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213044 tn?1236527460

I give up

Went to see a surgeon today.

He was recomended by my current Endo, who admitted on our last conversation that she was completely stumped by my body's reactions to her treatment, and surgery was my best option.

He came into the exam room, told me my history was the most confusing thing he had ever read, then proceeded to tell me that my condition does not exist.

He explained the surgery, which I already understood thoroughly, and then told me RAI was a better option, which the Endo admitted was not in my case.

When I told him I had heart issues he should be aware of, he told me that was wrong, even though two GP's in my home town explained exactly what was going on with my heart. He wouldn't even let me explain it to him, he just cut me off and told me I was wrong.

He told me the thyroid condition I have does not exist, and the only explanation for my TSH problems was that I was not taking my meds as perscribed.

He spent five minutes brow beating me as I tried to explain that my PCP understood more than the Endo, and kept repeating "too many cooks at the stove" until I finally gave in and told him I would do exactly what my Endo wanted, and completely ignore my GP. It was a lie, but I was close to tears by the end and finally told him what he wanted to here.

He wouldn't listen to anything I tried to say, and just kept telling me I was wrong and the Endo who has made me sick over and over and over this year knew more than my GP.

He said I should try RAI first, and if that didn't work, he was always here and would treat me later. When I expressed my concern that RAI may take a lot longer than surgery, he laughed at me and told me to do the RAI, without even discussing RAI or the possible drawbacks.

Specialists seem to be pompous ***** from my experience.

I give up. I have seen the two top endo's in the state, and they both screwed me up in different ways. But the surgeon blamed me and my PCP for all of that.

Frankly, I don't care anymore.
13 Responses
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287230 tn?1197861363
You know what? I agree about the pompous part totally!
I think "specialist" is secret medical acronym for
S elfish
P ompous
E gocentric
C areless
I mpolite
A rrogant
L ying
I mbicilic
S nobbish
T oad

(without a bedside manner worth mentioning...)

At least that is my experience of specialists.  : )
Try and find one that at least has some sense of caring and bedside manner.

Em
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
AR-10,,  Hi

  I feel for you.  Sometimes it seems like the thyroid and all that it can create is a nightmare.  But just like everyone  posted, Never give up!  I  was there and just felt so sick and my thyroid was choking me..  It was a painful road and even now I'm still dealing with the after math of it all.. 2  years later.. and thyroid surgically removed.  The good news is I have faith in God.. I know that with being an advocate for my own health and dismissing docs that are  lazy,lacking in knowledge and well the list goes on,   eventually a good one will come.. I'm currently searching for a decent endo.  As trying and miserable this struggle is, I promise you that  so many people out there like all of us struggle with thyroid and that you are not alone..  And, so sorry that you were treated  that way.. It's not acceptable for a physician to speak to anyone that way and not even   let them finish speaking... Take Care : )
Helpful - 0
200220 tn?1361951554
Just a little comment on my part, I wouldn't do anything without the doctor knowing it.  They do know more than we do and with this type of disease we need to be covered by their knowledge.  We can get different opinions but need to decide on one and go with it exactly as they say to do.  It may take awhile but in the end it will turn out right if we give it a chance.  I have found this out.  I didn't like my endo at first but have found out he knows what he is doing and I am getting better.  He has terrible bedside manner but knows his stuff.  I have found out that the most personalble people are not always the most knowledgeable.  They are just nice.  Decide a course of action and stick with it and the doctor.  It to me, is the best route.  You will stay upset trying to figure it out for yourself.  I hope this helps and doesn't upset you more.   praying for you in Md.   linda
Helpful - 0
168348 tn?1379357075
DO NOT GIVE UP .... sounds like the jerk who was the one of my 4 b4 surgery who said to wait and see and when I asked what happens to those who have cancer taking that approach he calmly replied, "it was their misfortune!!!!" .... and this was my #1 rated surgeon many sent me to!!!!!!

Oh how I wish you lived in NJ .. my Endo is out of this world ... and so was the clinical lab rat Endo who gave me my differing comprehensive opinion after my thyroid surgery ... they both were absolutely in disagreement with ea. other but absolutely fabulous stating their opinions with back facts shown to me on paper reports, etc., etc.  NOT LIKE YOUR DOC WHO Brushed you off rather than admit he was in OVER HIS HEAD!!!!!!!

It is ok to feel defeated but no more than 24hrs .. get ANGRY and use that ANGER to further perpetuate your self help by finding a competent well-versed doc.

C~
Helpful - 0
213044 tn?1236527460
I need to talk to my GP Wednsday or Thursday about other test results I'm waiting on and get some treatment going for my stomach.

I don't want RAI, and I don't want surgery. But of the two, I would rather have as much of the diseased gland taken out as possible. I don't want shriveled up dead stuff in my neck. Especially infected rotting dead stuff.

I've had time to calm down and think things over. I am still very depressed and bitter. But I have thought through what I will do.

I will call my Endo's office and get permission to stop the synthroid and prep for RAI. I will go back to a doctor who is angry with me for several reasons, and literally does not have the time to put my charts in order, read them, and understand me, or give me an appointment so I can see her face to face.

A doctor who I have no desire to be treated by.

When the RAI is behind me I will start seeing another Endo in her office that may be more attentive.

I just don't know if I should do that Monday, or wait and talk to my GP. I think I should talk to my GP first, because the stomach issue may be first on the list, and I don't know if treating it while going very hypo is what he will recommend.

And I don't know if I should stop the Synthroid tomorrow, the first, or wait till I talk to a doctor. I don't know where my blood levels are right now, but they have to be good. I could probably go a few days without and not get into too much trouble.

I just can't take anymore doctor hunting.

The next surgeon would likely think the same. I can't do it anymore. I just want to get SOMETHING done, even if it's the wrong thing, and let my GP monitor and adjust my meds in the future.

It's really depressing. I can't deal with not working. I can't deal with more doctors like these. I can't sit around another six months or a year waiting to start to heal. I can't let more damage occur. I can't think straight.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
To think that I have been wanting to get into see an endocrinologist. Maybe that is not the end all answer that I thought it would be.  I don't get how so many of us have symptoms that don't exist...what is up with that? I know that I am not crazy. Who would want to feel the way we portray ourselves to feel? I think that we have a better way of spending out time..I wish my thyroid was never removed...course didnt have much choice as it was choking me...
And of course giving up.....see meds werent taken...whatever! I get so upset just thinking about going back to a doctor..most of them want to know why I weigh what I do..and blame for the symptoms...something like pointing fingers..what are you doing..what we are doing shouldnt be the point..what are they going to be doing..or can do to help us feel better. I understand we are all different..but that is why they went to med school to learn these are all the possible things that could be going on with people in general with  a twist here and their..maybe more bedside manner coursework needs to be given...making patients feel defensive is always a good option..not! Sorry..you gave me some good infor AR-10..and well...maybe my post isnt so helpful...but you know you arent alone..we have to hang in there..maybe between us all we can feel better...i pray for you-you pray for me type thing! Hang in there..one of my favorite quotes..."Those dont think it can be done are usually passed up by those that do!"  not sure how it applies..just dont give up...we need ya to be plugging on! :)
Helpful - 0
200220 tn?1361951554
I read somewhere that God will not let us give up.  Rest in Him.  He is able to keep you.  Let yourself grieve all the things that had happened to you and then get up and go on.  It is hard but life is worth it.  We never quite know when things will turn around and start going right.  We always have hope.  Look for the one little thing that is good and everyday thank God for that and more.  Your good times are coming again.  I don't know what you believe but find something that you can read that has promises in it and let your heart tell you good things.  I read the psalms and they greatly comfort me.   I agree with the above that sometimes we have to go through a lot before we find the right doctor or treatment or disease.  As my mom used to say to me, "keep on keeping on".   lol and thanks for all your help to me when I need it.    linda
Helpful - 0
304898 tn?1212160236
PLEASE! Don't give up!  I was led to believe that my problem was all in my head.  I was depress - (given an antidepressant), told I had chronic fatigue syndrome.  All this has gone on for 20 years.   Not all specialists are jerks (although many of them ARE).  I work at a local hospital where I live and have seen Drs and their behaviors.  Some of the behaviors are absolutely appalling!  But there are some really, really good Drs and do really care!  and do really listen.  I'm not big on defending Drs, but DO try to remember that being a DR is their JOB.  Everyone has bad days on the job.  I realize that they have a "higher calling" but they have bad days too where they don't feel good or maybe their mom or dad are dying.  Try not to forget that either.  Drs. are still just people.  Having said that, have you tried a DO or naturopathic Dr?  Sometimes they are much more open to things that medical drs are not.  

ABOVE ALL!  Do not give up!  Feeling better is really worth the work to find someone that you like and care about you as a patient.  I'm sorry that SOB had you in tears, or nearly in tears.  That's awful.  Wish I could give you a hug...  

Hang in there!  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal

Sorry you have having so many problems with getting help.  Wish I could send you to my own surgeon, who is a general surgeon with special training in endocrine surgery.  I think that experience is what you want to be seeking.  My orginial issue was a parathyroid gland that had to come out.  I assumed I would be sent to an ENT surgeon (based on a neck surgery my father had had) but was told it had to be the above mentioned.  And he was the one who originally spotted the additional thyroid problem, good thing.  Keep looking.

Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
so sorry you're doctor is such a jerk - I've been yelled at by 3 endos in 2 different states saying Hashimoto''s does not go hypo/hyper only hypo - what idiots - I would also see about finding someone new - I personally knew a general surgeon - they are not schooled on thyroid - just doing surgery - my friend knew nothing of unusual problems w/ thyroid - don't give up - you haven't tried natural - Armour or Westhroid - I went back but @ a much lower dose - I have never liked synthetic so took as little as possible to avoid all the same symptoms you mention in previous post - I am symptom free other than thin hair - and my recent ultrasound showed nothing other than results consistent w/ thyroiditis - thank goodness- try the natural @ a very low dose - you might be surprised - my best to you
Helpful - 0
158939 tn?1274915197
Talk to the hospital.

Don't give up - yeah, it gets unbearably rough but you will manage!  We're here for you as is your wonderful family.  

Do you have another doctor you see whom you trust?  I ended up asking ALL my doctors for a good OB/GYN oncologist (different problem, obviously).  It took me 6 months but I finally found an amazing one.  Don't give up.  I went through a ton of horrible ones before I found a keeper (with a highly suspicious hemorrhaging ovarian cyst) before I found one who cares.  It's a pain but finding the right one is worth the hassle.

Post on here that you are looking for a surgeon in your area and see what the other thyroid patients can find for you.

Your surgeon is out there!
Helpful - 0
213044 tn?1236527460
That's another thing.
He wasn't even an ENT surgeon. He is a general surgeon. My Endo's nurse told me my Endo was sending me to the best thyroid surgeon she knew, and he had plenty of experience.

He did talk thyroid, but I found myself in a women's cancer clinic, and it was obvious it was that and not an endocrinology type clinic. I never got around to asking him what his experience was, because I was on the defensive most of the time.

He insinuated that it could be controlled with meds, that RAI would be apropriate, that surgery was overkill, and that I and my GP were ill informed and I needed to put all my faith in my Endo who is too busy to even see me, let alone look at my charts before I show up.

Neither one of them understand my condition, or even believe it is possible.

I'm tired of doing it. I'm not going to get proper care. Nobody will take the time to read the file. It's too thick.

I just want it to stop.
Helpful - 0
158939 tn?1274915197
DON'T GIVE UP!!  Find another surgeon - one without a god complex!!  Check with the hospital and find out who is the thyroid specialist.  Talk to an ENT.  DON'T GIVE UP.
Helpful - 0
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