Fiancee is grumpy,had a stroke

[yone22]

Hi, My fiancee just returned from the hospital this morning,and his mood is rotten.Our kittens caused a teensy ordeal,yet he is angry,told me numerous times to leave him alone,and said "I love you,too,in a riled up way.Last night,I goaded to this man,helped him home and to bed,and I even fed him a few spoonfuls of Cheerios! He said he appreciates my help,that he wanted to rest.So here I am asking, As his future beloved wife,with no legal rite of my own,what can I personally do to help him without nurses? Also he is 74-years-old,and he usually doesn't act like this toward me.Any advice?

[pineapple67]

my husband had a stroke to the right frontal lobe 9/4/07. since then he has become a compulsive monster. he's 59 years old, i'm 53. this is his second stroke. his 1st stroke wasn't as bad and he didn't act like this. example; one day last week i was sick in bed with a stomach virus. vomiting everytime i even thought about getting out of bed or tried drinking water. my husband got it in his mind that he had a doctor's appointment. he sat outside in our car all afternoon angry because i wouldn't take him to the doctor. all the explaining in the world couldn't convince him that he didn't have a doctors appointment.  he told me if i was half as sick as he was i would know what being sick was.yesterday he wanted me to take him to see the new football stadium being built in dallas. my daughter is bring her boyfriend into town later this week and i told him i had alot of cleaning to catch up on since i was sick last week and again he sat in the car all afetrnoon and pouted. saturday we had a wedding to go to that started at 6:30 pm. by 1:00 pm he was dressed suit coat and all standing in the front yard in 90 degree heat waiting for us to leave for the wedding. we finally left at 5:00 pm.

i try to explain things to him and he gets angry saus he understands but he clearly doesn't. the doctors are no help. they have given himm all the mood altering medication they say they can. he only takes cat naps. he keeps me up all night long and i still try to work. the only peae i get is at work. i can honestly say that if we wern't married, i would be gone. i wouldn't sign up for years of this abuse. but i am signed up for it and there is no changing that. i can only think he would stay by my side if the same happened to me. i understand he is going through alot, but i just wish he could understand a little in return.

[vega1318]

depending on where his stroke hit him, his personality may have changed.  you should talk to his doctor and ask him what effects did the stroke have on your fiancee.   In addition, however, recovering from stroke is no easy matter:  he may be getting frustrated by his deficits whatever those may be and all you can do in that case is be patient and supportive.