Graves disease is so hard to deal with. I recently had my thyroid removed. I had hashitoxicosis which is basically the hyper part of hashimotos hypothyroidism. I was hyperthyroid all of the time which made it a pretty similar experience to graves. TO deal with the feeling of heart racing, panic, headaches, hot flashes, anxiety, heart palps etc etc is really tough. At times I just stayed in my room praying I'd live. I spent a year of my life not really able to do ANYTHING. With that being said, there is no quick fix. Surgery is not going to be and instant fix. It takes time to regulate the meds. I'm 8 days post op right now and feeling hyper again =(. I have to cut back on the meds a bit. It takes some time, but hopefully he will never have to experience the horribleness he is feeling now. On the bright side, you can just decrease your meds and not be hyper anymore, unlike with how he is now and how I was... you can't stop it.
It's not an easy road, so I'd tell you if you really love him, you're going to have to stick with him for a while (Just as you would if he had cancer or some other disease). I pray that he will be one of the lucky ones that finds relief quickly.
I think the depression symptoms are less about the secondary thoughts of poor body image etc caused from the weight gain. I believe they are more direct. As Thyroid hormone sets the pace of the entire metabolism of the body, I suspect (and this is only my thoughts and theory) that if your cells in your brain are not responding as quickly as they would if there were proper thyroid in the blood that may effect general lethargy and depression itself.
Some people report that they would rather feel Hypo than Hyper. That is they would rather generally feel like total crap and be lazy and sleepy than freaked out wondering if their heart is going to pound out of their chest.
But feeling like crap is no way to live either.
Everyone reacts different to how things affect them. Me personally I did not get depression with hyper or hypo.
I hit a thyroid storm without evening knowing it. I think my ignorance & being only 23 played a part in ignoring my symptoms. I was to busy with a 1yr old and a full time job. I guess I just assumed that was life...always on the go.
Yes I had symptoms, weight loss, insomnia, headaches, tremors, hot flashes, muscle cramps, heart rate at 140 sitting down relaxing, BUT in all honesty I never questioned it I REALLY thought it was because I was always on the go. I did go to dr. but was told it was all stress related, so yes I believed them. It was not until I was down to 88 lbs (but ate like a horse) & my necked swelled (couldn't ignore the huge neck) that I went in again.
Long story short, did RAI, hit a thyroid storm, then TT.
All good now. This was of course 17yrs ago.
I think I am the one getting depressed. I can't tell if the changes I am seeing are the thyroid problem, or if he just can't stand being around me anymore. I 've been patient, and given him lots of space, yet more and more it feels as if I could vanish and he wouldn't know I was gone. I tell myself it's not me, it's the thyroid, because it's such a Huge drastic change in everything about him. He was so caring and full of joy and laughing all the time. Making everyone laugh around him. He's always been the life of the crowd. Now he looks angry, bitter, and oblivious to everything around him. Can't concentrate long enough to even notice there's a problem. I don't want to leave. I don't believe that is the right answer. But I feel so sad. I really need to know if this change, is going to change back to who he really is. If I know that I can be strong. If its something that others go through and it changes them forever, I need to know. I realize that everyone is different, however, there are many people out there that have had similar experiences, and I am hoping to find you out there. For answers we both are desperately seeking in this horrible road we have to go down. He probably had this going on for about a year before he went in. His doctor said to be worse than he was at that time, was to risk coma or death. I'm wondering how this long time of not treating it has affected him physically in the long run..
I addressed this to Totie, but I am asking anyone willing to help. :)
I pray he will find relief quickly too. I love him very much, and want to see him feeling better. He seems so miserable. I plan to stick with him through this, I just have a hard time figuring out if he wants me here , or if he's pushing me away without realizing it. I cannot stress how completely different his behavior has changed. Has anyone else had this big of a change in their .... well.....everything????
When your heart is racing and palpitating and your body is doing horrible things, you cannot concentrate or be nice. Your basic plan for life is survival. I know this is sad, but it really comes down to this. When I hit what I believe was a thyroid storm, I laid in my bed with my heart rate at 150. I couldn't sit up, move, do anything. I couldn't breather. My 5 year old came in asking for things from mommy and I couldn't do ANYTHING. WHen I stood up I would almost pass out from my heart racing so fast. It's a hard time.
None of us have a look into your relationship, so we can't say if this is the sole reason he has changed without having some personal insight. All I can say is you have to decide what you are willing to do, and what is best for you. Being sick like he is CAN change you though, it happened to me out of necessity to live and make it through what was going on. I'm still changed a year later though, so if it is too much for you, you need to evaluate it! I wish it wasn't such a hard road, but it is. Now, some people find the road to wellness faster than others, but that is the nature of the process. It is unpredictable. It could be fast, and I hope for both of your sakes it is, but in all reality, you should know there is a real chance that this could go on for a long time until he reaches optimal levels. Even then, he has to get over the negative conditioning his body has been through. This can be life-altering. Good luck! I know it must be depressing dealing with it on the other side. You just have to decide if this is going to be what is best for you.