Aa
Feeling validated
Just thought I'd share....I went on the Lance Armstrong foundation website and was reading "survivor" stories and at first I didn't find anyone that had thyroid cancer. Then I went to another page and read actually several stories on thyroid survivors. It just really made everything all of us go through "real" because I know I have had comments that I have "the best type of cancer" or "the fake kind". Luckily my family and friends aren't ignorant and are definitely taking this seriously! Just wanted to share that with my other Survivors!
You two are very sweet. I feel so at home and relaxed here, What a great feeling. Your kind words mean alot even tho I don't know you very well. I just discovered in the upper right corner I can display the post I am repling to..thats great as the brain fog seems to be getting thicker as the days go by, 6 more weeks till they test my blood.. :(..
Redhed87, My daughter's father was only 25 when he died and I was 20. he accidently shot himself messing with a loaded gun. I often would ask why would God want to take him so young. I thought my world ended that day but I just had to regroup and a different world began. It took a long time and I made some really stupid mistakes. but we live and learn that's what I say. I look at it this way as well I have the most beautiful daughter in the world. I never had any more kids and no regrets. My daughter doesn't like being an only child tho and wants 5 or 6 kids of her own.. I say bring it on I am ready to be a Grandma!!
Kitcurious. I got to thinking maybe those sort of people (selfish self centered) are brought into our life so we can teach them a thing or two in a more quiet and loving way.
Take care.. and as always the big guy upstairs has brought this group in my life for some very good reasons and just when I needed it most. You know the funny thing is I don't go to church but I am very spiritual and I am a believer.
See ya.. Jean
Redhed87, My daughter's father was only 25 when he died and I was 20. he accidently shot himself messing with a loaded gun. I often would ask why would God want to take him so young. I thought my world ended that day but I just had to regroup and a different world began. It took a long time and I made some really stupid mistakes. but we live and learn that's what I say. I look at it this way as well I have the most beautiful daughter in the world. I never had any more kids and no regrets. My daughter doesn't like being an only child tho and wants 5 or 6 kids of her own.. I say bring it on I am ready to be a Grandma!!
Kitcurious. I got to thinking maybe those sort of people (selfish self centered) are brought into our life so we can teach them a thing or two in a more quiet and loving way.
Take care.. and as always the big guy upstairs has brought this group in my life for some very good reasons and just when I needed it most. You know the funny thing is I don't go to church but I am very spiritual and I am a believer.
See ya.. Jean
Thank you so very much for your reassuring words. It is even more generous for you to think of others feelings when you have been through so very much yourself .You are much appreciated.
Yes, my son is kind to everyone. He would never want to make anyone unhappy.
The same friend asks when we are getting together or sends me an email now and I reply politely but not at length. I resist the urge to "delete" it. I am now kind of wary.
My guess is that ,at some level, many of our "mess up" friends/colleagues mean well. They don't mean to say or do the wrong thing, not exactly, but they do and it can be quite hurtful. Some of the people don't mean well though and are revealing a degree of selfishness that is astonishing.
Hard times reveal the character that was always there.
You have strong character and a kind, empathetic nature. It's who you are and considering what you've been through, inspiring to see.
I believe that is a gift.
When those we feel close to let us down, a warm heart can also cause pain, so I understand the caution about getting close to, or being vulenerable to people
It's so good to have this forum to come to.
Thank you all :-)
Yes, my son is kind to everyone. He would never want to make anyone unhappy.
The same friend asks when we are getting together or sends me an email now and I reply politely but not at length. I resist the urge to "delete" it. I am now kind of wary.
My guess is that ,at some level, many of our "mess up" friends/colleagues mean well. They don't mean to say or do the wrong thing, not exactly, but they do and it can be quite hurtful. Some of the people don't mean well though and are revealing a degree of selfishness that is astonishing.
Hard times reveal the character that was always there.
You have strong character and a kind, empathetic nature. It's who you are and considering what you've been through, inspiring to see.
I believe that is a gift.
When those we feel close to let us down, a warm heart can also cause pain, so I understand the caution about getting close to, or being vulenerable to people
It's so good to have this forum to come to.
Thank you all :-)
The strongest people I know have had many trials and tribulations in their lives. I am so sorry that you have had so many. My sister was also a widow at the age of 28 and had a 17 month old at the time. Her childhood sweetheart husband was 31 and died after a long bout with cancer. She endured so much for such a young person, but was strong through it all. Although she has been remarried for the past 10 years to a wonderful man who treats her daughter as if she has always been his, her daughter is everything to her. You sound like a wonderful person and you are strong. I know with your positive energy, you will have many more happy times to come.
I had a similiar experience with a co-worker who I thought was a friend also. Not once did she call to ask how I was the 3 wks I was away from work....although there have been numerous times in the six years I've known her that she called me while I was at home sick with a cold or flu. When I did go back to work she did asked me how I was doing and then cut me off in mid-sentence when I was try to tell her, then went back to what she was doing. I felt really hurt by her attitude. Her lack of compassion for what I was going thru, definitely changed my attitude toward her...she's just a co-worker and not a true friend. BTW.....I took a month off prior to my surgery and was off 3 weeks after my TT...because of that my co-worker had to do the project I would normally do. I think it ticked her off that she had the extra work piled on her. I know my co-workers and my boss still to this day, can't begin to understand the hell I was going thru, especially before surgery. My boss expected me to give a briefing to the director of our organization, the day before my FNA. Here I am waiting to find out if I have cancer, and he wants me to give a high profile briefing. I had so much brain fog at the time I could barely remember what I had for lunch at 12:05 when I ate the lunch at 12:00. That was when I decided to see my doctor about going on short term disability.
Sorry for the dissertation....I get really irked about people thinking thyca, or even thyroid disorders, is no big deal. That's why I love this website so much. It truly helps to talk with people who have "been there, done that" too.
Sorry for the dissertation....I get really irked about people thinking thyca, or even thyroid disorders, is no big deal. That's why I love this website so much. It truly helps to talk with people who have "been there, done that" too.
It just kill me when they tell me thyca is the good cancer.How would they feel if it ws them with a cancer dx?.Oh well When the doctor forst told me they found cancer I kept seeing the word in big black letters in front of me.Then he said the good knd work and I just lost it.I was already manic form too much synthroid so it didnt take much for me to wig out.
Any way...
Love Venora
Any way...
Love Venora
I agree 100%. Cancer is Cancer. There no way around that one. They have come so far in cancer treatment these days. I like to look at the sunny side.. I believe thousands of people with cancer live now. That's awesome!! and if it had been 5,10 15, or 20 years ago that wasn't the case. Please I am not trying to take away from the fact that cancer is awful. Cancer is not always a death sentence these day Thank God.. You are and will continue being a survivor. Those stories are great huh..
Jean
Jean
I feel rotten that your friend would say something to you like that. You must be a very wonderful and kind person to be a friend to her. I would be questioning the friendship. You are truely a kind spirited person. I would have told her to blank off. Your son is a product of you.. a sweet sweet kind boy to his mama. and I bet to others as well. take care.
Jean
Jean
I just thought you all would want to read the stories on the Lance's site- it was just validating. I am glad I don't have another type of cancer- trust me. My sister lost her husband- he was 31 and she was a widow at 28 with a 17 month old. My niece is now 15, but it was the worst thing our family experienced. I am so fortunate for a great prognosis- but people need to be more educated I guess and of course empathetic. Like I said, my family and friends are not ignorant- any cancer diagnosis is not a good one. I actually have had squamous cell carcinoma and basal cell carcinoma on my face. Squamous was the worst one. I never considered that "real" cancer, but now my thoughts have changed. Cancer is cancer.....Thanks for all of your support.
I am so fortuante to be able to have the summer off for work- I'm a teacher. It just kind of worked out that way. I took off several days here and there for tests, which does disrupt my students, but I only missed the last 3 and half days with them. Hopefully I can start at the beginning of the year. You definitely find out who your friends are.......
I have found that a lot of 'friends' find it a lot easier to ignore the fact that people have cancer. If they don't discuss it - then it doesn't exist.
Just on 2 years ago my best friend was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer. Before hr diagnosis the guy that lived across the road from her and her husband used to regularly call in for a beer every night. Once she was diagnosed - that was it - he didn't call in again. Said that seeing her upset HIM. Didn't care that it upset HER. But meanwhile he still would talk to the husband and have drinks with him around another neighbours (a guys get together type thing).
It made me so angry but she just took it with a grain of salt. Needless to say, 18 months later when she passed away he turned up to the funeral but couldn't go to the wake because it would upset him!!!
In my case, it took 6 weeks after my second partial (In 2 days) for my supposed good friends to ring me up and then it was just because the wife was going in for knee surgery the next day and needed reassurance about undergoing a GA. To this day (almost 5 months later) they still have not asked the results or prognisis. I think they are just too scared to ask in case the news is bad.
When will people understand that they don't have to worry about saying the wrong things and avoid people but that just by being there they are helping.
Just on 2 years ago my best friend was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer. Before hr diagnosis the guy that lived across the road from her and her husband used to regularly call in for a beer every night. Once she was diagnosed - that was it - he didn't call in again. Said that seeing her upset HIM. Didn't care that it upset HER. But meanwhile he still would talk to the husband and have drinks with him around another neighbours (a guys get together type thing).
It made me so angry but she just took it with a grain of salt. Needless to say, 18 months later when she passed away he turned up to the funeral but couldn't go to the wake because it would upset him!!!
In my case, it took 6 weeks after my second partial (In 2 days) for my supposed good friends to ring me up and then it was just because the wife was going in for knee surgery the next day and needed reassurance about undergoing a GA. To this day (almost 5 months later) they still have not asked the results or prognisis. I think they are just too scared to ask in case the news is bad.
When will people understand that they don't have to worry about saying the wrong things and avoid people but that just by being there they are helping.
You definitely know who your friends are- all of mine have been great, some don't know what to say, but show it in other ways- like my male friends from work just give me a smile or something. I know they just don't know what ot say. Chin up.
My best friend moved hundreds of miles away.. She was going to hop on a plane to come be with me when I had my PT surgery but I refused. My closes other friends beside my wonderful 22 yr old daughter are my co-workers. I am single. My daughter's father passed away when she was only 18 months old. Only one person called and that was the newest member of our team a female.. I have taken in consideration that all the others are men, but was still hurt because the one guy and I car pool in the winter and has my number in his cell phone. I do have trouble getting close to people because my mom married a man when I was ten years old that didn't want kids so she just dumped us in a foster home to never live with her again. That was only the begining of a horrible childhood but that is the past and I turned out to be a very strong willed person and very independent and good person and the most important thing not bitter I have forgiven my mom. One of the reason's I love this group I can open up and not have any worries and the fact everyone understands our issues in one way or another.. Thanks for listening.. I could write a book about my life..It would be a tear jerker but with a happy ending..
Jean
Jean
My Primary Dr. said "You are more likely to get hit by a car crossing the street and die than from the Thyroid Cancer, etc." and then the Endocrinologist said, "let's lose the Micro in front of the word carcinoma ... it is Cancer and doesn't matter if large or small...." SO GO FIGURE ..... and then I was very very hyper/nervous about all this with tons of anxiety and I think the two of them spoke and all they both kept doing was reassuring me at every phonecall or visit ...... geez ........... didn't I have a right to be hyper/anxious/nervous ... me, too .... ALL I SAW WAS A STAMP IN FRONT OF ME with the words carcinoma ... that changed my life forever ... and I don't care how big or small it still is now a part of me and happened overnight.
C~ :::)))
C~ :::)))
I am sorry about the thyca diagnosis as well. Hypo is just awful and even though they have a sound reason for making you endure it, it is so hard, especially once you've had a chance to feel better for a while. Going back must take a lot of strength. It galls me how people are so self-absorbed that they actually try to deny empathy to people who are sick.
One friend of mine is a good example. I have listened to complaints about her various problems for 20 years and as soon as I told her my US results and that I have felt bad for months but not said much about it, she told me that her sister-in-law has brain cancer and anything they can treat doesn't matter.
Perhaps not to her, in the scheme of things, but I've been listening to her non- specific ailments for years and giving her nothing but kindness.
How about that? I actually choked back tears when she blew me off like that.
I guess these are things that show us who really cares about us and who doesn't.
My sweet son is always asking if he can help me with anything. That's one in my corner.
Venora, I recently started the generic synthroid and thank you for answering my question about why I am acting the way I am. I am more agitated than my worst PMS.
One friend of mine is a good example. I have listened to complaints about her various problems for 20 years and as soon as I told her my US results and that I have felt bad for months but not said much about it, she told me that her sister-in-law has brain cancer and anything they can treat doesn't matter.
Perhaps not to her, in the scheme of things, but I've been listening to her non- specific ailments for years and giving her nothing but kindness.
How about that? I actually choked back tears when she blew me off like that.
I guess these are things that show us who really cares about us and who doesn't.
My sweet son is always asking if he can help me with anything. That's one in my corner.
Venora, I recently started the generic synthroid and thank you for answering my question about why I am acting the way I am. I am more agitated than my worst PMS.
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