Tying The Knot Community
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Avatar universal


I really have no idea even really where to begin, but have been looking into who to invite to the wedding. I would like a somewhat small wedding, as I don't like to be the center of attention and like things to be more personal. My fiance and I are paying for most of our wedding, but my parents are helping to pay for some of it. My mother keeps talking about inviting all of these people, family friends, people who have watched me grow up, neighbors we've known for years, etc etc. The list seems to get bigger and bigger!! So how do you decide who to cut off and who to invite?
4 Responses
193137 tn?1367883663
My sister is getting married on 5/7 and we've had a lot of added guests from our parents. It's super annoying that our mother added on all these relatives that we see once a year (if at all). But since she gave my sister money for the wedding (and she took it), you really can't say no.

When I get married, I plan to have a destination wedding. It's like charging an admissions fee. If they really want to be there, they'll pony up the money to attend. If they don't really want to be there, and my parents really want them to be there, then my parents can pay for the plane tickets, hotel and other costs and get them there.

The guest list is the most contentious part of wedding planning, in my opinion. And once you start inviting one person or group of persons, then you have to invite a whole slew of more people. If you really don't want these people there or pay for them, I guess you could tell your parents what it'll actually cost to have these additional people and ask them if they think it's worth it. If it is, then maybe they'll pay for it.
620923 tn?1452919248

  Hi , my DD was married this past Oct...and she had a budget for the reception....they made a list of who they wanted, they paid for it so it was their choice...but, using the budget as a guide it was easy to say I have to cut someone.....

U can also pic ur venue and many have restrictions on how many u can have ...so that helps as well...pick ur poison so to speak as to what will dictate, budget or location.....

U may also want to limit bringing children.....this is one way to help cut the list down.....and start with people u see on a reg basis....

Good luck and happy planning : )

Avatar universal
So we basically have the guest list planned out and are having a small wedding. Mostly family and a very small amount of friends. A few long time family friends are not being invited, though I think they all assume they are going to be invited. My mother's friend was over the other day and said congrats to me in person and was asking about the wedding. Then she said, she'd have to mark down the day I said about when my wedding is. :( Though she is not going to be invited. I don't keep in touch with her daughter any more at all and even though they live around the corner, I don't see them often or talk to them. We are on a budget and even if we had the money, would still want a small wedding. We're not inviting children and everyone knows that, but I feel bad not inviting some long time family friends. Though I do know I have to cut down the list somehow. We have the list of everyone we're inviting and kind of a second list too, so when people say they can't come, we might add in others from that second list. Just hope people will rsvp in a timely manner.
620923 tn?1452919248

  Hi...my DD did the same thing as u, and those that were a little upset, when given the opportunity to come still did not...invite who u want, do not try to add on as it  is just stressful....and those that did not get the initial invite will not come....U want to enjoy ur day and stay with in budget...so stick to ur original list.

  No one ever rsvps on time....

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