Empathy or Sympathy

[Karey17]

I wonder if anyone here has been able to define their own responses to another person's upsetting situations?

Sympathy, in my view is falling down the hole with them. Whereas empathy means seeing clearly and compassionately their predicament but keeping one foot firmly balanced on solid ground, whilst offering help.

Sometimes I jump in the hole. It's tough realising this at times. Has anyone else felt like this ??

[dawnangela]

Thanks for the invite into this group and Thank you Karey for you kind words...Dawn

[teko]

First of all, I would like to say Thankyou for the invite!


Empathy to me is seeing a situation from a view of one who has been in it or something similar, therefore having a better understanding of what one is experiencing in that given situation.

Sympathy on the otherhand to me is feeling for one going thru what is to me, a horrendous or sad situation that I may not totally understand nor care to.

[Karey17]

I liked it that you said ... I don't know...  I think that's great to be able to acknowledge gaps.

Many people jump straight in, and sometimes end up covered with embarresment.

I appreciate your honesty.

I hope you have a good day today

[dawnangela]

I dont know on this one..they are both so similar...Empathy to me is still showing some sort of sympathy to a person..Dawn.

[Crochetya]

When I have empathy for someone, the short of it is I understand your pain, I may not have experienced it, but I recognize that you are in pain and just being human I have compassion for you as a person. Sympathy, on the other hand is an experience that you have witnessed and you have felt the same hurt at one time or another. If you could relieve the person of this pain you would. Pity is a totally different thing. That is when you dive in with both feet and both hands to try and fix or remove the pain because you are feeling sorry for the person. This is like taking a class, the person has to do it for themselves. You cannot go to school for someone else. These are very hard to decifier, especially when it is a person you love or is close to you.

I prefer to look in the box, instead of being on the inside looking out.  I am able to keep my head this way.

[Dazon50]

Yes...I found that boundary and that the lines were movable.

I crossed them, of course, in my ignorance and that takes us back to "failure' and what it teaches.  I know can recognize some things when I run/walk/crawl up to them.  Like here on Medhelp.  I cannot solve any other person's problems any more than they can mine.  However, I care, and I can pull for, with, pray for, hope for, come alongside of in the ways possible, grieve for and with, listen to, be honest with, speak up, be quiet and appreciate qualities I see or that are brought up, admire, be inspired and encouraged and do the same I hope to others, etc....but the choices are others to make as mine are.

I can understand much of why I am who I am.  I remember someone saying to me many years ago during a darker time in my life---"Have you ever considered that you are the miracle in having survived"?  That haunted me & I didn't understand it at the time to value it for what it was/is.  

I can now say that to others in a similar way......Survivors are a testament to the human spirit/will and a powerful one at that.

:-)))

[Karey17]

As ever you have hit the nail on the head. I think you have a sound grasp of the differences between empathy and sympathy.

Have you ever felt during your career as a Carer that sometimes you have slipped over the edge into identifying too closely with another's pain?

Sometimes in my counselling training I had to stop myself from embracing the whole of their anguish.

I notice that I'm doing this with my ex brother-in law. He's just gone through a horrific divorce from my sister. It's bringing up all kinds of stuff for me.

Finding I need to strengthen my Ego boundaries.

I commend you for your generosity. I see that you are a nuturing and giving person. Caring can be both challenging and rewarding for you I think??

[Dazon50]

That is an interesting way of putting it, Karey :-))

When I was doing caregiving, I called it "sitting on the log with".  Sometimes we "howled at the moon together".  It focused on "being with"..."coming alongside of"...in other words, my spirit was with.  I couldn't "do for" as I am not  the other person.

Empathy to me is identifiying with...entering into the moment with. It is feeling/understanding ...a knowing in a sense.

Sympathy means I feel for/towards.  I say...you have my sympathy....I choose to give it to you letting you know I care.

Empathy is a type of stepping into the shoes of .

:-)))))  Lots to both