What's wrong with me? ):

[jenni16]

This is likely one of the most cliche forums to see, but I really need help...

I've recently been feeling really sad and hateful towards myself because I feel unattractive and undesirable. I don't like how I look whatsoever (no surprise there) and I don't think guys do, either. I can tell this is obvious because I get -no- attention from any of them, they don't even -look- at me. Their eyes are always on my gorgeous friends or something...

I'm so confused because my friends tell me I'm beautiful and pretty, yet the opposite sex doesn't seem to think the same. If it is them, then they're either not my type or too young/old.

I've been called ugly more than once by guys, so this has really put me down also. However, it was a long time ago.. like, years ago. I've also been told that I look like a 10 year old. :/ Maybe that's what it is? Either way, it's really put a weight on my back. I got so sad today that I left school early, but that was mainly because a cute guy who actually seemed interested really wasn't, 'cause he said he had a GF. I could have sworn he was interested in me by the way he was acting and all the stares he was giving me and the fact that he initiated conversations, but.. nope. Just my luck. Maybe it's 'cause I have yet to see the behavior in men? I don't have much experience with them, but that's mainly due to skipping two years of school from a personal problem.. yeah, I was away for quite some time. He would be the second guy in my experience to seem interested WITH a GF.

After that, I told him I get barely any attention from guys and he didn't really say anything.. it was as if 'he could see why'. I don't know, maybe I'm just paranoid but it really caused everything to come tumbling down on me. When I was walking home from school I started beating myself up in my head, calling myself ugly and undesirable.. all that crap. I even cried. I just hate myself.. I'm sick of being alone. I want to know what it feels like to be with someone; I want that experience! If I'm so pretty and ****, then WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME? I try to be friendly with everyone and wear a smile on my face, but even still they don't pay me any attention.

Btw, I'm 16..

[UnsureMS]

Hi sweetie,

This message I pray finds you in time and helps. Sweetie, first off I want to say that we all have something about ourselves we don't like. That is normal! The thing I want to strongly suggested is please try to see just how beautiful you really are. Confidence shines on people. Guys can sense when a girl is down on herself, and this may scare a guy off.

Everyone deserves someone out there, but you have to let it be at its own time. Also, don't let a guy get the best of your emotions you are better then that. Boys at your age love to play games just as much as the girls. You should never be hurt by any guy. Instead just move on, and enjoy your life.

You are only 16 and have plenty of time for boys. Please sweetie, you sound like you are trying to grow up to quick. Save yourself for the right one for you. If you do that then when the day comes and you find the boy for you. You will look back and wonder why you were letting the others get to you so. Dont give into a boy either just because you are interested and long for a boyfriend.

The last tip I have for you, which may sound weird is sometime the opposite of what your type is...is who you need to give a chance. Don't discount someone just because of minor details. Get to know whatever boy you want to give a chance or who is interested in you well before you get serious. My husband wasn't completely not my type but we have been together going on 9 years.

I guess I honestly have one more tip. The more you just don't care about what others think the more attention you will get. The girls that play hard to get are the ones that guys want. But still as I have stated don't let a guy get the best of you. When I say don't care what others think I mean be yourself. Don't try so hard to please everyone else. Instead make yourself happy.

See, I never have been the girly type. I don't wear makeup or dress up. I hate doing my hair, and nails. I would rather be outside then indoors. I use to play like the boys. I never let anyone change that about me. And I just went with the flow. I had many boys act messed up toward me. But I didn't let them get to me...I just trusted the right guy for me was out there.

I know what you are going through and if you need someone to talk to just pm me. If you ever just want to vent pm me. But please stop beating yourself up over those stupid immature little boys, and start believing in yourself. May god bless you,

Kimberly

[jessilb]

Hi, I am older but I have the same kind of problem.  I haven't had a guy since my sons father left 4 1/2 years ago.  I am older and bigger and wrinkles and grey hair coming.  I feel like you do, like I am ugly.  I go out to clubs and all my friends get talked to and danced with, and I sit there.  But, you know what, it's ok.  You may not be beautiful to everyone, that is a taste thing.  You do need to be beautiful to yorself and on the inside.  Keep that smile on and do not assume people like you because you share a conversation or a passing look.  If someone likes you they will tell you.  Try to watch the movie "He's just not that into you"  it has all the mistakes women make involving thoughts of men liking them.  But, definately do not go to far with a guy just because he says he likes you.  When I was younger I made that mistake, save yourself for someone who really loves you.  And, do not trust the first guy who says he loves you after a couple of dates either.  Trust your instinct.  I know you don't think sex is ever going to come up because you can't find anyone yet.  Believe me ity will happen, and fast, so be careful.  But anyway, love yourself.  Make yourself pretty in your home by putting on something you really like, and some make-up and just strut around like your a supermodel.  It sounds silly but sometimes it works.  I will pray for you to see the beauty in yourself and to find someone special who sees your beauty too.

[mishymoshymarcy]

Im so sorry you feel this way.....you are beautiful, please try to look yourself in the mirror abd tell yourself you are beautiful. I know that souns stupid if you dont believe it, but you eventually will. Your time will come. The time when a boy comes and tells you you are beautiful. I havent had a boy tell me. although my situation is a little different but i know what it feels like in a way.... Just give it time....the right guy will come along. I mean if these guys are not interested then who cares, they are not worth it. And most of all, some are just blind and have no idea what they are missing. Dont let silly guys get to you too much. Your gorgeous, please keep telling yourself that.

[jenni16]

Accidentally posted this twice...