I'm just about done trying. I really am. My name is... I'm afraid to say really anything about me. I'm really paranoid, I think someone I know will search my name and see this. It is Connor. I'm 15, almost 16. I've been "bottling up" or otherwise suppressing my emotions for about 3 years, I've went through a lot of emotional trauma as well. Moving Schools, losing family members, losing friends... I was a new student at my school this year for sophomore year. I pushed away everyone that tried to be my friend due to me thinking I wasn't good enough. Being gay doesn't help. I grew up with people that made fun of gays, it took me years to finally accept that that is who I am and stuff. I've sat alone all year at lunch, but I'm so good at lying about what and how I feel that people assume I have friends... That I have a life. I can't look at myself in the mirror anymore. I eat poorly, as in rarely. I'm not overweight or anything. I think about suicide every other day. I haven't cut myself or enacted any other physical harm upon myself. But I just want an end to this. I go through School looking down, feeling worthless. People don't seem to notice or even care. I'm all alone. This is the first time I've ever posted my problems online so...