It started in 2014,
I had a panic attack, something I've never experienced before. I remember feeling something in my gut, a pain that was growing for almost a year before the episode. When I went to the hospital during that panic attack, I exclaimed that it had to be my stomach, something was in my stomach.
I was sent home with a giant bottle of Xanax, taking half a pill a day which eventually drew to 2 pills.
Despite this, I was trying to get back into shape, cardio, strength training. Attempting to get back to how I was in the Marine Corps.
I was sure it was something stomach oriented because I was deployed to Sangin, Afghanistan and while there, I ate their food and they were far from a clean people. I figured it had to be parasites. But despite what my conclusion was, the VA found nothing in my stool and chalked up my stomach problem to GERD.
I was then taking Proton Pump Inhibitors. Which felt like it was making the symptoms worse - more pain.
Eventually, I stopped taking them and decided to look into more natural ways of dealing with parasites; Cloves of garlic (Which was horribly painful and I should have never just eaten them as such), coffee enemas, juicing on a regiment for almost a year straight, Tinctures: Black walnut, cloves, wormwood, diatomaceous earth. All of these things for months and while deciding to go cold turkey on Xanax, because of how horrible that made me felt as well.
I will never forget 2015-2016, I was living with my mom because I was having to go to the hospital for episodes of something they never figured out what it was, meanwhile my mom trying to figure out what was going on through her internet research. I remember a moment sitting in the hospital and the doctor trying to talk to me but I couldn't comprehend the words he was saying. I heard him, but I simply couldn't understand. Later in that same time frame, there was a moment I was hallucinating voices on her couch because my entire body was in pain. I had enough of calling 911, even though my mom did it for me. I rejected going to the hospital only for them to find nothing. Despite the most unusual of symptoms: One hand red while the other one stayed white. Heart palpitations and/or fast heart rate, dark circles over my eyes (NOT UNDER). My circulation was so off that I slept on a massage table belonging to my sister so my arms could hang and not fall asleep at my side.
I lost 40 pounds and my hips actually shrunk - as in the actually bones of my hips actually shrunk. Which i'm not complaining too much about.
Eventually I found a neurologist who decided an MRI was needed. They found calcification's all over the left side of my brain and didn't know what to make of it. After doing my own research the only thing that matches was dead parasites. But it seemed doctors didn't want to admit to that.
I put together that possibly I did in fact kill the parasites on my campaign to kill any parasites that may have been in my stomach and those calcification's were the dead eggs as a result.
I had a heart echo - clean.
I saw an endocrinologist - clean, expect for high potassium.
Inner ear specialist - clea,
Acupuncturist - Low Kidney Blood. Deficiency of some kind. Toxic blood.
A year after the MRI the calcification's were gone. But I was still having these episodes where my heart would sink, my blood pressure would fall and then my heart would begin racing in order to compensate.
I decided I couldn't live like this anymore and that doctors simply just didn't care enough or it was beyond them. I decided to turn to spiritual practices and meditation, acupuncture and Chinese medicine. I decided that I couldn't be holed up in my moms house anymore and I needed to change everything. I wouldn't let whatever was wrong with me to get the best of me. I sold almost everything I owned and never went back to the computer job that I had again. I traveled to the midwest and found the most interesting of people, including an acupuncturist that analyzed blood samples. He showed me how my body was full of toxins, despite healthy eating of literally only; almonds, rye bread, salt water/water, spinach, turkey, pepper, cayenne pepper and turmeric - for the past 3 months of running around the midwest in a truck.
The episodes were becoming less frequent, but I always needed to know where the nearest hospital was.
Here I am now: I have dark circles over my eyes and in between the bridge of nose and my eyes (NOT UNDER MY EYES). I get random bouts of vertigo, My heart pounds like its going to launch out of my chest at least twice, if not more, a day. I'm always tired, but can't sleep for long periods of time because my back is always aching. I went from being the guy that could sit in the middle of a combat zone in an MRAP and be perfectly comfortable in my own body. Now I live less then a mile from a hospital and live with complete agoraphobia because I don't know when I'll have another episode or what it will do to me.
I am trying every day to fight it. Every day I have to worry if I'm about to have a heart attack. I feel like there's some kind of correlation with what I eat, But I've been on three 3-day fasts and my symptoms get worse. I've tried Internment fasting for weeks and I've had more episodes trigger then, than ever.
I don't understand it. I don't know what to do to make it better. I cook my own food. I buy expensive high quality vegetables, nuts, meats. I barely touch anything unhealthy, but Ironically when I do, I feel better sometimes. 2016 Christmas, I was so fed-up with everyone having a good time eating whatever they want that I said 'F' it, I'm going to eat all the baked goods. During that time, the episodes stopped for weeks. You'd think it'd be the salt, but I drink salt water all the time and my symptoms are barely stable enough for me to be active enough to go on a walk and even that makes my symptoms seemingly worse later in the day. (I used to run 13 miles because my Sergeant told me to!) But now here I am.
All this started at 26 for me and now here I am 29, wondering if I'll make it to 30.