Post consult debrief! crying alot...

[KoalaEm]

Went and saw the general surgeon.

He will remove the left part of my thyroid 12 Nov... apparently the chance of the frozen section's capability of determining if it is cancer is about 1%- so I then wait while they test it good and proper for 5 days.  Then if it's cancer I go back in to have the rest of the thyroid out in a second operation  -about 8 weeks later. If all is good then they'll test the levels to see how I am going with 1/2 a thyroid- he said t's likely I will need to take meds- now I am worried that I am going to balloon up like a blimp.
THEN after all the thyroid stuff is out of the way he will do the gallbladder. So if it's benign - he can do the gallbladder mid December. If it's malignant then he'll work out the gallbladder 'later' ie: I assume some undetermined timeframe.
I was really brave and didn't start crying my heart out until I got home... the crying hasn't stopped much since.  The reality of the cancer possibility is starting to hit me hard.

I just keep thinking 'why did this have to happen to me?'
Anyway,
going to bawl my eyes out some more.

Em

[KoalaEm]

THANKS SO MUCH!!!!!!!
I really really really appreciate the support.
My poor husband thinks I am mad- all I could do was sit there last night sobbing.  I couldn't even speak- unusual for me.
I keep thinking I have come this far and now THIS!  I know it is totally irrational, but I keep telling him I just want it to go away.  He say it will, you just have to wait until Nov 12.  I say "No, go away! Not exist at all."
This is such a hard thing that we all face in our own various ways.
Thanks for the support.
Em

[DarlaLOU]

Well, I don't have much in the way of comfort but I think you already know you have found a great forum of really helpful and supportive people here. I would not have made it through the last 8 weeks w/out this chat site. Lean on us, we are here for you!!
Lots of prayers.
Darla

[patient-x]

Hi again Em
I had cancer 10 years ago...I had cervical, which had spread to my lymph glands & surrounding tissue. I had a lot of treatment that took 6 months but I am here now to tell the story.

I often worry that it spread & thats why I feel so bad at times now days...I sometimes think the docs are overlooking it...well, thats just how I think on occasions. The sensible me knows they would know if I had more than Graves disease.

I worry about all sorts...like what will I wear when I am going out in two weeks...it can actually keep me awake. But, when I found out I had the Cancer I actually did not worry...for once in my life. I think because it was something that was out of my hands, something I could not change, so I had to think positive & be grateful it was found & was going to be treated & got rid of etc. I just wanted the docs to hurry up & treat me...just get on with it!

I understand how you feel, and about the weight, I am overweight at the mo & hate it, but when I feel in the right frame of mind (one day) I will follow the what to eat & what not to eat guide in one of my thyroid books.
So no more negative thinking. Keep thinking of a better healthier future.

If you ever want to talk I am here....even if you just want to have a good moan I am here.

[lorrie ann]

Just wanted to say that I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

This whole thing is just plain scary.  I am working on different tests right now for a thyroid nodule I have.  My mom was just 3 years older than I am now when she was diagnosed with thyroid cancer, so the possibility that mine is cancerous as well, is pretty heavy on my mind.  But, she has been in remission for 25 years this month.  So that is definitely a positive thought!  And I agree with Jen, you are on the road to getting everything fixed, so try to keep that in mind.  I think the worst part is all the waiting!  God is teaching me some serious patience!  I have really been trying to focus on the thought that whatever it is, it is, and no amount of worry will change that.  So I will just take each step in the journey and worry about what I need to at the time, and not think about all the what if's.  Way easier said than done, but just know that we are going thru the same thing at the same time and you are not alone.  And maybe that will be a little comforting to you.  

[KoalaEm]

Thanks for the kind words Jen- I really appreciate the support right now.
I think I am just extra sensitive about the weight issue as over the last 3 years I managed to slowly  rid myself of around 125lbs of excess weight the good old fashioned hard way through exercise and diet.  Now the possibility that I could gain some back scares me.
The possibility of cancer is numbing my brain.  
Ahh... this thyroid business is a pain in the neck! Literally!  LOL!
Em

[patient-x]

How brave you have been today.
What a lot you have had to take in. Well done.

At least you are in good hands, thinks are being looked at, and you will get any treatment you need to make you well again.

I am sure you wont end up ballooning like a blimp...once you are on the correct meds this shouldnt happen, & if you do feel the weight coming on, there are lots of books about diet for people with thyroid disease.

I hope you have had cried yourself out now. For now ...what may happen to your weight should not be something for you to worry or get upset about...think positive, you are now on the road to getting the treatment you need.

Good luck
Jen x