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help with step son thats 8

help i have been married for 2 years now, my husband has 1 child at home that we raise he is 8 1/2 now was 5 when we started dating, i just dont have any motherly feeling toward him, im not mean i just not lovey toward him, the boy wants to argue all the time, every thing i say he talks back to , he gives me go to hell looks every time i get on to him,my husband gets mad at me, it to the point i dont want to be around the boy, cause i know if i say something as simple as , kid you take the trash out ,  he will say i'm going do it later or dad said, when tell him he needs to take it out now , he will agrue, im so tired of the argueing and talking back, that im ready to give up, my husband gets mad cause his son and mine relationship not closer, what can i do
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