Hello,
Shoulder injury at age 15 still undiagnosed at age 47. HELP!
I am curious what type of injury I have? What can I expect to happen in the future?
32 years ago, at age 15, my aunt’s 35 year-old boyfriend physically accosted me. When I stood up from the ground, my right arm was non-responsive and hanging awkwardly. I did not dislocate my shoulder, it was in the socket. Over the next few minutes I was able to move my arm, but not without great pain. I was not able to put my arm above my head no matter how much I willed it.
Immediate symptoms were, unable to move my head to the left if my chin was pressed to my chest. This is different than pain stopped me from moving my head... I could take my hand and force my head to one side and an intense pain/burning sensation was felt in my upper back in my shoulder (think washing hair in sink) if attempting to do so, I could not turn my head to the left…it was impossible.
Once back from vacation I went to the family doctor who informed me that I may have strained something and he would have me take physical therapy. I do not remember why my parents did not allow it. Originally, I had hidden what my aunt’s boyfriend had done to me and hid the injury as well. Maybe, my parents did not believe that I was injured very badly.
Nonetheless, the injury persists. When lying on my back on a hard surface it feels as though there is no muscle covering the bone in my right upper back/shoulder. It has a strange sensation that is hard to describe other than it feels as though the muscle is completely missing and the bone is pushing into the fat/skin layer. If I bend over while facing a mirror and make the classic muscle flex, there is a noticeable amount of mass missing out of my right upper back. I am right handed…I’d think I would be more developed on that side.
Most recently, while lying on my back, working on a vehicle with my right arm bent over my head I attempted to lift a heavy starter into my truck. It scared me as my shoulder partially? Dislocated? The pain and horrible sucking sound made me worry that this is going to happen more frequently.
I currently have a history of going to the doctor for this injury.
To date; the original doctor suggested I need physical therapy for a possible strain, another doctor years later suggested something about a rotator cuff injury and suggested nothing more. A third instructed me sternly that there is nothing wrong with my shoulder and most recently, I had the strangest response of all.
It is important to remember that I have never received so much as an aspirin for this injury. As I am sitting there with my latest doctor (medical insurance constantly demands different doctors over the years so there is no consistency of healthcare). I relive the shoulder injury and he interrupts my story to inform me that I do not have an injury. This is strange as anyone who would take the time to care, would be able to see the injury with their eyes, yet I have never had so much as my shirt off for them to diagnose it while seated across from me is telling of something. Furthermore, anyone with ears can audibly hear the injury. To this day, my shoulder has a loud sucking/popping sound that has entertained the whole family over the years. It grosses my daughters out. Yet, slowly over the years, other doctors lean in this same direction. That I do not have an injury. When I pushed back and questioned my newest medical authority he immediately told me, I needed physical therapy. Odd, as moments earlier I had no injury. This time however, I went to therapy.
After a couple of visits to therapy, I started to complain about the pain they were causing with my shoulder. To me it was debilitating not therapeutic. This pain is different from sore muscles. I can bench a couple hundred pounds. I can lift several hundred pounds. The therapist and I then bantered back and forth about my shoulder. I informed them that my ultimate goal was surgery. In response, I was informed from the therapist that I do not actually have an injury and if I did, it healed years ago. What? I do not know how to respond to this ********. I put myself through a couple more visits and then stopped going as they migrated from my shoulder to my neck and had me in traction. WTF.
I have 32 years of methods to deal with the pain. Never sleep on my right shoulder. Never lift anything above shoulder height if my arm is out-stretched in front of my chest (straight out to the side like Da Vinci’s Vitruvian Man is okay). Never reach from right to left across my chest. These are incredibly difficult self-imposed rules to adhere to, as I am very active. However, now that my arm is beginning to dislocate I am scared for lack of a better word.
I am getting older and the constant pain and injury has spread over the years (NOT HEALED). Sometimes the pain radiates all the way to my elbow. I now have a large patch on my outer arm that goes numb for days at a time or it will tingle, similar to I have something crawling on me. Two upper back vertebrae are perpetually sore now. I absolutely know they are all related, yet, my doctor last informed me; “You have a mental problem…like ptsd” and better yet, the shoulder injury “isn’t really there.” He retired a couple of years ago. I’m tired of the humiliation. In fact, I am completely ruined on Hoosier doctors. I’m rather ornery when describing them nowadays. I believe what has happened is that I have been stereotyped.
I understand that there is absolutely an opioid crisis in America. None of my doctors has mentioned this, yet I have not had so much as an X-ray of my shoulder. Nonetheless, I am proudly, not a part of that crisis. I am however, a 6’4” middle-aged man with a shoulder injury.
The ultimate questions are…How painful will this eventually become and what else will happen as I decline?