surgeon in your next hospital visit. Ask him to cut down on his smoking if cannot give it up at once. He is home so let he relax and spend some time with friends. Weekend short outings may make him feel good. Do update on his doctor advice and any investigation. Take care.

[dene1966]

The bump thing is okay. Just huge mood swings

[dene1966]

He is home and okay. He did get to see his friends (they are also in out-patient for marijuana addiction). I took them all to pizza, they all left happy.

Trevor just told me that he found a lump on his testicle about 8 months ago and its growing a little. That was right when he started smoking pot really heavy. That might have been why he was so depressed, that, and not having a Dad really hurts him.

Its a good thing I am taking him to the Dr on friday. Now, the nerve stuff doesnt seem as important until I find out what the lump is. I told him not to worry it could be a couple of different things. I dont think we have any cancer in my family not sure about his fathers. Trevor is worried about his health he is very quiet, but told me so today.
It makes me feel bad. He doesnt complain that often.

Dene

[Suri123]

Hi dene1966, thanks for your reply and updating on your son medical care you plan to go-ahead. He need to be relaxed and do not tight schedule his holidays only for getting him evaluated and just running around hospitals/doctors. It is a good idea to get him checked up fully as he is in his vacations, but speak to him to know how he wants to spend his time and do accordingly. Disorders those run in family need not always affect all members in family, so relax. Keep me updated after your doctor visits. Take care.

[dene1966]

I pick him up at 8am tomorrow at the treatment center. I think for the first few weeks he might try to behave we will see. I still have the appt for the depression for him. I am going to bring him to the regular doctor right away and have labs done and a physical. We have arthritis in our family, I just want to make sure we arent missing anything. Then, I will take him to the neurologist, possibly Rheumetology. How does that sound?

Deanne

[Suri123]

Hi dene1966, how are you and how is your son doing? Well, you keep up the appointment and let the specialist assess him initially for his angerness. He may be required to get the help of behavior therapist. There is lot of causes for the upper airway resistance, once he is investigated properly, the plan of care can be discussed. I feel he need not be referred to a neurologist; you may take him for an appointment directly. Take care and update on his progress.

[dene1966]

I have an appt for him to see someone on the 28th this man is a specialist in anger issues with substance abuse issues.
When he was evaluated at childrens hospital. The tested showed upper airway resistance. I think I will have to make an appt with the regular dr first then be sent to a neurologist from there.
My son is very depressed Im worried about that.

Deanne

[Suri123]

Hi dene1966, thanks for your reply. How are you and how is your son? It is a good idea to get a consultation from a sleep specialist and neurologist at the same time as your son would be coming home. Causes for the airway obstruction can be many and needs sleep study to know about the sleep disturbance and may be ENT doctor can examine for any structural or upper airway disorders. At young age getting angry always or on very minor matter needs to be counseled by a behavioral therapist. He needs your love and care, so please have patience in taking care of him till he is able to take care of himself. Update once you consult your doctor. Take care.

[dene1966]

We have both seen specialists. I have sleep disturbances (22 times an hr) his is different. I know I have obstructive, I didnt know there was different types of obstructive. I think having him looked at by a neurologist is a good idea.

thanks
DENE

[Suri123]

Hi dene 1966, how are you? Are you able to have good sleep now? You may be right in guessing about you having Sleep apnea but it is better to label so after doing a sleep study and evaluation by sleep specialist. Most of people may suffer with sleep apnea but not all face the sleep disturbance. Even your son needs to be investigated in proper manner to know the cause of his upper airway obstruction and other neurological symptoms. How is his general health? As a mother you need to give him all love and care he needs at least for few more years. Weekend family outings or get-togethers might have positive impact. You may get him consulted by a neurologist for complete check up. Take care and share your thoughts.