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Avatar universal

Crash Down, clinical depression, anxiety, chronic stress, OCD, pain and inflammation, sleep problems without medication

There is lots has gone and is currently going on with me.  I will try to be as short and as clear as possible.

I have been struggling with crash down for 4 years. I had bad sleeping habits for like from early teens to sometimes even now- like sleeping late around 12-2  am.  From ages 17-19 I was sleeping late and going to school without breakfast most of the time.
and this eventually led to my mental illness anxiety, clinical major psychotic depression, and OCD for 5 years now.  

My crash down is better than before but I have not recovered from mental illness.
First time I was treated with during Winter 2007 tripletail, seroquol, effexor for 9 months.

I came off medication and I felt so drained that I could not do anything over Summer of 2008.

After being off medication for 4 months my illness came back in Fall 2008 and I received inection of cojectin, copixol, and ativan, and then physiatrist prescribed celexa and seroquol, and then switched from seroquol to olonzapine because serouqol was not working well.  Doctor said I have to take these for at least a year, and might forever.  I did take these for a year, and Summer of 2009 was so weird- I ate breakfast, took celexa and rest, bowl movement then rest, lunch and then rest or nap and rest after dinner and go to sleep after olonzapine makes me sleep after 4 hours.  I don’t know why this was happening and neither did doctor.

I came off celexa as said by physiatrist, and took olonzapine as required, but if I don’t take olonzapine for long time say 1 month my symptoms reappear and I have to take olonzapine to help me.

I have difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep.  I also have low energy, no drive and aches and pains, physical injuries not healing and thus chronic inflammation and poor sleep when I don’t take medication olonzapine.

I have tried natural remedies as prescribed by a naturopath like St. John Wort, GABA, adrenum for adrenal gland fatigue. melatoin, B-vitamins, vitamin- B6, homeopathic remedies.

Adreum, GABA, melatoin helped me to some extent.  When I am on them I am relaxed but it’s too relaxing.  On top of this when I am done with these products my condition shows up again.

I have read about SAMe for sleep and mood.  Has anyone tried it?

I am afraid that I have to these psychotropics forever.  This is what physiatrist say, which I doubted at first now it is becoming realty.  The longer I stay on olonzapine, the greater chances of side effects especially diabetes which runs in my family and other dangerous side effects which they say nothing will happen since you are only 23.

I asked my GP to do some blood test for inflammatory markers like cortisol, homocysteine, but she is like this stuff is for old people- “You are too young for this.”  If  I am too young why I have no energy, poor sleep concentration, injuries not healing, inflammation, poor circulation and they don’t heal by themselves?  I visited her in February and she said “ I can’t help you much.”  I was thinking to check these out as well- DHEA, Testosterone, C-reactive protein,  and low blood. Imbalances in these are shown to cause depression as well. After last visit I really resent seeing her again.

I tried looking finding doctors that will take me, but they are full and are not accepting any new patients.  It’s frustrating.

What should I do?  I already have healthy active lifestyle. I eat pretty clean, avoid too much carbs and sugar, good fats, and protein.  I can only do light exercise like walking or some sports like tennis and basketball with little running because of chronic ankle pain after exercise and sometimes during.

I am getting some acupuncture and is somewhat helpful as I don’t really see any big improvements.  Little is better than nothing.  The doctor said it will take at least 10 treatments to see big improvements. She also said your habits are why I am struggling with many health issues physical and mental.

What can I do besides acupuncture to get going?  I want to feel energetic when I wake up and want to have desire and energy to be productive- study or work.   I dropped out of school because of my illness, low energy, sleep problems, pains etc.

I know there is no easy solution but anything is better than nothing.  I have also tried multi-vitamin mineral supplement, glutamine, whey protein, probiotic for constipation, Cal/Mag, Vitamin D. Omega 3, Vit. C, and nothing works.  I am sensitive to winter and can’t do much compared to summer.  I rest in beginning summer and then I get better overall in last few months of summer.  I had SAD light this winter and it did help.  Looks like serious SAD.

Finances are an issue as well.  I was thinking about counselling but just thinking about going there just stresses me out.

I was thinking to take supplements after reading about them like L-Carnitine, Alpha Lipoic Acid and Taurine for energy, strength and may get me going.  After much reading L-Carntine is better absorbed through food. Aceylated- Carnitine, which is another form is more bio available but problem is it carries fatty acids that comes with supplement instead of using fat of body.  

After reading much about ALA,  I am thinking to give this a try since it really applies to me.  I know it may sound desperate, but I really had enough of “can’t do much” for last 6 years.  It detoxifies liver and clogged liver and liver strain also cause depression, fatigue, poor circulation and etc.

What else can I do?

11 Responses
1358486 tn?1277562754
Hey I am so sorry to hear about your plithe. Have you ever had your thyroid tested? It controls vertually every organ and can greatly affect mood. Also the hippothalmus.  Hope this is your resolution.  
good luck and god bless
1356258 tn?1277667850
I am so sorry to hear about your struggles. If the anti-depressants, anti-anxiety, anti-psychotic medications don't seem to be working than maybe your issue is hormonal (however, do not go off any medication without talking to a doctor). Also, these medications probably have side-effects like weight gain or you could feel kind of floaty and not like yourself. Your doctor should at least be willing to run some simple tests, or maybe they could refer you to an endocrinologist for testing. Please try to find another doctor if they refuse to consider anything you say.

Hypothyroidism could cause weight gain, aches and pains, depression, irritability, fatigue etc, so they should look at Free T3, T4, TSH and antibodies such as thyroid peroxidase (my friend had Hashimoto's disease and the antibody was the only thing really off). Cushing's disease (high cortisol levels) could cause weight gain, muscle and joint aches, depression, anxiety, even psychosis, poor healing of infections, insomnia, etc. and may very well be your problem (have them do a 24 hour urine cortisol test, late-night salivary cortisol, dexamethasone suppression test, maybe at several different times if you have cyclical Cushing's). Addison's is low cortisol and could be a problem. Also have them check prolactin, growth hormone or IGF-1, FSH, LH, testosterone, ferritin (iron levels for possible anemia), vitamin-D, Epstein Barr Virus (mono, though it shouldn't last that long), lyme disease. Maybe you are just depressed, but that shouldn't affect wound healing. My friend was first diagnosed with major depression and put on Celexa (with therapy) before he got referred to an Endocrinologist and was diagnosed with thyroid disease, low testosterone and possible cyclical Cushing's disease. Goodluck with everything.
1138687 tn?1548647578
It sounds like you have a good understanding of medication, and suplimentation options. And it is very good that you are eating healthy. But, I eat pretty darn healthily, and it certainly helps, but depression and the fatigue it can create is enough to keep you drained.. no matter how properly you treat your body. This is because your main difficulty it sounds, is your mental health, or spiritual health.. which can get better!  btw, what are your "habits" your doc talks about?  So do you know what in your like has caused your depression? I think that is what you want to address!

I created a group called "Your Life Story" if you would like to join, if you think it will help. I posted my story there also, and include a bit on how I see things such as illness, and how I think we can heal. Take care!  :)
Avatar universal
I thank all of you for suggestions that might get me better.  I thought no one is going to take time to read what I posted.


I had my Thyroid hormone test done many times and always came back normal range.  I believe I never had done or my GP ever did full Thyroid hormones test.

This is a pretty comprehensive list of things.  You sure know your info regarding this mental health.  You also raised good point about injuries not healing and that should heal even with depression.  My naturopath told me and I believe myself since I crashed down, the body will try to get back in balance or homeostasis from within then look at healing physical/ muscle joint injuries.  Maybe this is wrong?  

As for weight I was overweight 2 years ago 170 lbs and then 190 when I first started these pills.  They really increase your appetite.  Then, came to 165-152-145-140lbs- and now shifts between 138-139 lbs.  I am 5’8’’. I am underweight now. I discussed with doctor and I said why such weight loss, she said its good now your BMI is normal range.  I am like so I lost mostly muscle and bone mass, which I did lose since I am inactive for last year.  I want to lose fat not muscle/bone.  She doesn’t know what can she do for me.

I will try to get this list to my GP, which I doubt will care enough to order all these tests for me.  She things I am worrying too much and say you read too much on Internet etc.  I told her I keep living like this and no one is helping so I have to look into myself.  She just thinks I am young so nothing can happen to me.


Bad habits include:  sometimes sleeping late during elementary and junior school, sleeping late around 12-2 am and going to school without breakfast most of the days, during last 2 years I really felt so tired and I felt like I have too push myself against some inertia.  I am also sensitive to cold weather and don’t like lack of sunshine.  I am immigrant to Canada as well, this is also another reason because everything is different there, and adjustment factor etc.  I moved from one city where I lived 1 year to another where I live now.  On top of this I really did not make any close friends.  Everyone I find is full of themselves and I really don’t like that, plus they are busy or they pretend to be busy.

I made some friends at university, but I am not in touch with them because I can’t do school or work and I feel telling about my condition is embarrassing.   They will think he is making things up. Because of my illness I find I withdraw myself from other people. I also feel guilty when I can’t do anything.  I really have missed a lot like hanging out with friends, going to places, etc.  I find I am stuck in my home most of the time and only go out in evening to walk, play some sports.  I feel much better thanks to warmer weather but just not well enough to be able to do things, and feel good about myself.

The cause can be bad habits, is somewhat physical- injuries/ inflammation can cause depression, poor general health, no close friends which are to make when you are not doing school or work, and most importantly poor finances.

When you say you eat pretty darn healthily, what do you mean you eat besides eating lean meat, good fats like olive and omega-3, whole grains and lots of fruits and vegetables and no or very little sugar.   I can’t afford organic which is best.  What do you think about milk?  There is controversy that milk is so acidic that makes our bodies leach calcium to neutralize acid forming nature of milk.  Plus, casein in milk is very difficult to digest and is very different from human milk and thus puts our body in metabolic imbalances.  There are studies to actually prove this.  One was done in Harvard school of medicine.  And humans are only ones who drink other species milk.  Milk is for young offspring (calve) to nourish and grow and then they wean of mother’s milk.  We are the only ones who continue drinking it.  I heard raw milk is better for consuming but there are risks for infection with microbes and selling raw milk is illegal in Canada.   Milk is excellent source but absorption of nutrients is questionable.  I get mucus when I drink milk so I avoid it most of the time.

Take care everyone

1138687 tn?1548647578
Hey, sorry if the reply is late, I forgot to check the "add to watch list" box. But you sound exactly like me when I was 22 actually. I used to say the exact same thing about milk, that humans are the only species that drink milk after babyhood" But I worded exactly how you did, with the same points, and I'm sure you have a point about milk. And I was vegan from age 22-26. Traveling the world converted me back to eating dairy and meat. Also, the would corrupted me as much as it opened my mind. As it was reentry culture shock that is the umbrella term and cause of my illness.

I actually don't drink milk, and I haven't been eating meet either. But I find my diet to be working alright these days. The dairy I eat is yogurt, and cheeses (lasagna and pizza and creemchese) and Keefer! but that's about it for dairy. You know, while it is true that humans are the only dairy consumers throughout life, most all human cultures survive off it. My newest view is that we have evolved and it works out and it's not bad.. to consume dairy, but it is best to consume cultured dairy.

People are arrogant, namely here in America it is what we are good at, unfortunately. So you are right about people being full of themselves. I happen to not appreciate most of people fully and I find myself being rather alone. But I still love people, and find appreciation with them. Also, I am vulnerable due to my illness, and can't handle stupidity.. I guess I am trying to find myself.  What I have learned I believe so far is that it is good to be sincere with ourselves, and not give into and be influenced by the craziness of today's society, but definitely work on finding yourself and what really makes you happy. For example, aspire to fulfilling your life with the occupation that is for you, and try to understand what you are looking for in a relationship, or relationships in general. I am one to believe that everyone has a full potential, and I think that there is beauty in struggle, struggle is the only thing that makes us beautiful. And our suffering comes from lack of understanding, and not learning the lessons our pain is trying to teach us, or not seeing the beauty our inevitable struggle gives us. In other words I think that all of these challenges you face have the potential to find yourself and become humble and happy. I'm still working on this in my life, but I refer people to Thich Nhat Hanh, a spiritual leader alive today. Google, "a collective awakening for the future of our planet", and watch the most recent video. He has written many books, but you can also learn from him online, as I think its best. You get to see and hear him!

Definitely get into a routine. have you heard the saying: Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man wealthy healthy and wise. I'm sure it would do the same for a woman though :)

I also hear that breakfast is the most important meal. I agree, and I have been going to bed early and eating a big breakfast, and feel like I couldn't be treating myself better!! But if you don't go to bed early you wont be hungry for breakfast. This sleep schedule should also make you feel alive and productive. And drink lots of water! Two glasses each morning I hear is great for you. I do all this gladly and I think it makes all the difference actually.

There are a lot of different kinds of people, and you can find the social life fit for you! I don't make plans or hardly hang out with people, but I am socially engaged and being alone may mean that there is space for a significant other.. someone maybe in your situation, like you! Many nice people are in your same situation.

Well not exactly sure what more I should say but feel free to write me!
Avatar universal
One more reason that can cause central nervous system depression is blood pH, it should be constant around 7.25-7.35.  I hope this is correct range.  I read this in Chemistry textbook.  Last time when doc (not GP) did pH was 7.0 and I was feeling better during that time. Since then I have been down and I asked my GP to run this test, she said "don't need it."  I will try to get tests done through some other docs.
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way off the beaten track!, BC
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